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Author Topic: My Story Reasons for leaving and justifications for behavior many MLCers give #2

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my h has always loved my buffalo chicken dip but since bd he acts like I am the absolutely worst cook ever. Wrinkles up his nose and all. Even yelled at me during dinner that the food had no taste. All I could do was chuckle when he came back with his 3rd lettuce wrap with it in it. Of course, since he wouldn't look at me or anything he didn't notice.

He also tells me that I don't listen to what he says when he obviously hadn't talked to me about whatever it was. I told him to stop talking to everyone else about what I need to do and maybe he will remember what he has talked to me. He claims that he doesn't talk to anyone else. Again you just have to find humor in some of this crap.

Hopefully, these mlcers will wake up and realize how crazy they really are. My cousins husband was in it for about a year and he told her "I really lost my mind" and that he had ow because she made him feel young.
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M 40
H 41
He moved out May 21,2017
Ow 41( his 1st cousin) moved her in May 23, 2017, she went back to her husband Oct 2017
Ow moved back with her 2 kids Jan 1 2018 even with courts cutting his visitation with his kids because of it
Ow moved out again Dec 2019 and is back with her husband Jan 2020
T-19 yr M-14 yrs
S14 & D88
BD  February 12 2017 & April 22 2017 (signs of MLC since 2015)
I filed for divorce June 2 2017 for protection- final hearing on our 20th anniversary (July 11,2018) divorce was final August 9, 2018

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8791.0
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8948.0
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9189.0
https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=10052.150

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Yes, mine has drawn total blanks on some of the things he's said.  And shown other memory issues.  And some of the things, he rewrote, so he has a different story about what actually was said.  At first, I seriously thought I was the one that was crazy.  But now I realize that it's his mind that's got the glitch right now.
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Survival Instructions for Newbies

The Apology Every LBS Deserves

My Journey

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass - it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Don't become a container for bitterness.  It's a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

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Ahhhh the foggy brain! My H still has a bit of that even after coming back! I'm not sure who has the dementia, my Mom or my H!  ;) They both sound about the same!
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Married 18
BD April 2012
Left home Nov 2012
Home May 2016

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Up until last June ex though s was 4 years old ....even got him clothes for a 4 yr old ermmmm s is 7 and when i told him this he tired  to deny  ::) ::)
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Put a knife  through your heart and twist it and hundred times, does it hurt, this what my kids feel. Put a second knife through your heart and twist them both a hundred times and this is what I feel for I carry the pain of my children in my heart as well as mine!!!

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Ahhhh the foggy brain! My H still has a bit of that even after coming back! I'm not sure who has the dementia, my Mom or my H!  ;) They both sound about the same!

I just pray and hope that all of our spouses/partners come out of this craziness/madness sooner than later...for our sakes and our family 😘.  There appears to be no logical answers for everything they say and do.  It is pure mania.  Mania that impacts many many lives......
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Me 47
Him 47
OW 32
Married - 20 years
Together - 28 years
BD - Nov 2014 - reason for affair said I controlled his life, wore flannelette pyjama pants to bed and drove our family car 🤔
Moved in with Young OW and her 2 kids Jan 2015
Total Vanisher
Divorced Sept 2016
S21, S17, S16 (autism), D14

🌹🌹Let's be real...Bren is the only one who can do Bren. I'm the best Bren on the planet. Trying to turn a skank into a Bren? That will surely end in disappointment, if it hasn't already.🌹🌹

❤❤Family isn't an important thing.  IT IS EVERYTHING!! ❤❤



Vanished Return Stories Thread #1 - https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9088.0;all
Vanisher Return Stories Link Thread #2 - https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9378.new#new

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I remember one of the phrases he said when i had asked him to write a letter to the school to say that he left the kids in my care so the kids could change schools ......his answer

' I will do no such thing I disintegrated by choice '

 His answer still baffles me  :o
I had to stop reading  and respond with fits of laughter. This is hilarious! And true. I'm  sure he disintegrated by choice. Poor choice, but well.....
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« Last Edit: March 23, 2017, 09:47:53 PM by OffRoad »
When life gives you lemons, make SALSA!

s
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What causes the memory loss? I mean what actually causes the fog? I wonder if there is memory loss outside of the situation with the LBS like at work etc - surely it must be overall rather than isolated?
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I think they can compartmentalize while at work.  Maybe a lot of it is just auto pilot while at work?

My MLC'ers boss did say that he was changed after D.  NO happier, even more of a grumpy bear at work.  At one point they had to sit down together and discuss his attitude.
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Survival Instructions for Newbies

The Apology Every LBS Deserves

My Journey

"Life isn't about waiting for the storm to pass - it's about learning to dance in the rain."

"Don't become a container for bitterness.  It's a toxin that destroys what it's carried in."

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What causes the memory loss? I mean what actually causes the fog? I wonder if there is memory loss outside of the situation with the LBS like at work etc - surely it must be overall rather than isolated?

I have often wondered this as well, not only with the memory loss but the monstering.  Surely it is not only directed at the family unit.  I have been told by several of my exh workmates that he is just not the same person anymore...guess in my exh case the crisis has affected his work.
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Me 47
Him 47
OW 32
Married - 20 years
Together - 28 years
BD - Nov 2014 - reason for affair said I controlled his life, wore flannelette pyjama pants to bed and drove our family car 🤔
Moved in with Young OW and her 2 kids Jan 2015
Total Vanisher
Divorced Sept 2016
S21, S17, S16 (autism), D14

🌹🌹Let's be real...Bren is the only one who can do Bren. I'm the best Bren on the planet. Trying to turn a skank into a Bren? That will surely end in disappointment, if it hasn't already.🌹🌹

❤❤Family isn't an important thing.  IT IS EVERYTHING!! ❤❤



Vanished Return Stories Thread #1 - https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9088.0;all
Vanisher Return Stories Link Thread #2 - https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9378.new#new

s
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I have hardly any contact with Hs friends so haven't got any insight. I'm not sure he seems much of the sensible ones. He did say at BD he drives around feeling numb and acting his way through work etc maybe that's what they do, they act along but for all I know that's changed and he's fine now. I mean, the video he made of himself rapping in the car showed he really wasn't normal but that's the only indication.

I would just like to understand what actually causes this fog / memory loss etc. If someone was acting really crazy then friends and family would know, but with mLC they are effectively acting crazy in a normal context so it's harder for anyone to think any things wrong?
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