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Author Topic: My Story SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH

W
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My Story SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
OP: October 04, 2021, 12:19:19 PM
Yesterday was half marathon #25. The morning started with a thick fog which made driving difficult. I exited the fog after some time and drove into the sun as it rose over the Atlantic Ocean and it's rays were blinding as it covered the roadway in yellow and just as thick as the gray fog.

I finally arrived at the beach and was met by a red 🦊 which is supposed to be good luck. Well IDK about yesterday.

The race started at 9am. I think I've picked up a lot of bad habits running by myself. Maybe I need to start running listening to music again.

This race had official pacers and that distracted me. Instead of running my race I was too focused on the pacers I think. This was my first organized half marathon since March 2020.

The humidity was really bad and the stations only offered water which did not help as Gatorade would have been more beneficial on a day like yesterday. I developed leg cramps around mile 11 as dehydration was probably setting in.

There was no shade on this course and the sun was booming. It's funny, the temps were probably only 75 degrees and I still got a new layer of color. I did see many people walking towards the end so I know I was not the only one impacted by the conditions.

I was all kinds of sore and tired afterwards and that was a bit unusual for a half marathon. I think I maybe out of race shape, which is kind of foolish, since I'm only competing against myself. I definitely came out of the gate too fast as I really ran well during the first 4 miles.

The AC Marathon is in 2 weeks and my long runs during training have not been that great so IDK. Yesterday certainly didn't give me any encouragement for the marathon. I will definitely have to use a different approach for that one.

The 2022 London Marathon Lottery opened up this week. It's only open for 5 days. So I filled out my ballot and I had to put down American. However it then asked me to specify my ethnicity.

So the only two options were Irish and Other. LOL, those British ! What are they up to with that question ? That answer can go either way. Are they going to favor those with Irish descent or punish them, lol. Is this an Irish need not apply Marathon ?

That drawing is not until February so we shall see what the Brits are up to in due time.

In other news, her typical cycles are afoot as she is locking the boys down again and S18 has gone along with her program which leads me to conclude that his progress was just an illusion.
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SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
#1: October 04, 2021, 04:36:03 PM
Found you Watcher.

I am behind with your story but I am with you now so that’s the main thing.

Glad you are still running. I’ve missed you.
Rose 🌹
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Married 15+ years with 2 children
BD1 - 2016
BD2 - 2017
BD3 - Sept 2019
MOW Mar 2016-Jan 2018
OW2 - Feb 2019, age 30
H left home Oct 2017 to stay with his parents
Bought a family Puppy mid 2018 - referred to as ‘P’

Link to advice by my mentor, Phoenix, on what to tell the children about H leaving - reply #33 (it had a glitch)
https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9313.30

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SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
#2: October 04, 2021, 08:52:07 PM
Attaching
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Survival Instructions for Newbies

The Apology Every LBS Deserves

My Journey

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass - it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Don't become a container for bitterness.  It's a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

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SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
#3: October 05, 2021, 01:09:54 AM
Coming along for the next installment of ....

"Marathon Man?"

I hope that S18 can rebel a bit and break free...
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Me - 58, xW - 50
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 14, D - 10
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

Survival Instructions for Newbies
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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

R
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SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
#4: October 06, 2021, 01:16:00 AM
Glad to hear from you again, Watcher. I was not surprised and was amused at you competing differently due to competing with the pacers. Yes, weather and crowds can tremendously change how a run feels and goes.
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T
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SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
#5: October 06, 2021, 09:15:15 AM
I envy those that can run. I can walk fast, but that is it! Attaching to follow :)
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H-54 W-58  M 7/6/91 Kids d-30 s-28 d-14 (dies 2009)
2013- moments of disconnect start
Aug 2016 promotion requires travel   
Oct 2017-total disconnect
Jan 2018- moved out H
Mar 2018- BD1 found old phone 3 EA ‘17-H in therapy
EA ow1-49,  EA-ow2 57, (EA- ow3-58 not reciprocated)
Sept ‘18 -2nd Home in new state H new job
Oct 2018-H moves home
Oct 2020 BD2 does not return home from B trip
Nov 2020 H move to 2nd home in other state OW4
Div filed-Dec ‘20   Div final-Feb ‘21
Oct 2021- XH moves in OW4
https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=11796.

