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Author Topic: My Story Only Time Will Tell  (Read 1181 times)

Online CanLetGo

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My Story Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #20 on: January 07, 2018, 05:01:46 PM »
Glad your break has been nice, hope S doesn’t get sick now. Good luck with your job applications! Look forward to hearing how your year unfolds, May sounds very action packed & exciting!
Me 44
H 47
3 young adult kids
BD December 2013, left home August 2014
OW 17 years younger

Online CanLetGo

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #21 on: January 07, 2018, 05:06:25 PM »
Thought I would reply over here Faith 😊😂 I think I am a bit obsessed with stranger things too, we started watching more st (I think that’s what it was called) last night, where they are doing round table chats with the actors and the creators etc, was good! We watched it over 2-3 nights, that’s the bad thing with streaming, it’s over so quickly & you have to wait a long time for more!
Me 44
H 47
3 young adult kids
BD December 2013, left home August 2014
OW 17 years younger

Offline FaithWalkerTopic starter

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #22 on: January 07, 2018, 05:16:49 PM »
Thank you CLG, I hope that your new year has been great so far.

Yes, May will be a very busy month.  I am hoping that some of my other siblings can come on the cruise with us.  My M is going, and my B that I lived with is going along with my SIL (who is one of my best friends), my nephew 16 (who will be N17 at the time of the cruise) and my nephew 13 (who will be N14).  S12 becomes S13 in March, so the kids ages will be 13, 14, 16, 17, 18.  The kids are so looking forward to spending time together.  My B and his family are avid cruisers, and are excited to show my kids the cruising life.  My kids have never been on a cruise and my first was Dec of '16 during what would have been my 15th wedding anniversary.  I went with the above SIL and we had a wonderful time.  We did a 3 day and we are going back to this same cruise, but doing a 4 day and adding in one more stop on our cruise route.  We also plan on staying in either Mesquite or Vegas on our way out, and then going to Universal Studios afterwards.  It's a bit of a stretch financially for me, but some memories with my kids that I may not get again as S17 will have graduated and have some idea of his future.  If my other B's families come, it will be one heck of a reunion as my oldest brother has 5 kids, my 2nd oldest 4, and my younger B has 3, and they are all, with the exception of a couple of them that are younger, teenagers.  I will feel sorry for the rest of the passengers on board, lol.

The rest of the summer will be living more frugally I'm sure.  Fortunately, I have a little pop-up camper, so we can still do some cheap summer excursions.

It definitely is giving us something to look forward to.  MLCer never had the desire to go on a cruise.  Not sure if he feels the same way, but he exhibited much frustration at my B and SIL who would cruise often and they would invite us along, no pressure.  He was never interested and the kids and I would swallow down our disappointment.  He may feel differently now, as his parent's just recently got back from a cruise with her cousin and cousin's H and were sharing all about their excursions, which were out of Texas.  When I last had dinner with all of them, I shared a bit about my cruise that I had taken.  He was pretty quiet during that exchange.  It really seems like a fantastic way to have a vacation.  I didn't take the kids with me last time, but one of the things that was difficult about taking vacation's with my kids, was that it was less fun for me than it was for them.  I had to do so much planning, and then there was the stress and pressure of traveling, whether it was to the beach, or to a theme park, etc.  I had to figure out meals, etc.  All of that is virtually taken care of for you and is all included.  The kids can run around the ship and play mini golf, go down the water slide, eat at the buffet whenever they want, set up a board game in the library, and dine all together as a family with our extended's in the evening.  And there is no stress or pressure on me to entertain them.  It's a win/win!   ;D

M-39
H-42
S-17
D-15
S-12
Friends for 7 years before dating
Married for 14 years
BD 12/14/15 - 2 weeks after 14th anniversary
Divorce final 4/13/16
EA - 9/15-4/16
New GF 12/16
Engaged to her 6/17 (I found out 8/10/17)
Moved to her State 4 States away - 7/13/17
Engagement off 8/20/17
Moved back to our State 8/24/17
Joined POF within the first month back


Link to my journey: 
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9711.0

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Never become a container for bitterness.  Bitterness is a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

"Sometimes -- some things have to break all apart so better things can be built."

Offline FaithWalkerTopic starter

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #23 on: January 07, 2018, 05:19:45 PM »
Thought I would reply over here Faith 😊😂 I think I am a bit obsessed with stranger things too, we started watching more st (I think that’s what it was called) last night, where they are doing round table chats with the actors and the creators etc, was good! We watched it over 2-3 nights, that’s the bad thing with streaming, it’s over so quickly & you have to wait a long time for more!

