Author Topic: My Story New Beginnings  (Read 2098 times)

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Offline TyksTopic starter

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My Story New Beginnings
« on: December 13, 2017, 06:13:53 PM »
As I get ready to move out of the matrimonial home next Thursday I thought this was an awesome time to start a new thread full of hope.

Thank you everyone for supporting me on my journey so far. I do not know where I would be without you.

Tonight was d15's concert. She is an amazing child and very talented. This time last year I had to take an ativan to even attend. Tonight I dolled myself up and held my head high. I got there before stbxh and when I saw him walk in I promptly got myself up and went and sat down beside him.l! Good thing he did not bring his ow.... she can have him btw.

This is the first time that I have seen him since June. He looks like $h!tee. Heavy. Tired. Bloated even. He said he has had a cold for a month. He has always had a hunched back but it is more prominent now. He cannot make eye contact with me. He will talk pleasantly but only if he has something to say about daughter. I feel nothing for this person. He is not even attractive. But I think he is uncomfortable around me.

I look good! Why is it that the lbs looks so good and the mlcer looks so terrible? I even told him he looked awful lol. I can honestly say that he did me a favour. My life is amazing since he left.

My business is doing extremely well... I bought another house by myself and I am financially independant. I have awesome kids ... d18 is coming along. She will do better to not be under my wing and she will thrive. You know why? I am an awesome mother.

The only thing I thought about while sitting beside him was, wow, we sure did great raising our kids. Now it is mommy time!!!

I hate to admit it but time is definitely our friend. Our lives will be amazing whether we reconcile or not ans i truly believe now that the lbs wins in the long run :)

Previous thread: http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9279.0
« Last Edit: December 14, 2017, 05:50:21 AM by Thunder »
Me 48
Him 48
22 years together - Married 20
BD1 - August 26, 2016 - ILYBINILWY
BD 2 - August 28, 2016 - OW discovered EA - Kicked him out
D15 D18
April 2017 - Legal Separation Agreement
August 2017 - I filed for divorce
Divorce final February 12 2018

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8823.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9005.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9120.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9279.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9649.msg635725#msg635725

Offline TyksTopic starter

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #1 on: December 13, 2017, 06:15:40 PM »
PS, we are all too good for our mlcers, hence why they leave us and "trade down"
Me 48
Him 48
22 years together - Married 20
BD1 - August 26, 2016 - ILYBINILWY
BD 2 - August 28, 2016 - OW discovered EA - Kicked him out
D15 D18
April 2017 - Legal Separation Agreement
August 2017 - I filed for divorce
Divorce final February 12 2018

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8823.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9005.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9120.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9279.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9649.msg635725#msg635725

Offline Mae

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #2 on: December 13, 2017, 06:41:43 PM »
Great start to your new thread Tyks, you are fabulous and this thread can be all about that!
Me: 49
H: 40
S18, D15
Together for 19 years
BDay in 2004, 2011 and now March 5 2017
Ran away on 5 March BD
No OW
Returned home 'underdone' 1 July 2017.
Left again 22 October 2017.
H - Medicated & Zombie Like is NC

Online stillbaffled

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #3 on: December 13, 2017, 08:32:18 PM »
Well I wouldn't miss one of your threads, Tyks! 

The new house?  Awesome.

Business doing well?  Awesome.

Oldest daughter coming around?  Awesome.

You looking and sounding fabulous?  Awesome. 

Welcome to your new thread.  I'll continue going forward with you.   :)
After all, tomorrow is another day.

Online ChrissYAH

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #4 on: December 14, 2017, 12:22:15 AM »
Tykes u r such an inspiration, U just made my day  :)

Offline TyksTopic starter

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #5 on: December 14, 2017, 03:58:24 AM »
Mae, Sb thanks for coming along.

Chris, glad my post made your day.

Last night I slept better than I have in 18 months! As i am sitting here drinking coffee and reading threads I am thinking about stbxh. My thought: if I hadn't been married to him for 22 years he would just be a face in the crowd and he wouldn't even be someone that I would give a second look to. How sad is that?
Me 48
Him 48
22 years together - Married 20
BD1 - August 26, 2016 - ILYBINILWY
BD 2 - August 28, 2016 - OW discovered EA - Kicked him out
D15 D18
April 2017 - Legal Separation Agreement
August 2017 - I filed for divorce
Divorce final February 12 2018

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8823.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9005.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9120.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9279.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9649.msg635725#msg635725

Online ChrissYAH

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #6 on: December 14, 2017, 04:12:42 AM »
Mae, Sb thanks for coming along.

Chris, glad my post made your day.

Last night I slept better than I have in 18 months! As i am sitting here drinking coffee and reading threads I am thinking about stbxh. My thought: if I hadn't been married to him for 22 years he would just be a face in the crowd and he wouldn't even be someone that I would give a second look to. How sad is that?

Tyks Im sitting here with my cuppa too  :) I pray I never have to see his face in a crowd, I saw him a couple of yrs ago while out shopping  with my son, Im pretty sure he saw us, he turned his face and hurried off like we were the plague he was headed to the  gym  ::)

Offline Macy

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #7 on: December 14, 2017, 04:42:33 AM »
Tykes you are giving me hope when you say lbs look good whilst mlcers look tired and haggard. It's been one year since BD for me, and my H already moved out three times. I want to pick up the pieces and make life good for me and the kids. It's all about finding happiness and being centred, not an easy task but hopefully I will get there.

Offline TyksTopic starter

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #8 on: December 14, 2017, 04:59:47 AM »
Macy, you will get there. I kicked my h out as soon as I learned of the EA. I don't know if it was the right thing to do but i knew at the time that i needed to keep a shred of self respect. And that is all it was, a shred. He brought me to my knees like most mlcers on here. It will never happen again.

I am sure I will still cycle but for right now I am good! And I will take it because it has been a long rough road. I don't miss him anymore. He was a lump on the couch for a long time. What i miss is the life and the future that we had planned. It will come along again and it will be much better!

All of the veterans are right. As soon as we put the focus on ourselves everything starts falling into place and everything works out exactly as it is supposed to :)
Me 48
Him 48
22 years together - Married 20
BD1 - August 26, 2016 - ILYBINILWY
BD 2 - August 28, 2016 - OW discovered EA - Kicked him out
D15 D18
April 2017 - Legal Separation Agreement
August 2017 - I filed for divorce
Divorce final February 12 2018

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8823.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9005.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9120.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9279.0

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9649.msg635725#msg635725

Online CanLetGo

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Re: New Beginnings
« Reply #9 on: December 14, 2017, 05:20:40 AM »
You are awesome Tyks, that is all 😊
Me 44
H 47
3 young adult kids
BD December 2013, left home August 2014
OW 17 years younger


 

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