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Author Topic: My Story Just Getting Started in this Journey 3

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My Story Just Getting Started in this Journey 3
#40: March 22, 2024, 03:17:27 AM
Have you got your own lawyer and taken legal advice, Baxter1? Bc imho once they file, the landscape changes and your priorities might need to adapt accordingly.
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T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.


"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg
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Just Getting Started in this Journey 3
#41: March 22, 2024, 04:08:08 AM
Quote from: Treasur on March 22, 2024, 03:17:27 AM
Have you got your own lawyer and taken legal advice, Baxter1? Bc imho once they file, the landscape changes and your priorities might need to adapt accordingly.
Exactly correct -
New Priority #1 - Know your options/rights..... Get up to speed with the legal aspects because once they file, it is ALL just business.....
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Me - 60, xW - 54
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 16, D - 12
1 Dog
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019
Moved on in life
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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.
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Re: Just Getting Started in this Journey 3
#42: March 22, 2024, 04:58:03 AM
Quote from: Baxter1 on March 22, 2024, 03:00:30 AM
Some Journaling

She filed the other day. It’s been a little over a year of her threatening to file if I don’t move out so she finally did it the other day. This doesn’t affect my stand, it’s my understanding that these things take time but I’m still holding on. Maybe it was pressure from the Alienator or maybe she’s getting close to SPLAT and this is just her way of escaping and avoiding.I guess it really does get worse before it gets better. I’m still in the home and still see the kids(and Baxter)  every day. She still locks herself in her room when she gets home. Still high energy but has slowed down a lot of the last couple of months. Time will tell what happens..

it is really funny how our wives seem to follow same script  :o and same timeline. I received the divorce letter one month and a few days ago. But no divorce filed until now.
High energy / Low Energy -> at the moment I don't see the difference in speed, only the difference in intensity. Have courage and Faith ! And yes, I agree with other advises : a lawyer is a priority now for you.
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M 44, W43. Married 18 years, together 21
3 children D17, D15, S6
OM discovered Dec 22, BD Jan 23 (few days after)
W still living at home
Aimer, c'est donner sans attendre de retour et tout acte est prière, s'il est don de soi (Antoine de Saint Exupéry)
Love means to give without expecting return, and every act is a prayer if it is a self-gift. (thanks OffRoad !)
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Just Getting Started in this Journey 3
#43: March 22, 2024, 11:40:06 PM
Our Prime Minister in Australia’s wife ended his marriage on New Year’s Day a few years ago and he said something that really helped me and others I know on this journey.

Albo said “I needed to stop trying to understand it and just accept it and accept it.” I spent so much time trying to understand where my wife went and why this had happened to me. My life has got better now I have stopped struggling to understand and just accepted where I am.


I am very sorry Baxter. It all takes time. Everything had to be done in. A rush for us and now 4 months later she has not filed the agreement. I don’t attach significance to it.


Find a good lawyer. Listen to the advice and make good decisions for you and your children. It is all you can do.
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