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Author Topic: My Story BRAND NEW MAN 11

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My Story BRAND NEW MAN 11
#20: March 08, 2021, 04:50:10 PM
Its still cold outside and I don't feel like running yet. Maybe in 2 more weeks. I think I have no motivation because I set no running goal this year, lol. The Berlin Marathon is actually my goal but I don't have 100% certainty that its going to happen yet. I will know more in June.

Meanwhile I keep reading both the London and Berlin Marathon organizers are very enthused about October like the races are going to happen this year.

I do have 3 new pairs of Brooks Ghost 13 all ready to go. Pixels, Green and Lime are this years crop of colors. Lime looks like it has the potential of getting real dirty so I can only wear that pair in good weather.

I had a Tangerine Brooks Ghost 12 pair that got stained in clay mud on a trail one day. I washed them all the time but the clay left its permanent mark. I also ordered my Nutra Bio Whey Protein Isolate. This one has less than 5mg of cholesterol. Yea I was surprised they contain cholesterol as I picked one out once that had 40 mg per serving. This brand is both soy and lactose free and is touted as not having unnecessary filler as some other brands.

I received a letter from work the other day which identified me as someone who has not yet signed up for the 9/11 Victim Compensation Fund. You know, I don't believe I even work with anyone any longer who I could even ask if they received a similar letter.

I worked down at the WTC site but , you know, there are different degrees of work. I wouldn't classify myself as someone who actually sifted through the site. Anyway the letter said I was exposed to toxic air and thats why I have been identified. I was a young 29 yrs old back then, OMG.

Over the weekend I was processing years 2015, 2016, 2017, 2018, 2019, 2020, 2021. Its amazing how I can remember the events for each particular year precisely.

Tomorrow is dinner night and we will see what happens.

Have a good night everyone
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« Last Edit: March 08, 2021, 04:57:25 PM by Watcher »

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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#21: March 09, 2021, 02:09:58 AM
Enjoy your time with the Boys!

I had D10 with me this past weekend and had a wonderful time... Playgrounds, movies (at home), and R (bless her heart) helped D10 with her (late) homework while I went out with the dog and made dinner...
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Me - 58, xW - 50
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 14, D - 10
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#22: March 09, 2021, 05:16:57 AM
Hello,

Quote
I received a letter from work the other day which identified me as someone who has not yet signed up for the 9/11 Victim Compensation Fund.

I received a similar letter only its was in regards to a recall on the Chevrolet Malibu and I could get compensated as well. Unfortunately, I never owned a Chevy in my life.

I just hope you have a great dinner and time with either both or at least one of your sons.

You seem to be doing fine and when it warms up, you will start running again.

(((((Ready)))))
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#23: March 09, 2021, 10:06:23 AM
It is going to be gorgeous out there this week Watcher. Dust off  those running/hiking shoes!!  Spring is coming. 
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Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#24: March 09, 2021, 07:37:28 PM
Hi UrsaMajor, Readytofixmyselffirst, Dumbfounded.

Well tonight marks 13 consecutive weeks of dinner now on Tuesday night. Only S18 tonight as his brother was full from already eating earlier in the day. He chose Chinese food again which is fine. I introduced him to having his meal steamed and he likes it prepared that way now. S20 wasn't feeling it a few weeks ago when he tried it steamed, lol.

We are keeping with the parenting schedule per S18's request and I think the structure is good for all parties involved. His mom doesn't seem to be giving him a hard time yet with seeing me.

He asked if there were any scheduled holidays coming up. I told him that I have Memorial Day and I believe his mom has him for Easter. He says he hasn't celebrated Easter in years. I guess I could make up St. Patricks Day, lol.

He kept asking when school ends so IDK if he is concerned about the parenting schedule coming to a close. I did tell him we can just keep it going as long as he likes. I mentioned how the weather is about to make a turn for the good and we discussed hiking which he brought up.

I noticed he has all his bullet points that he touches on with me. School, basketball, places we have visited and plans we have discussed.

I have him this weekend and he is looking forward to Friday's pickup. He apologized for being late today which surprised me as he has been late evey single time thus far, lol.

