Thank you, ML, FW, Flummoxed and HL! Some days it is still difficult to believe I was living a completely different life 9 years ago, with a completely different man. My goodness, how much I've changed and in turn, my life has changed since that fateful, Jan 2016 BD.
Even though time has done it's thing, it does still pain me to think about everything my xh so carelessly discarded for nothing of any value in return. His fantasy R with OW has long since crashed and burned, as most do, and I haven't had any contact with him in years. If it wasn't for family giving an occasional passing update, I honestly wouldn't know if he was dead or alive. And, that is a strange feeling to have about someone with whom I'd spent nearly 2 decades.
Even so, life is very good now. For those of you just now learning to navigate this crisis, I can only encourage you through my story, that life does go on and you will not always feel the way you do at this moment. The best piece of advice I can give is to stop giving the MLC your attention and focus on you. Grow, learn, and above all, reconnect with yourself. You're more than capable and more than enough.