[readytofixmyselffirst]

Hello,

xW was not here and I was not really surprised. I feared that xW's lawyer would be not here, and a new postpone, but fortunately it did'nt happen ! So our case has been heard today, the first in the morning.

It never bodes well if one of the spouses does not attend and only has their attorney as it really shows a lack of care for the court and the proceedings. The fact that the attorney was not prepared didn't help at all either.

The judge told us that she will give her decision June 30th (an unexpected good news).

I will be in your corner rooting for you. This is the tough part as you never know how the judge will rule. However, it seems your case is solid and you have persevered through such a tough time.

Keep you eye on the kids and have a great weekend,


(((Ready)))

[OffRoad]

Sounds like the hearing went well. I hope you get the results you want on the 30th. You sound like you are doing quite well and I am happy for you.

[FrenchHuman]

thanks dear friends for your nice comments ! I finally got the judge's decision, and it went very well, but few days before end of June, I got again one last break of my limits by entering the house.

Breaking the limit
XW kept in front of the house during a couple of hours. It was really painful. I did not want to let her enter and the police declined to intervene (as the judgement was not available). We had an unpleasant argument outside witnessed by a neighbour. I had scheduled to join S16 at the supermarket and I did not want to have the children seeing something unpleasant, so I finally decided to let xW enter the house, but not before I have arranged that S7 would spend the night with friends.
xW spent only one day at our home and she was really useless : she did not spend normal time with the children, during the day, she did not pick S7 at school (I went) and she did not eat with us. When I was out of the house she had a 1h discussion with the girls who cried and were emotionnally impacted by the discussion.
During few days after that both girls were deeply angry towards xW and angry towards me. Now it is better.

Judgement
With no surprise, I got the full custody for the children, the alimony and the right to use and enjoy the house (usus and fructus). I am happy with the decision that will help me to ensure the respect of my limits.
The judge has also agreed my request to get a mediation between xW and I. I hope it will help us to reach an agreement for topics related to the children and the sales and share of our assets. Thanks to the judge's decision I feel in a very comfortable position for the next steps.
xW could also appeal but IMO that would be a very bad move for her.

Holidays and activities at home
the children are at home with me, they are in holidays and they are well. D18 will work at her sport club then she will participate to the French championship. D16 has been 3 days in Italy with her best friends (and their mums  ). S7 is as always, full of life and joy.
We went together to S7's end of year school, then D16's dance show. Then we visited an observatory of astronomy (for S7). Tomorrow we will all join D18 who will do paragliding (my birthday present for her). Yesterday we ate in a very good restaurant (my present for their very nice results at school)
All very good activities and quality time together. The children are not complaining that their mother is not with them. They are asking me for everything they do : D16 is learning to drive.

In 2 weeks we will go together in the Alps for the 25th birthday of my B's wedding. Then my father will take S7 for 10 days and the girls will have holidays together. Then the 3 children will go in Switzerland for 8 days (xW has right to take kids 50% of 2 months, let's say that is all that she can do atm)

New relationship
Everything is very good with my friend, we both have talked with the children and we both plan activities with the family : I with hers and she with mine. It is fast I know, on the other hand we are very well together and as we want to spend more time together we find it is necessary.
D18 and S7 are happy for me, and D16 is quieter (no surprise)
Speaking about time, it seems to fly at a very high speed when we are together ! It is exactly the opposite phenomenon as we LBS meet at BD ! Crazy !

[Treasur]

Congratulations on the court judgement, FH! I can see that it must have been a real relief to get full custody and to know that you can continue to be the sane and safe parent for your kids.

[forthetrees]

What a relief to have so much uncertainty behind you. I am sure that your kiddos also feel relief. It´s not like they weren´t already experiencing the absence of their mom. Your ex is now in the phase of her journey of confronting the consequences for her decisions. Likely you will be a target of blame for the magical life she imagined not coming to fruition. Not your circus, not your monkeys.

Enjoy the holidays with the kiddos and the peace, serenity and security of knowing that your home is now your castle.

[JohnnyBravo]

Really glad to hear that, FH.