Author Topic: My Story The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest  (Read 2237 times)

Online Mortesbride

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My Story Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #130 on: May 16, 2018, 11:40:35 AM »
Yeah...I like to think of it as murder. Beast murdered it.

Anyway glad to see about the house....are you relying on the tied up money to pay for it? There isn't a possibility for MLCer to make your buying the house impossible is there?

Offline KeepItTogether

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #131 on: May 16, 2018, 11:45:21 AM »
What???? A converted chapel? Oh Treasur I am in love with that idea. I am sure it is just amazing!

XH is throwing a fit bc he got exactly what he asked for....and is still miserable. I agree, it is hard to love the monster.  Very hard indeed.

I was laughing so hard when you gave that wonderful description of how your L responded to XH and actually read it in a very low key English accent. Love it!

Good wolf wins as usual.
Me 46
H 45
S11
BD 5/16
H Moved out 6/16
OW--yes. Worked for H. EA turned into PA while I was in chemo.

Offline stillbaffled

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #132 on: May 16, 2018, 06:46:47 PM »
Congratulations on what sounds like a very charming new house!  Like Milly, I'll enjoy hearing about its layout. 

Your MLCer considering if he had a vocation to be a vicar!!?   :o   You're right .....not enough emojis for that! 

I agree with your statement that when someone in RL really "gets" it, it is very consoling indeed. 

Seems the good wolf is very active right now!   :)
After all, tomorrow is another day.
Together 16 years - married 6
BD - 1/1/16
His divorce final 7/16
Married OW - 7/17
a consistent semi-vanisher in the same small town

Offline FaithWalker

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #133 on: May 16, 2018, 08:29:21 PM »
All caught up Treasur!

Fingers crossed for you on the chapel/house!
M-39
H-42
S-17
D-15
S-12
Friends for 7 years before dating
Married for 14 years
BD 12/14/15 - 2 weeks after 14th anniversary
Divorce final 4/13/16
EA - 9/15-4/16
New GF 12/16
Engaged to her 6/17 (I found out 8/10/17)
Moved to her State 4 States away - 7/13/17
Engagement off 8/20/17
Moved back to our State 8/24/17
Joined POF within the first month back


Link to my journey: 
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9907.0#new

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass... it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Never become a container for bitterness.  Bitterness is a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

"Sometimes -- some things have to break all apart so better things can be built."

Online TreasurTopic starter

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #134 on: May 16, 2018, 11:40:36 PM »
Bad Wolf...put back in box by grown-up responses from my L and me, both very English with a hidden sub-text of 'you're an idiot'. His reply, forced to fake grown-up as everything was cc'd to his L, was sent at 1am so at least I know he's not sleeping well bwahahaha  ;). I slept like a baby and woke up for the first time in ages not thinking about either XH or this whole mess, but about the new house, work and things I need to do to get things done.

The chapel was built in 1908, with a memorial plaque to young men from the village killed in the 1914-1918 war, and converted about 20 years ago. It is a wooden-clad building, painted black with a white trim and has three big church-style windows running along each side so full of light. You enter through the original wooden door, set centrally, into a small hall with a central corridor separating two guest bedrooms and a bathroom and storage cupboard. The door at the end of the corridor opens into the main open plan living space, painted cream with a cross-beam holding central light fittings, a vaulted ceiling and an inset square window high up at the end of the room. The open-plan kitchen and another bathroom are at the far end, with french doors opening out onto a small paved courtyard which is enclosed by fencing and leads to a separate small annexe space which will be my new work space. It has french doors too, so again full of light, and is on the same zoned tiled underfloor heating system as the rest of the chapel. Are you with me so far, standing in the little courtyard in the sun? If you turn around now to face back into the main living area, you will see stairs and an open gallery at the other end - above the guest bedrooms - which leads to the main bedroom built into the eaves at the front of the chapel like a loft space. Room for a bed and bedside tables, but storage space will need to be built into the quite sharply-angled eaves. (Probably need to make sure my next lover is less than 6' or likes walking with curved shoulders!) So, although there is work to do on built-in storage, cupboards painted the same colour as the walls, and later projects to enjoy planning like adding a woodturning stove and updating the kitchen, it is all perfectly move in-able as it is because it has been rented out for many years. I have already started imagining my furniture there - which is all shabby chic and quite unusual, mostly old French pieces - and even mentally started hanging pictures!

To make this all happen, I just have a long to do list of practical stuff and it is a prod from the universe to finish getting rid of bits of my old life and MLC fallout which hurt too much to do for quite a while, including things from my parents' house. There is nothing XH can do legally or financially to derail it, and I just need to keep any new emotional nonsense he brings (as he might, we all know) out of my head and far away.

