Bravo, 5!
You shared how you responded and were feeling during and after the first convo with him in almost 2 years. Your post focused on you! You did mention your H’s manner of communication, but only the observable facts.
You did not focus on speculating where he is in crisis, nor did you try to name and classify the encounter as a ‘touch and go,’ ‘the beginning of reconnection,’ ‘is he going to be a clinger now?’ or whatever. I think the use of that kind of terminology can generate unhelpful expectations in LBS, by inserting in her mind a mental flow chart of ‘touch and go’ —> ‘reconnection’ —> ‘reconciliation.’ Staying away from these unhelpful thoughts highlights how far you have come in detachment and healing. Good for you!
If you don’t mind me sharing my experience, I can tell you that it took me quite a bit longer than you not to read the tea leaves/speculate/prognosticate every interaction with my H…
It’s a kind of test for LBS’s detachment and where her focus is, depending on how much/little LBS speculates on the meaning of interactions with MLCer or their behaviour, IMHO.
Cheers!