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Or the heat of her dysfunction melts snow as she walks...or she scatters vodka as a preventative driveway wash  ;D
Our Community / Re: IIWII: 80/20 Is Enough
« Last post by UrsaMajor on Today at 05:38:15 AM »
I knew that would get you Um  :-* 8)

Love you too dear!   :-* ;D

You just had to poke the bear....
Our Community / Re: Bomb Residue - Macy's journey part three
« Last post by Treasur on Today at 05:36:55 AM »
Macy, dear girl...we are all saying the same thing to you but I think your pain and anger is stopping you hearing us. That's your choice if you want to do that, but those of us who are further down the road are giving you tips on what will help you right now.

1. The situation is as it is currently. You can't change that, only choose how to adapt to it.
2. Decide if you believe in MLC or not. Read and re-read the articles and try to look at it objectively. If you do, follow the advice as best you can, accept your H is no longer the same person right now and you can't fix him but can have detached compassion. If you don't, then see him as a b**tard and respond accordingly.
3. Your H no longer cares about your opinion, feelings or needs currently - it is a waste of time talking to him about them or the R, and makes things harder/worse, so only you can look after your needs and those of your kids. Expect nothing. Be pleasantly surprised if he is reasonable or honest occasionally.
4. You don't want a separation but you can't stop it. All you can do is use the best L you can to protect your interests.
5. Detaching practically and emotionally from whatever your H says, does, thinks or feels will help you look after yourself, your children, make wiser choices and protect your mental health.

It is up to you, Macy - no-one is going to rescue you from this awful situation but you. Please take the time to think as calmly as you can about how you can get your Macy power back and let your H go off into his own crisis.
Our Community / Re: Lost was a place too
« Last post by 31andcounting on Today at 05:34:57 AM »
thanks for the update sobeit!!

You sound like you are in a good spot ;)
good to hear!

Our Community / Re: Don't know how I got here 2
« Last post by 31andcounting on Today at 05:30:16 AM »
I am glad it is over and you made it through cowgirl1  I imagine it was very hard!

continue moving forward now!

Our Community / Re: IIWII: 80/20 Is Enough
« Last post by Mortesbride on Today at 05:21:17 AM »
I knew that would get you Um  :-* 8)
Our Community / Re: Bomb Residue - Macy's journey part three
« Last post by UrsaMajor on Today at 05:19:16 AM »

What 31 said is spot on.... If you poke the monster, you can expect to be bitten.....

Just let him swing in the wind.... Take care of yourself and your kids.... And that is all...

DO NOT engage him! There is no point...
She probably shoveled it herself.   ;D

Unless she has a snow blower.
Our Community / Re: Love and Memories
« Last post by 31andcounting on Today at 05:16:23 AM »
Let him hit (rock bottom) hand!

don't tilt your head down at all!!  You are doing great!
Our Community / Re: The Road Ahead
« Last post by UrsaMajor on Today at 05:15:34 AM »
Stay out of the way of the tornado......
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