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Author Topic: Discussion Script sentences and WTF moments

C
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Discussion Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#90: May 16, 2019, 05:02:03 PM
I remember him telling me he needs to run otherwise he feels like he's gonna 'die' i also got 'he might return one day' LOl yeah right mate! keep dreaming!
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m
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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#91: May 16, 2019, 05:27:26 PM
I remember him telling me he needs to run otherwise he feels like he's gonna 'die'

I've heard this variation: "It's a matter of life or death!"

WTF is wrong with them?!?
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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#92: May 16, 2019, 08:24:23 PM
So many of them say the same thing....you ask what is wrong with them?

They are in crisis. And MLC has amazing similarities in what they do and what they say..it's real folks.
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"Now faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see" Hebrews 11:1

"You enrich my life and are a source of joy and consolation to me. But if I lose you, I will not, I must not spend the rest of my life in unhappiness."

" The truth does not change according to our ability to stomach it". Flannery O'Connor

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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#93: May 16, 2019, 08:55:45 PM
I spoke to a woman in my coloring group who had her own MLC. She told me, in all seriousness, that she felt like she was smothering and if she didn't run she would die. Even her memory of it, she was certain she would die. She said it logically made no sense, but it was how she felt. I don't think she was recovered either, because she never came back.
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When life gives you lemons, make SALSA!

W
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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#94: May 16, 2019, 11:08:11 PM
I have avoided this Thread because I have heard nearly everything.

XW to MIl and Bil:- "Its not Whyus fault! He done nothing wrong ist all on me. I will never again find a man like Whyus. OM has no future, I know that it cannot work" (probably the truth)

XW to OM (yes he told me):- "Whyus neglected me. He was a bad father, he was never home. He hit me. We havent spoken properly in years. We havent had sex for 6 months...." (all lies of Course).
XW to me:- "We will be happy again one day, we will grow old together. You just have to give me time and be Patient". (BS, wanted to Keep me as a back up)

"I am not your W anymore as you knew her, that Person is gone. I have changed and you wouldnt like this woman or ever be happy with her" (That was the truth I think!)

After a very physical touch and go wher I returned from Gig at 5am and XW was in my bed. We done the Thing, then again after a couple of hours sleep. I noticed that the window was open and I wanted to Close it because she was getting very loud. "leave it open, the neighbours wont think that its me so ist OK" (massive WTF Moment there!!!)

"The Boys only stayed with you because they felt sorry for you, I didnt walk out on my Boys". I asked her "What part of "Boys, I want to have my own Little flat, I want to be alone and not have to clean up after anybody. I only want to cook for myself when and if I want to. I only want to wash my own clothes and not the mountains you create". made the Boys feel as though you wanted them to live with you? (she denied saying it but all 4 of were at the table)..

so many more Things... its just all too crazy  :-[
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« Last Edit: May 16, 2019, 11:09:48 PM by Whyus »
Married - 19,5 Years pre BD
Together - 21,5 Years
Me: 46
W: 46 (Acts 25)
BD 1: 10.01.2017
BD 2: 24.02.2017 OM 28 (now 31) Trainings partner. Is tolerated by LaFamiglia
2 Sons - 20 & 21
1 Dogs and a cat.
Own home . Sold!
Divorce Date 21.08.2018
T1  http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8671.0

C
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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#95: May 16, 2019, 11:45:50 PM
And the other classic ' I LEFT U NOT THE KIDS'
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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#96: May 17, 2019, 01:13:34 AM
I suggest we print few hundreds of T-shirts with " :o" in front. Feel free to design the back of it. It could be the joining gift at HS  ;D

Whole thing gets exhausting, if she's as unhappy as she says sometimes i wish she would just divorce me.  I feel like an idiot looking for little positive signs.  She ignores me a few days, but then is nice and talks to me for 5 minutes so i am all excited.  Feel like an idiot cause its stupid.

As you was told already Skates, no need to feel idiot, that's how it works! That's how she is holding the rope. Can't let you go but you know, needs the space...
Thinking of it now, retrospective, I feel you though. It was really tough, every 'good sign' rose expectations, no matter how much I tried to not let them to. Then, straight back down again.
It's really a cruel use of power and that's why detachment is so essential, any way you can step further from her emotionally helps you to protect yourself from that.

Few more from me:

"I'm not sure if we have anything in common anymore" (how about kids, dear?)
" I don't want to live in loveless marriage" ME: "Our marriage is not loveless is it??" XW: "No it isn't"  :o
"This is just not the R I need in this phase of my life" ME: "Why? BC we have small kids??" XW: "Yes"
"We can have sex today if you want to if you after that agree to talk about how we would make all the things work if we divorced"  :o
"I need my space and to think everything trough in my process, but I want you to act normal and have intimacy with me and all that IF I feel like it" (do I sense a bit selfishness here??)
 "Can't we set each other free temporarily?"




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"I've seen dreams that move the mountains, hope that doesn't ever end even when the sky is falling. I've seen miracles just happen, silent prayers get answered, broken hearts become brand new. That's what faith can do." Kutless

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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#97: May 17, 2019, 01:46:36 AM
And the famous....

"Well, we'll get D'd now and then maybe in <7, 9, 10> years we can get back together."<friend's names> parents did that."  :o ::)
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Me - 60, xW - 54
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 16, D - 12
1 Dog
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019
Moved on in life

Survival Instructions for Newbies
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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#98: May 17, 2019, 01:50:51 AM
And the famous....

"Well, we'll get D'd now and then maybe in <7, 9, 10> years we can get back together."<friend's names> parents did that."  :o ::)

Can we separate now and then MAYBE get back together is what I got.
WTF is that??  ;D

I also love that in someone's thread (or was it in this one?) someone's Midlifer gave exact years, like "let's get back together after 6 years".
Why?? What happens in 6 years that doesn't happen in 5 or 7 years?
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"I've seen dreams that move the mountains, hope that doesn't ever end even when the sky is falling. I've seen miracles just happen, silent prayers get answered, broken hearts become brand new. That's what faith can do." Kutless

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Re: Script sentences and WTF moments
#99: May 17, 2019, 01:57:00 AM
And the famous....

"Well, we'll get D'd now and then maybe in <7, 9, 10> years we can get back together."<friend's names> parents did that."  :o ::)

Can we separate now and then MAYBE get back together is what I got.
WTF is that??  ;D

I also love that in someone's thread (or was it in this one?) someone's Midlifer gave exact years, like "let's get back together after 6 years".
Why?? What happens in 6 years that doesn't happen in 5 or 7 years?

Mine said 7 initially.... Then it was 8, then 10..... She kept extending the deadline I guess because she would ALWAYS get the

look.....
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Me - 60, xW - 54
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 16, D - 12
1 Dog
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019
Moved on in life

Survival Instructions for Newbies
Site Map
 
A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

 

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