Author Topic: MLC Monster Head, Neck, and Body Changes  (Read 936 times)

0 Members and 1 Guest are viewing this topic.

Offline VelikaTopic starter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2523
  • Gender: Female
MLC Monster Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« on: February 07, 2018, 11:32:35 PM »
My young son told me last night that his dad looks different. He told me, "His eyes are sunken in and his head and neck have gotten wider." He has commented before that his dad has also gained weight.

I had noticed an odd phenomenon where my ex, Ben Affleck, and Dean from "Tori and Dean" series (detailed in another thread, as I feel that Dean has whatever we are describing here) all have an uncannily similar "look." I have seen this in other celebrities we might suspect as being MLC as well. There is an odd "widening."

I have had the uncanny sensation at times that I am watching something like a bizarre natural phenomenon. Like I am literally watching one type of being morph into another. And when I look at the images of these men, I feel that oddly they are morphing into the same type of thing.

What could possibly cause these men to somehow "widen"? I mean, what causes your skull and neck and eye shape to change so that even a child can notice it? This isn't just about weight gain or getting fat. There is something very distinct to the "look."

Could an atrophying/shrinking brain cause this phenomenon?

Anyhow, I am interested to hear your thoughts.

« Last Edit: February 12, 2018, 06:12:17 AM by OldPilot »

Offline moc

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 675
  • Gender: Male
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #1 on: February 08, 2018, 12:09:43 AM »
Velika, I don't know why but, I have to agree with the appearance changes in the MLCer.  My wife as of recent has those "sunken eyes" and neck/head seems bigger also.  I have seen that she has also gained weight mostly in the face and now I can see the light fuzz of a mustache and beard on her.  I am betting hormone changes during MLC have much of a greater cause to this.  At least that is my guess.  Maybe the "eat" to stave off the depression, boredom, etc. as "running behaviors" are more inclined to other addictions or abuses (alcohol, drugs, food, etc.).
M: 47
W: 45
S15 & S11 [from MLCer1]
BD#1: 9/2017
BD#2: 11/2017
no D filed, not seeking action at this time
Separated: 12/2017
OM: EAs up to at least 5 now.  Not sure on PAs.

Offline Mortesbride

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 940
  • Gender: Female
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #2 on: February 08, 2018, 06:56:12 AM »
I would think the widening affect is gaining weight in the face.

If there were to be any change to the skull due to the brain atrophying or shrinking it certainly wouldn't get bigger...

If the brain were to shrink I would imagine your body would produce fluid to surround and cushion it...otherwise it would be dangerous and slapping around in your head.

If you notice a young man say 17-20 they still look very boyish...and then due to hormones etc from about 24-26 they 'get more manly'. I would think the changes you are seeing are your husband going from a more athletic looking younger man to a 'softer' older man. No doubt due to hormone fluctuation, change in facial hair distribution, skin tone, and fat deposits in the face and neck.

Offline Thunder

  • Moderator
  • *
  • Posts: 15484
  • Gender: Female
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #3 on: February 08, 2018, 07:12:53 AM »
Mine seem to get a thinner neck, but I'm thinking it was from weight loss.
I did see a lot of aging in his face, but then I suppose the stress of it all did that.
With her permission, a quote from a recovered MLCer: 
From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did.

Offline Nas

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1131
  • Gender: Female
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #4 on: February 08, 2018, 07:22:05 AM »
I recently saw a picture of my H for the first time in a year and a half.  He had gained a lot of weight the last time I saw him, in 2016.  In the recent picture, his face did look wider.  He still had fairly dark empty eyes, despite his big goofy teenage grin.

I often see Ben Affleck and think he looks an awful lot like my H in the way his eyes have darkened and appear empty and he looks puffy and heavier.
Married 8 years at BD, together 16.
BD March 2015
H moved out July 2015
I found out about OW March 2016 (She went to high school with H, long distance EA since September 2014, became PA November 2015)
H moved 1100 miles to live with OW June 2016
I was diagnosed with advanced breast cancer June 2017
H became a vanisher

Offline dogwalker

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 438
  • Gender: Male
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #5 on: February 08, 2018, 07:24:16 AM »
I saw pictures of my W while having a practise make over for the S27 wedding. The eyes have defo sunk into her head but they have also dropped at the side too.