We will celebrate his birthday this weekend and we have an appointment for snow tubing on Saturday. He also wants to practice driving. He looked good tonight as there was no venting about his mom which is good.

I dropped him back home and his mom was sitting in her car in the driveway with S20 and the house was dark. So no interaction between her and I which is also good. He just looked really at peace tonight.

Have a good night

Thank you
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#25: March 10, 2021, 01:13:48 AM
I dropped him back home and his mom was sitting in her car in the driveway with S20 and the house was dark.

How weird is THAT?

Especially since S18 isn't permitted to carry a house key.... just... odd.....
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Me - 58, xW - 50
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 14, D - 10
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

Survival Instructions for Newbies
Site Map
 
A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

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Re: BRAND NEW MAN 11
#26: March 10, 2021, 04:08:33 AM
Watcher, it's so lovely for us to read of you and S18 (my goodness!) having a relationship again, and how he has his subjects to go over with you, and how you saw him 'at peace' last night. Such a wonderful image. Poor kid, maybe he's beginning to see light at the end of these difficult years and can begin to be a regular boy with normal aspirations.
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Married 1989, together since 1984 
BD May 2014,
D26, D23, S16
OW Physical Affair same one. He and she said she turned 34 the month of BD. She turned 52 this year.

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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#27: March 10, 2021, 05:06:25 AM
Hi UrsaMajor, Milly.

Yes it is odd he doesn't have a key and the house is usually completely illuminated or blacked out. S18 mentioned the door would most likely be left unlocked. I saw his mom's car door open and I was like, son, you gotta go, like right now, lol.

I did let him know that I am available to drop him off or pick him up if he wants to see his friends and he seemed to like that idea. Being that he is virtually schooled he is really cooped up more than usual. Then again 3 kids at the school just came down with covid so they are not immune from getting it.

In school learning is optional at his school so now the entire school will be virtual for 2 weeks. I believe 6 or 7 kids have caught covid so far. S18 described the great precautions the school has taken inside the school as he did attend until Nov 1st. However, its basketball and wrestling seasons so doesn't sports kind of defeat their classroom precautions.

Yes he loves the virtual learning. No midterms, no finals, homework due in at midnight, lol. Yea and I have to pay for this nonsense, hahaha.

I'm waiting for really nice weather to take him hiking on Mt Tammany and Stairway to Heaven as they are both incredibly scenic. He seems interested in kayaking and we both have bikes so that is also an option.

Now I was thinking last night that he probably doesn't want to be hanging out with his dad but I did remind myself afterwards that I really represent the door being open for him to get outside of the home. So, yes, hopefully its his turn to walkaway from her crisis. Yes I would love for him to be a regular boy with normal aspirations.

Enjoy your day

Thank you
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#28: March 10, 2021, 11:04:10 AM
I love watching this all blossom. Let there be cake and birthday presents!!

I kept my S virtual during basketball because I was sure there would be an incident and then HOW would that work with him being in class. I just saw it as needless stress on his teachers and classmates not to mention the switching back and forth from in-person to virtual. But we got through the whole - albiet shortened - season without a single COVID issue.  Back to in-person on Monday here.

Love to see you stepping up for mundane Dad things like drop off and pick ups.  How wonderful it must be for your boys to know there is someone to call if it all goes south.         
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Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

W
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#29: March 12, 2021, 08:25:04 PM
Hi Dumbfounded.

Well the pickup went smooth again tonight as S18 was wearing shorts and a t shirt in 70+ degrees. We are dropping back down to the 40's for the weekend.

So I realized during our drive that his mom is using him as a conduit. He started with the pricey university over community college conversation again. So I asked him what else is your mom asking you to talk to me about.

Oh she just wanted to remind you about teaching me how to drive and she is looking to buy me contacts.

I didn't let it upset me however this is just a new form of control. I don't believe she is going to be a problem with the parenting schedule because she is lining up my life.

On a positive note she didn't come out to my car nor has she texted me. S18 looks generally enthused to be out and we were already making plans for April and May. Tomorrow we have an early start as we have a ski resort scheduled.

Yea IDK if I'm going to adjust to divorced life as its similar to married life. Maybe I lack maturity as I don't want to hear her input on anything. Just making observations.

Have a good night

Thank you
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