W
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SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
#6: October 07, 2021, 05:31:34 AM
Hi Rose, FaithWalker, UrsaMajor, Reinventing, Tornup.

Well I noticed during my past 2 races that I'm also distracted by runners having conversations so I need to start listening to music again to drown it out. These two guys were droning on and on about work and IDK if they lost me or I lost them but I knew it wasn't going to work out.

During the prior 10K I had two women discussing this romance novel. It was about a man who loved a woman, who married another man. Then the husband died, she moved away, and that stalker man, because that it what he really is ladies, spent his life looking for his lost love. Just wow.

Luckily that was a 5k/10k combo and they were running the 5k and we went our separate ways, hahaha. Throw in those pacers during the half marathon and I was a mess, lol.

I have run 515 miles for this upcoming marathon. I had run 800 miles prior to the 2020 marathon and only 300 miles prior to the 2019 marathon so I should be ok but I'm not feeling to sure of myself yet.

So yesterday S18 did goto his dermatologist appointment in the morning. He also went for his lab work last week. He is also no longer pursuing his driver's license as he gave me every 'my dog ate my homework' excuse in the book a few weeks ago.

He texted me wanting to know where I was at as I must have been running late. Then when I arrived I had to wait 15 minutes for him since his mom was home. Games. He gets in the car and tells me his mom had him wear pants instead of shorts and that was the delay. Control.

The appointment went fine and this is month #4 of treatment so there should be a November visit and a December review and then we will see what happens next. We should be done. It's only a 5 month treatment plan.

I took him back home because he has online courses and we had to wait for his mom to come home to let him in the house. Control. Now she probably had taken S21 to college since he was not home. She pulled up behind my car and I was like, you gotta go, lol. She never gets out of her car anyway.

I went to kickboxing later in the afternoon and we had made plans for dinner afterwards. Well he texted me after I got out of class and canceled because she was going to make dinner. It's funny because he canceled for himself but did not know if that meant S21 would also cancel.

He has a very odd way of phrasing his texts with me so my replies are usually just an, ok no problem, since I know he is under duress.

So the high mania of late August has subsided and we are in angry vindictive mode which is probably depression I guess or she could be just a b!tch. ::)

When he canceled his DMV appointment a few weeks ago I realized that her cycles are never going to end. It's been 6+ years of the same cycling. So the boys will need a father again when she is back in mania and who knows when that will be.

S18 next appointment is November 10th so I don't expect to hear from him until then and hopefully we can at least finish his treatment.

Enjoy your day everyone
Thank you

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#7: October 08, 2021, 12:11:37 PM
Along for the run.
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"I'm slowly learning to expect nothing and appreciate everything."

Together 28 years, married 27. Two adult kids, ours

BD #1: 2016 - EA  |  BD #2: 2018 - FA

W moved out - June 2019 | OM#3 - July 2019
W asks for divorce - August 2019 | Divorce final - September 2019 | Moving on

My thread: https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=11537.new#new

New Here? Read this! http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=1149.0

W
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SOMEWHERE ON A BEACH
#8: October 11, 2021, 02:49:29 PM
Hi PJ.

No running for me this weekend as I rested. It was actually nice to have 2 whole days of not feeling any kind of soreness. Unfortunately I ate 3 donuts yesterday so I was back in the gym this morning and lost two of them. Two off days in a row is the max.

I'm trying not to feel too rested nor too tired for the marathon on Sunday.  Three more days this week at Kickboxing where I try to focus just on my chest, arms and abs while leaving my legs alone.

My friend believes this one instructor does not like men however I'm beginning to think she doesn't like women. Today I was the only man in the class so I was thinking would she really be punishing me or the 15 women in class. Hmm....

Well if it feels sore that means it's working. That's what they tell me anyway. My wireless earbuds arrived yesterday so I will now have music while running.

The weather looks good for this weekend and 8 of the miles are run on the boardwalk. The current song is 'Buy Dirt' and it would have been better had Jordan Davis carried it by himself. Luke Bryan kind of ruined it but it's still a good song.

Enjoy your day

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#9: October 11, 2021, 07:21:03 PM
Attaching.
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Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

 

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