I'm on a relatively short deadline now, probably about 3 months, to pick out a few treasures to keep but clean the decks of things I no longer need or want. Probably no bad thing at all. Ironically, H as was would love the old chapel but I have no intention of even telling him when I move and he will never see it. I was always good at finding unusual houses and turning them into unusual but welcoming homes; his loss and, if he stays with ow and stops mooching off his auntie on her expensive London houseboat, he'll get to live in a modern shoebox house on a provincial purpose-built housing estate while I wake up to vaulted ceilings dappled with sunlight and take my morning coffee out to my little courtyard sun trap. It feels good to be pushing towards a space which has no MLC in it and no memories of the grief and chaos. Just full of light and promise. To be honest, I think I deserve the little chapel by the sea now and I hope that God agrees with me!

T: 18  M: 12 (at BD)
No kids.
BD Oct 15. OW since Apr 16?
H filed Jan 17. Divorced April 18

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"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

Offline UrsaMajor

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #135 on: May 17, 2018, 01:56:49 AM »
The new place sounds simply divine (pun intended)

and xH wanting to be a Vicar?


Me - 54
MLC - 47
Together 20 years - Married for 17 at separation
S - 11
D - 7
2 Canines (each of us has one)
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold and separated - March 2016
Mid-Lifer is initiating D

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A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

Online Mortesbride

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #136 on: May 17, 2018, 02:36:35 AM »
Well I think it is a gift basket from the Karma bus. They seem to be coming round lately. Fingers crossed I am on the list.  ;)

Online TreasurTopic starter

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #137 on: May 17, 2018, 02:45:58 AM »
Love that, UM  ;D He was actually ordained as a church elder...had the cassock and full kit...could conduct everything bar weddings and funerals ha ha. Maybe he's upgraded and is planning on conducting his next wedding  ::) although last thing I heard he no longer believes in God...or more accurate said God doesn't believe in him. I'm sure God is at least raising a quizzical eyebrow and saying "really? more mess?". I wonder if he still has the cassock? Ah well, I never fancied being a vicar's wife in a grotty inner-city parish so all good.

And proving that XH is an MLC cheese brain and/or his L is an idiot who has bought his Mr Sadz story...got an email from her snottily (in L language) saying she had already confirmed the bank details to my L on Friday...blah blah..see attached. She had...but a completely different set of bank details than XH confirmed to me this morning at 1am ::). Meanwhile my L's assistant, about to send the payment to the details XH provided, emailed me to check I was ok to pay the bank fee of £30. Meanwhile - on the sunny side of the street - I am getting other emails about the new house purchase from a different L. Amazing how an MLCer can complicate the simplest thing.  ::)

Although my L, me and her assistant are all a bit bored of being the only grown-ups standing, my Good Clear Wolf (with a tiny dollop of Bad Wolf Sarcasm) replied to his L ccing XH and my L/assistant saying:

"Thank you, XH's L. As you can see from my last email, although Mr T gave different instructions from you, I have told my L to use the details you provided and trust that any further confusion will be resolved between you and Mr T without my or my L's involvement. (Translation from English L to human..."you are all idiots, now go away and fight amongst yourselves")

I have also agreed to pay the fee to get this actioned promptly. (Translation "because I am a sane adult") It would be great if, in return, you could encourage your client to communicate by email with me as he undertook to do to efficiently and respectfully address the last bits of administration that come with unpicking a shared life in these circumstances. (Translation "your client is an unreasonable dishonest idiot and needs a L'ly kick to understand the consequences of continuing to not meet his obligations and acting like a child")

Thank you. (Translation "now f**k off and stop emailing me because you are enabling your client's avoidance and insanity")

Treasur"


They are all f**kwits on XH's side of the street and I'm happy to leave them to it. Amazing that XH is still holding down a job and I hope that psycho ow is good at detailed life admin and reminds him to turn up at his next wedding ha ha! But my side of the street is sane, sunny and simplified with bubbles of excitement and freedom from batsnot bonkers  :)

And I'm happy to share the karma bus, Morte...think you are due for a change in the tide too right?
« Last Edit: May 17, 2018, 02:49:31 AM by Treasur »
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD)
No kids.
BD Oct 15. OW since Apr 16?
H filed Jan 17. Divorced April 18

Grateful for any appearance of the tiny karma bus  
"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

Online Mortesbride

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #138 on: May 17, 2018, 03:26:12 AM »
We are currently experiencing an increase in coastal swells at the moment...Financial Hurricane MIL is just off the coast and ready to hit the shores...

But LBS residence are well stocked, prepared, and have battened down the hatches waiting for the storm to hit. The expectation is that after the storm passes, there should be cool clear financially independent waters ahead with the normal ups and downs expected.  8)

Online TreasurTopic starter

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Re: The Good Wolf and the Treasure Chest
« Reply #139 on: May 17, 2018, 03:35:57 AM »
Ah, Hurricane MiL...will nip over to your thread to see the update...presumably Gusty Beast Winds will be blowing too but hopefully in her direction not yours!
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD)
No kids.
BD Oct 15. OW since Apr 16?
H filed Jan 17. Divorced April 18

Grateful for any appearance of the tiny karma bus  
"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

 

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