JohnnyBravo & UrsaMajor - yes, that is the truth. Especially when the people who seem to want to give advice are like my toxic aunt, whose selections have often been less than stellar. LOL. I am still not sure how she landed my uncle.
UrsaMajor - I forgot about Mortesbride having that license. LOL. Okay. Aisle seat and yes, you may look out the window. Treasur - LOL - sure, bring a book.
And, it seems we have an HS Cultural Director now - Hahaha. JohnnyBravo, do you require a seat on this bus as well? Or as the Cultural Director will you also be acting as tour guide? So far, I will admit your selections have been rather amusing. LOL.
I forced myself to get myself out of bed and out the door at an early hour. The weather was already sunny and warm, well, winter warm and it is sounding like the calm before the storm. They keep changing the forecast. S is on call for plowing again although they don't anticipate the snow being the type that can't be kept up with and the snowfall for my area is not outrageous. They are more concerned about ice. So, with that in mind, I decided I should take my sister up on her offer to walk and then I would follow her to the mall, yet again to help her with her final area rug selection. I told her on the phone this morning, I was prepared today for any Xh sightings, just in case.
We walked 3.5 miles on the one path, which was incredibly icy this morning, as it was thawing. But, it was still lovely. I had opted to answer the doctor's office and do a telephone visit today since we were just going over numbers. I laughed when the phone rang and the nurse was on the line. She makes me laugh every time I encounter her. She is no nonsense and has a funny sense of humor. She said "girl, what in the he!! is going on with you"? Yah, I know. We had a good chat and I was on the phone with the PA shortly after that. This PA, I have been seeing for the past few years in that office, which I have been going to since I was in college. The PA is the reason I finally got to the bottom of all the pain I was in and I like her. She is a spitfire and I don't mind when she even is direct with me. She is not unkind and will laugh at things like saying she has a terrible time with sweets. She doesn't try to make you feel bad about being human. So, I was waiting to hear her response to those dreaded numbers.
She had my charts from the other doctors I have seen this past month - follow ups and routine checks, so she saw my BP is good and I haven't somehow gained tons of weight, etc. My B12 is where it needs to be finally and leveled back out. But the other numbers shocked her. Her first question was "what has changed the past 6 months, because this makes no sense to see such a spike in your lipids, etc". When I said I was not being mindful of my diet and exercise, she asked specifically what I meant. She paused and asked me something else that I hadn't considered, but should know. She asked if my stress level has been way above normal. Gee, perhaps?
The more we talked, the more upset I was with myself. If I wanted to see where this lack of self-care has gotten me it was in my bloodwork. She said she suspects, knowing me, I have not been ignoring my diet and getting some exercise, but it is probably that I have been ignoring that need to take time for me and doing what I had done in the past. She commented the only time that my numbers were like this were back when I was going through the divorce. It was this hiccup in my charts. And she is right.
It scared me, TBH to have her put it that way. The last time I really took time for myself was this summer on any regular basis. There have been no morning stretches. No walks - at least like the one's I so craved. I haven't been driving on backroads much. The last real relaxing moment I had was back in July when I had company. I have been on this whirlwind tour of trying to juggle it all and make sure everyone's needs are met. I forgot one ball in the mix - the one that is my part of the equation.
So after the first leg of our walk, I went with my sister to meet up with my parents. She was supposed to have coffee with them this morning and drop something off to them. I tagged along. My M was shocked I was there, as I hadn't mentioned it to her. My sister right away said "I didn't know MD had to clear her schedule with everyone". I don't think my M liked that very well. My sister wasn't mean about it, but she told me later that she sees now that she needs to pick up the slack a bit and help out more.
After having coffee we went for a second walk, down the same trail, but the opposite direction. We have never been down that part of the trail. It was so lovely and quieter on that part of the path. We finished with having walked nearly 7 miles total. I followed her to the mall and we had a quick lunch. I mentioned to her that I was sort of laughing at my PA as she had made a suggestion to me which sort of made me laugh. She wants me to drink a small glass of red wine a couple of times a week and to do so with strict instructions. I am to tell my family to leave me alone for at least half an hour and to just shut the world out and to enjoy that glass of wine. I knew what she was getting at and she is right.
So, the deal is, I am to have bloodwork done in 6 months and make changes - mainly go back to taking better care of myself. If I notice any concerning changes, then to call her, but until then, I can avoid medications.
Now if only, I could get some other people to get on board with this and let me actually have time to myself. Not to be pulling at me and not hearing me express what I need. Sigh.
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She's My Kind of Rain