You must have been replying while I typed.  Yes, S12 is so mad that it doesn't look like ST3 will come out until 2019.  He's bemoaning and saying "how am I supposed to wait?"  LOL

My friends and I were a bit obsessed with Twilight when it came out, having read all the books, and I reminded him that we've waited years in between that, and the Hunger Games series, not to mention Star Wars and the like.  I reminded him that there are lots of other things that crop up that make the time pass quickly.  Like, the cruise for instance!  LOL

I resisted ST at first, but when it was clear that the kids really wanted to share their enthusiasm with me, I gave in.  And of course now I understand why they were so hyped about it.
M-39
H-42
S-17
D-15
S-12
Friends for 7 years before dating
Married for 14 years
BD 12/14/15 - 2 weeks after 14th anniversary
Divorce final 4/13/16
EA - 9/15-4/16
New GF 12/16
Engaged to her 6/17 (I found out 8/10/17)
Moved to her State 4 States away - 7/13/17
Engagement off 8/20/17
Moved back to our State 8/24/17
Joined POF within the first month back


Link to my journey: 
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9711.0

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Never become a container for bitterness.  Bitterness is a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

"Sometimes -- some things have to break all apart so better things can be built."

Online CanLetGo

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #24 on: January 07, 2018, 05:41:03 PM »
I’ve never cruised, would love to one day though. Not sure about seasickness though! The big group of you will be amazing if it happens! I was the holiday organiser too, all booking, planning, be on the plane filling out 5 departure cards etc if it was international travel. H was like the kids, all organised for him. And he always worked - kids would be worried he would miss trains etc, as we would be on board and he would be out on his phone etc. A workaholic. And I bet I am now considered controlling, and as the holiday planner that forms part of his argument. He didn’t seem to enjoy them, on reflection.

Have to admit to a crush on Hopper 😂 I think it’s the obvious care he has for Joyce...I think I’m romanticising there’s someone out there like that for me. I have almost zero interaction with any males, so wouldn’t happen. I think I’m saying that meeting someone and there being a chemistry is much more appealing to me than a dating site...if that time ever comes. Not now, but maybe one day in the future 😊
Me 44
H 47
3 young adult kids
BD December 2013, left home August 2014
OW 17 years younger

Offline Shocked

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #25 on: January 07, 2018, 06:48:41 PM »
I loved your poem! Welcome to your new thread!!! 2018 must be better!!!
I care🤗
H 51
W 58
M 22 Years
2 AD both married from my first M
BD 12/15 moved out-in replay, vanisher, MOW in Atlanta
D 2/17

Offline FaithWalkerTopic starter

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #26 on: January 07, 2018, 07:23:55 PM »
CLG, they will come up with any excuse at BD.  I'm sure you were an incredible Holiday planner.  Other than Mexico on that cruise December before last, I've never traveled outside the U.S.  Bucket list for future is definitely UK, Paris, Ireland, and Australia/NZ.  I'm sure there are others.

I did get a little sick one day, and had to take some dramamine.  One of the boats stabilizers was broken though, and SIL and I ordered a pitcher of alcohol that was quite strong.  I think the combination of the two made me sick, but I survived it and other than that one morning of our day out at sea, was just fine.  I think I'll get those motion sickness wristbands for all of us, just in case, and of course keep some dramamine on hand.

I think it's obvious that Hopper cares for Joyce too.  Definitely some sort of entanglement in their history!  It's easy to romanticize things.  When I was reading the Twilight series, I thought about how much Edward seemed to care for Bella and wished my own H would show some sort of Edward caring towards me.  He would tease me that what, did I want him to bite my neck or something.  He never could get the whole romantic connection of those two.  I realize now that's just all fantasy, there's more to relationships than that, but I wanted to be cherished for crying out loud!

Yep, not interested in the whole dating sites myself.  I have an ex-boyfriend that keeps popping up every now and again, and while, quite good looking, it would be a recipe for disaster.  He knows I'm standing, but he can't help but try now and again.  Mostly, recently, he asks how I'm doing and if I've seen any movement.  And he moved across State to be closer to his kids and his ex-wife, whom I think might be an LBS herself.  I'm hoping that maybe seeing things from my perspective, is helping him with his own crisis, but who knows.  We have a lot of history, from when we were 16/17 so we joke publicly on FB about that sometimes.  We were never intimate, so I'm sure that in his mind I would be a bit of a conquest.  Not happening!

