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Author Topic: Off-Topic Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies

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Off-Topic Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#30: September 07, 2021, 07:44:37 AM
I am sorry to hear that, may she rest in peace.

She was a great help to me in the beginning on this site - I never really followed her to her own site but I know that she helped many. We didn't always see eye to eye spiritually as she was from a different branch on the same tree. I know her faith was genuine and she did encourage me when mine was faltering.

I pray her family is comforted knowing that she gave of herself to many.
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M 61
H 61
S 31
D 28
BD 13 Dec 2010
Divorced 27 Feb 2015 (30 years marriage)

"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" Jeremiah 29:11

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Re: Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#31: September 07, 2021, 08:00:38 AM
Thanks for posting this, it is indeed very sad news. I did not know her well, but did read her articles and found quite a bit of insight. She definitely had figured a lot from her and her husbands experience. I realized that religion was a big part of her belief and views, and as much as that was not my thing I still found a lot from her writing that resonated.

Like everyone else I feel sad both for her and her family and for the community as a whole. It is indeed a loss in many ways. And so young
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No Kids, 23 years at BD1 (4 years), married 21
First signs of MLC Jan '15
BD 1 Jan '17, BD 2 Mar, Separated Apr, BD 3 May,BD 4 Jun '18
First Sign of Waking up-Dec '17, First Cycle out of MLC Mar '18-Jun ‘18, Second cycle Jul '18-??
Meets OM Jan '17 and acts "in love," admits "in love" Jun '18, asks for divorce Jul '18

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Re: Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#32: September 07, 2021, 08:58:18 AM
I realized that religion was a big part of her belief and views, and as much as that was not my thing I still found a lot from her writing that resonated.
Actually that is not true, she wrote from a very religous point of view however she was not religous in practice.

Which I understand is hard to believe but she did actually write about that from time to time.
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Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#33: September 07, 2021, 09:21:41 AM
I'm so sorry to hear this, OP. I'm especially saddened by how young HB was. You and I (XYZCF, Voyager, Kiki, California, Forthetrees, Stayed, Honour, Letting go, LearningIamOK, Crazystuff, JD, Movingforward,, Readytofixmyselffirst, and many others) go back to the early days of the forum with HB. She had a unique perspective and style and was helpful, and unflinchingly direct, in supporting me through some of the darkest days.
I wish her peace, and I wish healing for her family and I have gratitude for HB, and all of you, on my journey~
Phoenix
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Married 24 years
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D (young adult now)
BD 2010
He is a vanisher
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Re: Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#34: September 07, 2021, 09:30:52 AM
I realized that religion was a big part of her belief and views, and as much as that was not my thing I still found a lot from her writing that resonated.
Actually that is not true, she wrote from a very religous point of view however she was not religous in practice.

Which I understand is hard to believe but she did actually write about that from time to time.

Thanks for clarifying, it was my incorrect assumption from her writing.
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No Kids, 23 years at BD1 (4 years), married 21
First signs of MLC Jan '15
BD 1 Jan '17, BD 2 Mar, Separated Apr, BD 3 May,BD 4 Jun '18
First Sign of Waking up-Dec '17, First Cycle out of MLC Mar '18-Jun ‘18, Second cycle Jul '18-??
Meets OM Jan '17 and acts "in love," admits "in love" Jun '18, asks for divorce Jul '18

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Re: Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#35: September 07, 2021, 11:06:33 AM
Wow, really shocking. I didn't always resonate with her writing, but very early on I remember printing out her posts from here and just re-reading them over and over for comfort. Will always be grateful for that. Much love and prayers to her friends and family. So young.  :'(
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Re: Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#36: September 07, 2021, 12:20:57 PM
I never knew much about HB, or her writings (I think she left about the time I came here), only the few articles shared by RCR had on her site.  I honestly thought RCR's articles I related too better, for some reason, but I'm sure she helped many others.
(I joined I believe in 2013, bd was 2011)

However I did have one of HB's articles I saved, which to me made so much sense, after the initial shock, of course.

I'll share that with you.  Maybe it will help someone else.

https://thestagesandlessonsofmidlife.org/the-midlife-spouse-let-them-go/

Rest in peace, HB.
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A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

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Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#37: September 07, 2021, 01:16:06 PM
Oh, goodness, how sad.  I had quite. bit of correspondence with her in the early days of the forum.  She always had something interesting to impart. She will be missed. 
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Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#38: September 07, 2021, 03:54:25 PM
How sad to hear of HB. I was reading some of her articles only a few days ago.

I particularly always liked what she said along the lines of ‘Anyway how are you? How are you sleeping?’. It felt so caring when I needed it. I enjoyed a lot of what she wrote and appreciate her views as they made sense to me.

Her being so young is extra sad and I do worry about the extreme stress we are all under as LBS and MLCers.

RIP Hearts Blessings ‘Thank you for the musings
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Married 15+ years with 2 children
BD1 - 2016
BD2 - 2017
BD3 - Sept 2019
MOW Mar 2016-Jan 2018
OW2 - Feb 2019, age 30
H left home Oct 2017 to stay with his parents
Bought a family Puppy mid 2018 - referred to as ‘P’

Link to advice by my mentor, Phoenix, on what to tell the children about H leaving - reply #33 (it had a glitch)
https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9313.30

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Rest In Peace: When Someone Dies
#39: September 07, 2021, 06:30:26 PM
Very saddened by this loss.  So sorry to her family and friends.  54 is so very young.
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