[megogirl]

he compared those horrible years to when  you are a nasty ugly teenager and you love your parents BUT you act like an obnoxious brat...and you don't want to be rude and annoyed all the time but you just can't stop yourself, then after you feel guilty and when you get older and mature out of that stage you feel embarrassed at your teenage behavior.  You can't believe you were ever that person...for my H that is how he feels about his MLC years.

Jojojo....RCR echoes your sentiments EXACTLY.

She compares MLC to the teenage years and asks of us, "How is this any more tumultuous?" 

That was never lost on me.  That someday, things will be far, far different (S16's wedding? Our first grandchild, maybe?)

Keep the faith xxx

[akjomsviking]

Wow it is creepy how similar all of these are....the really funny ones get me even though my own D was a few years ago.

Mine were:

ILYBINILWY (of course)

We've grown apart (after she spent as much time as humanly possible out of the house doing her own thing)

You don't like to do <random recreational activity> as much as I do.  <-- note this doesn't mean we didn't like to do the same things.  I didn't like to do them *as much* as her.   

You've never really loved me

I'm not attracted to you

I know you've changed and become this amazing person, but I'm afraid if I stay you'll just regress

Our marriage is too easy

You do lots of things around the house, but you didn't used to

You are boring

You're too emotional

I'm just not happy (this repeated ad nauseam in every conversation)

What was weird is how she was on this mental/emotional loop.  By the time we finally physically separated and started the divorce, I could honestly predict what she was going to say in any conversation with nearly 100% accuracy.  It was just the same thing, over and over. 

[Disillusioned]

Akjoms-  I've noticed the same thing! 
It's like they've memorized something. My MLCW says the same phrases over and over and over again. Like they've written down a list, commited every injustice to memory, and drag it out at every chance.   Every conversation is peppered with the same exact comments. The only twist is, she started parroting back some of the things that I would say! It was like talking to myself. It is truly a bizarre situation. Sorry you had to go through it

[Skates]

The whole "I am not happy" this is freaking annoying.  If you aren't happy is it really directly because of your spouse?  When you wake up in the morning and go about your day does your wife or husband do so many things that are so bad that it makes you unhappy.  Do they insult you or disrespect you or say or do mean things.  No they don't, with mine she kept saying the "you don't make me happy" thing all the time but she could never really give me an example of why.  If she did it was just stupid like "You always re-arrange the dishwasher after i put things in it".  I just think to myself, really - does re-arranging so you can add more dishes really cause someone to be so unhappy that they want a divorce?  Its just so stupid.  SO STUPID.  Mine did all kinds of things like trying to start a new career and doing a lot more things for herself.  In therapy she says things like i am a lot happier now.  And i just sit there thinking, if it has nothing to do with me that you are getting "Happier" because you are doing things for yourself....  Then how was it my fault that you got unhappy?  its so aggravating!.

[megogirl]

Akj....me too!  I've also gotten:

"You are boring."

"We've grown apart." (although I also got the bonus, "You either grow together.....or grow apart."

and the ever-famous, "I AM NOT HAPPY!"

I do take some sense of solace in knowing that others have heard the exact. same. things.

[ChrissYAH]

I got 'I love u as the mother of my children' which is a variation of ILYBINILWY, yes they're not happy! poor them! they make it everything is about THEM, well he took off married ow and is STILL not happy and STILL complaining about having no money, maybe its the fact that she makes him pay rent ahhaaa classic!

[Believer]

The following are the most recent he’s told me ... as he prepares to marry the OW in two months...oh and we’re almost 10 years into MLC world 

I care very much about you and what happens to you, although I understand my actions may suggest otherwise 

Not talking to you just doesn’t seem real so I’m not accepting that 

There will always be a spot in my heart for you don't ever think otherwise regardless of how I am 

Don't turn your phone off, you never know when I may call just to say hi 

[megogirl]

'I love u as the mother of my children' which is a variation of ILYBINILWY

HOLY $h!te....I got that exact. same. thing.

I've never mentioned that phrase before here, because you are the *very first person* I've ever seen to echo it....so thank you, I suppose? (or, thank him? lol)

[ChrissYAH]

The following are the most recent he’s told me ... as he prepares to marry the OW in two months...oh and we’re almost 10 years into MLC world 

I care very much about you and what happens to you, although I understand my actions may suggest otherwise 

Not talking to you just doesn’t seem real so I’m not accepting that 

There will always be a spot in my heart for you don't ever think otherwise regardless of how I am 

Don't turn your phone off, you never know when I may call just to say hi 

The last one!! omg ahahhaa, yes Im sure u sit at the edge of your seat awaiting the 'hi call'

[Believer]

ChrissYAH,

Yes, most certainly on the edge of my seat  LOL !!!