Sometimes I think about popping over to see him for a brief visit and asking him to indulge me with a selfie together, just for the purpose of making my MLCer think that he's got something to lose, but I could never do it!

I loved your poem! Welcome to your new thread!!! 2018 must be better!!!

Thank you Shocked, glad to have you aboard!
M-39
H-42
S-17
D-15
S-12
Friends for 7 years before dating
Married for 14 years
BD 12/14/15 - 2 weeks after 14th anniversary
Divorce final 4/13/16
EA - 9/15-4/16
New GF 12/16
Engaged to her 6/17 (I found out 8/10/17)
Moved to her State 4 States away - 7/13/17
Engagement off 8/20/17
Moved back to our State 8/24/17
Joined POF within the first month back


Link to my journey: 
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9711.0

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Never become a container for bitterness.  Bitterness is a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

"Sometimes -- some things have to break all apart so better things can be built."

Online CanLetGo

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #27 on: January 07, 2018, 07:40:03 PM »
Yes, at least there are options to help with motion sickness! I get it just the combination of flying/getting in elevators/then a train etc, doesn’t take much these days. Karma for having no patience for my brother having car sickness as a kid I think 🤔

Interesting that your perspective may help ex BF, it makes sense. You could be a good influence on him maybe with his interactions with ex w. I’m thinking another R would mess up my Netflix binges with my D (been up til around 2-3am, waking 11-12 - holidays are the best!), having my bed to myself, my fur baby with me...etc...life less complicated in many ways. But some male company might be nice one day...
Me 44
H 47
3 young adult kids
BD December 2013, left home August 2014
OW 17 years younger

Offline FaithWalkerTopic starter

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #28 on: January 07, 2018, 08:04:51 PM »
Sounds like your vacation time has been spent about the same as ours, time-wise.  We have to get back on track tonight.

I know you haven't been updating your thread lately, but is there no hope for reconciliation with your MLCer in your own story?

I retook the 5 Love Languages test, but took the single quiz this time, and noticed that according to that, my LL has changed.  My top is now Physical Touch.  I wonder if it is coincidence or that it really has changed based on the fact that I'm just not getting much physical touch these days, and definitely NOT in a romantic way at all.  My top LL before was words of affirmation, but I think going through this crisis has made me realize that words without action to back them up, are dead.

Anyway, just trying to get a grip on where you are at CLG. 

There are positives and negatives on both sides of the coin.  To remain single or to be in a relationship.  I guess you will reach that decision when/or if the time comes.   :)
M-39
H-42
S-17
D-15
S-12
Friends for 7 years before dating
Married for 14 years
BD 12/14/15 - 2 weeks after 14th anniversary
Divorce final 4/13/16
EA - 9/15-4/16
New GF 12/16
Engaged to her 6/17 (I found out 8/10/17)
Moved to her State 4 States away - 7/13/17
Engagement off 8/20/17
Moved back to our State 8/24/17
Joined POF within the first month back


Link to my journey: 
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9711.0

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Never become a container for bitterness.  Bitterness is a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

"Sometimes -- some things have to break all apart so better things can be built."

Online moc

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Re: Only Time Will Tell
« Reply #29 on: January 07, 2018, 08:23:54 PM »
Dear friend Faith:

I retook the 5 Love Languages test, but took the single quiz this time, and noticed that according to that, my LL has changed.  My top is now Physical Touch.  I wonder if it is coincidence or that it really has changed based on the fact that I'm just not getting much physical touch these days, and definitely NOT in a romantic way at all.  My top LL before was words of affirmation, but I think going through this crisis has made me realize that words without action to back them up, are dead.

Wow, I 100% agree with you on the LL.  I have never taken the the test but have always known that mine is Physical Touch first and Words of Affirmation second.  Crisis Queen has rarely ever touched me until recently that she is trying.  The Words of Affirmation I agree that needs to have action.  But she still tries and compliments me.

I love Stranger Things.  I am a NETFLIX junkie lately.  PM me for some great ones that are on now. 

I have only been on a cruise 1x (honeymoon with MLCer1) and it was fabulous.  We hit Puerto Rico, St Thomas, Guadalupe (magnificent secret waterfall), Caracas/Venezuela, Aruba (awesome snorkeling) and Grenada (dangerous).  I hope you have a wonderful time. 

Peace be with you.
~ avoiding the Damn Foolish Idealistic Narcissistic Crusade ~ MLC

~ MLCers: one fruitcake short of a Christmas


 

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