Offline FamilyIsMyGoal

  • Sr. Member
  • ****
  • Posts: 254
  • Gender: Female
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #6 on: February 08, 2018, 07:30:43 AM »
I haven't seen my H in several months, but someone saw him recently and said he looks terrible.  Gaunt and dark.  I know he has lost some weight.  He has also been drinking a lot (maybe Ben Affleck's problem too?)   I think there is something to what you are all saying.  This is a more powerful force than I ever knew!
Divorce Bomb August 6, 2017
Married 19 years
Together 22 years
Physically separated - he's 15 miles away
Two Teenage boys
Me: 54
H 58
OW? I don't know - probably plural

Offline Nas

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 1131
  • Gender: Female
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #7 on: February 08, 2018, 07:42:57 AM »
I saw pictures of my W while having a practise make over for the S27 wedding. The eyes have defo sunk into her head but they have also dropped at the side too.


To be fair, I have seen these kind of changes in myself as well over the last few years.  Could be my genetics/normal aging or could be a result of the stress of H's pre-BD changes and the stress since BD.
Married 8 years at BD, together 16.
BD March 2015
H moved out July 2015
I found out about OW March 2016 (She went to high school with H, long distance EA since September 2014, became PA November 2015)
H moved 1100 miles to live with OW June 2016
I was diagnosed with advanced breast cancer June 2017
H became a vanisher

Offline VelikaTopic starter

  • Hero Member
  • *****
  • Posts: 2523
  • Gender: Female
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #8 on: February 08, 2018, 08:17:52 AM »
Yes, but my ex had been various range of weight before, and this is distinct. There is a specific "look" to this, at least this thing that my ex seems to have, and I suspect the other men I mentioned have.

My dad, for example, is much older than my ex and he has never had this look. My former FIL also never had this look; in fact, pre-MLC I would have assumed my ex would age like his dad. The person who does have this look is my former MIL, who also has extremely sunken eyes.

I would say the "look" arc that Ben Affleck has followed — including expression and appearance of eyes — is nearly identical to my ex, on a similar timeline. My ex does not have the same genetic background as Ben Affleck or even very similar coloring, and yet they have both morphed into a similar, peculiar "type."

Offline Anjae

  • Subscriber, 12 Month
  • *
  • Posts: 13312
  • Gender: Female
Re: Head, Neck, and Body Changes
« Reply #9 on: February 08, 2018, 03:26:24 PM »
Mr J also has that look - I saw it myself live a couple of weeks ago. It is the drinking, not sleeping and MLC lifestyle stress combined.

Mid 2009 Mr J had lost a lot of weight (his normal self his slender), looked like someone out of a concentration camp. Then, he become the bloated  weird person he has been since.

Mr J looks terrible, and had looked in years, yet, his MLC friends, OW2 and pretty much everyone else thinks he looks great.

Then again, pretty much everyone but myself then a friend that is having a MLC that his MLC self pictures on FB look great and that friend looks handsome. He doesn't. He looks like a junkie.

Stayed used to talk a lot of how her husband's looks changed while deep in crisis, then, as the crisis start to wear off, how he went back to his normal looks.


Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)


 

Legal Disclaimer
The information contained within The Hero's Spouse website family (www.midlifecrisismarriageadvocate.com, http://theherosspouse.com and associated subdomains), (collectively 'website') is provided as general information and is not intended to be a substitute for professional legal, medical or mental health advice or treatment for specific medical conditions. The Hero's Spouse cannot be held responsible for the use of the information provided. The Hero's Spouse recommends that you consult a trained medical or mental health professional before making any decision regarding treatment of yourself or others. The Hero's Spouse recommends that you consult a legal professional for specific legal advice.
Any information, stories, examples, articles, or testimonials on this website do not constitute a guarantee, or prediction regarding the outcome of an individual situation. Reading and/or posting at this website does not constitute a professional relationship between you and the website author, volunteer moderators or mentors or other community members. The moderators and mentors are peer-volunteers, and not functioning in a professional capacity and are therefore offering support and advice based solely upon their own experience and not upon legal, medical, or mental health training.
This disclaimer is also included in the Forum's Registration Agreement.