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Author Topic: My Story I've seen better days

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My Story I've seen better days
#150: February 10, 2023, 02:23:29 AM
I actually think that this is exactly what she wants you to do.  The more nodding and silence she receives from you, the more she might speak and, ironically, feel heard.  She's probably aware of how much you still love her dad and how that leads you to sometimes protect his reputation? and their relationship from the consequences of his actions.

I think that it's nice that you invited H to this dinner tonight for D24.  I wonder if it might have been better coming from D24 because she was the one who wanted him there? 
You took the words out of my GIF/mouth. D24 is .... well .... 24. If she wants her F there, she is more than capable of inviting him and letting you know about it, right? From over here in the Schnitzel corner, they (D22 & D24) know that you  are open to reconciliation so would not have a major case of chapped "sit bones"  if he were to be invited... assuming he would not show up with OW at least.

I think you have done a fabulous job of paving the way for H and as such, I think you can be confident that he knows you are a friendly, trustworthy, soft place to land that he chooses not to use at the moment.  . Until that changes, keep taking deep breaths and letting the things that need to fall apart do so.
and remember the LBS Mantra - " I am NOT responsible for the actions of others nor the consequences those actions engender."  also known as  "Not my circus, not my monkeys."  Both of your daughters are old enough to make their own way forward with ttheir father on their terms

You've got this Ever.  I hope the dinner celebration is going super well and you are having a fab time

As your post was written at 02:00, I hope that everything is going or went well!

Oh, and by the way, you need a new thread!
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« Last Edit: February 10, 2023, 02:25:05 AM by UrsaMajor »
Me - 59, xW - 51
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 15, D - 12
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019
Moved on in life

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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
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I've seen better days
#151: February 11, 2023, 10:50:10 PM
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M: 52 (48 @ BD)
H: 54 (51 @ BD)
Married 20yrs, together 23yrs
D: 23 (19 @ BD)
D: 21 (17 @ BD)
'Extra D': 21 (17 @ BD)
BD (that I didn't recognise as such) Easter 2018
BD 9th Sep 2018
OW (45, now 49) - he (supposedly) met her in the pub a week before BD, told me about her a week after BD. Thinks 'their planets have collided' because 'their eyes met across the room' and they had an 'instant connection'. Lives with her. Is building a life with her.
Jun 20: H plans to buy a block of land and build a house with her (never happens).
May 22: Movement... (likely T&G? Time will tell I guess)


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