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Author Topic: My Story standing on my own two feet

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  • MLCer Type: Clinging Boomerang
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  • Gender: Female
My Story Re: standing on my own two feet
#30: January 31, 2016, 06:08:00 PM
He is trying to detach from the drama. Hes getting better at it. He reakized he was enabling it. The more he pulls away the worse it gets with ow. I stay out of. Except for that time she got my phone number out of him and threatened to text me. I stayed awake for an hour waiting for her to try me. She never did. Shes a coward. She tried to tell him she did but he knew she didnt because he was sitting with me waiting lol

The kids are fine with everything. They are very well grounded and very loved. He doesnt ignore them and he always makes sure to stay in contact with them if he isnt here.

He isn't drinking really. It was one time which is amazing considering. He is very grounded in his sobriety. Its a huge change and hes been doing very well. I dont enable him with it anymore. Hes doing good.
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Me 40
H 43
SD 22 D20 S14 S10
bomb drop  october 2013
secret trip with OW June 2014
moved out to live with OW July 2014
left state with ow to go to treatment Nov 2014
Ow gave birth to OC June 2015
h is on probation back here at home
H married ow dec 2015 while still being legally married to me
H returned home 4/17
EA turned PA
still says he loves me but he has to grow as a person
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Re: standing on my own two feet
#31: February 01, 2016, 07:17:28 AM
That's good to hear, BI.

Those addictions can be brutal.

I'm happy your kids are well adjusted and loved by both of you.  So many kids get very screwed up going though this.

Obviously his ow is afraid of you.   ;D
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A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."
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  • MLCer Type: Clinging Boomerang
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  • Gender: Female
Re: standing on my own two feet
#32: February 01, 2016, 10:10:30 AM
Shes terrified of me lol

All i know is now i have his full permission to beat the hell out of her if i ever get a chance again. Shes lucky all i ever did was grab her face and shove her into a wall.
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Me 40
H 43
SD 22 D20 S14 S10
bomb drop  october 2013
secret trip with OW June 2014
moved out to live with OW July 2014
left state with ow to go to treatment Nov 2014
Ow gave birth to OC June 2015
h is on probation back here at home
H married ow dec 2015 while still being legally married to me
H returned home 4/17
EA turned PA
still says he loves me but he has to grow as a person
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  • MLCer Type: Clinging Boomerang
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 2753
  • Gender: Female
Re: standing on my own two feet
#33: February 01, 2016, 05:30:19 PM
Oh hes completely manic today. Whatever is going on he's in a tailspin. Its stressful. Im trying hard to stay calm. Its S8s birthday, he is now S9 lol

I told him i didnt want to hear his mess anymore so hes trying hard to not say anything, hes been talking to his cousin and some fb friends instead. But he is angry and crazed. Something is going to give soon and its going to be ugly i can just feel it.
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Me 40
H 43
SD 22 D20 S14 S10
bomb drop  october 2013
secret trip with OW June 2014
moved out to live with OW July 2014
left state with ow to go to treatment Nov 2014
Ow gave birth to OC June 2015
h is on probation back here at home
H married ow dec 2015 while still being legally married to me
H returned home 4/17
EA turned PA
still says he loves me but he has to grow as a person
C
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Re: standing on my own two feet
#34: February 02, 2016, 02:05:26 AM
Keep your feet firmly planted in the safety zone BI, then let the fall out land where it may. Let us know how things go.  :)
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BD 29 Nov '13
Left home 8 June '14
Does not live with OW
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Re: standing on my own two feet
#35: February 02, 2016, 02:43:31 AM
Do you have any idea why he's so angry?   :o

Sorry BI.
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A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."
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  • MLCer Type: Clinging Boomerang
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  • Posts: 2753
  • Gender: Female
Re: standing on my own two feet
#36: February 02, 2016, 06:28:51 AM
Yes i now why hes angry and it has nothing to do with me. It all has to do with what hes done. Im letting him sort it out. He calmed down enough to have dinner and cake and presents.
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Me 40
H 43
SD 22 D20 S14 S10
bomb drop  october 2013
secret trip with OW June 2014
moved out to live with OW July 2014
left state with ow to go to treatment Nov 2014
Ow gave birth to OC June 2015
h is on probation back here at home
H married ow dec 2015 while still being legally married to me
H returned home 4/17
EA turned PA
still says he loves me but he has to grow as a person
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  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 24015
  • Gender: Female
Re: standing on my own two feet
#37: February 02, 2016, 09:32:03 AM
Well maybe that's the first stage of healing.  Getting angry at yourself for what you done.  Realize no one but you put yourself in this mess.
Now if he can take steps to fix it that might be a second step.

But good you stay out of it.   ;D
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A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."
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  • MLCer Type: Clinging Boomerang
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 2753
  • Gender: Female
Re: standing on my own two feet
#38: February 02, 2016, 02:12:19 PM
It wouldnt be so bad if d18 wasnt being manic as well. I have two people tugging on me and driving me crazy. Her and h are both manic as heck right now. I think d18 might be showing signs of being bipolar. So its hard dealing with them both. Im tired. Hes been on a cleaning frenzy and working out. Hes driving me nuts. Im sitting in the car trying to avoid them both right now to save my sanity.
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Me 40
H 43
SD 22 D20 S14 S10
bomb drop  october 2013
secret trip with OW June 2014
moved out to live with OW July 2014
left state with ow to go to treatment Nov 2014
Ow gave birth to OC June 2015
h is on probation back here at home
H married ow dec 2015 while still being legally married to me
H returned home 4/17
EA turned PA
still says he loves me but he has to grow as a person
P
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  • Gender: Female
Re: standing on my own two feet
#39: February 03, 2016, 08:17:29 PM
I found you!

I'm attaching !!!!
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