[Lostinthewoods]

Hi madluv,
Thank you for sharing your experience. I understand this is soo unimaginably crazy.
I don't want to live like this given a choice. I also know making the choice is in my hands and the abuse can stop.
There are many ifs and buts. I know i will get to a place of healing. Right now priority is the house , sons college.
Update: I've gone dark grey like I told you'll earlier.  He behaves himself,  he is also mostly to himself.  Both of us extremely busy with work.
I'm studying and completing certifications to help my career. Even though I have a tough boss she is happy with my work. Spend Lots of energy at work. I actually enjoy work. Have lots of fun.
( completely God's grace).
I watch q movie or some program before hitting the bed.
Am I over it? No. There qre tears some days  sandness comes and goes, I manage.  I am doing better than I thought. Except for the loss of this part of my life I'm ok.

[Lostinthewoods]

Hi Everyone,
OK Journaling,  it has been week since we.had the talk and arguments.
I've gone completely dark. He asks questions ( very rarely) I just respond. I do not volunteer any conversation.
He is still here even though he is sure our relationship is over and that it will not work between us.
In the last conversation I had I was clear about what I wanted. I'm not compromising.
MLC has taught me not to run behind him. I've always been the pursuer.  Not anymore.
Iin the first 2 years after MLC I wanted him somehow. Now not so  much . I can live without him. In fact given the way he is behaving it would be better he was not here. I would.like.to think of it as some progress.
I wonder why he is here even though it is all over in his eyes? He is extremely sure because he cannot be transparent with me.
He told my son whenever he was transparent it came back to bite him.
I asked him to give me one valid example or scenario and he had none
He also said he had exited the marriage long back
Why is he here and irritating me?

[KayDee]

Wow, seems like you have turned a really important corner Lost. And in answer to  the 'why is he still here' question, I evoke my favourite MLC answer of 'who knows'? Keep the faith in you. You will see, more and more, you are the one holding all the good cards.

[Songanddance]

Hi Everyone,
OK Journaling,  it has been week since we.had the talk and arguments.
I've gone completely dark. He asks questions ( very rarely) I just respond. I do not volunteer any conversation.
He is still here even though he is sure our relationship is over and that it will not work between us.
In the last conversation I had I was clear about what I wanted. I'm not compromising.
MLC has taught me not to run behind him. I've always been the pursuer.  Not anymore.
Iin the first 2 years after MLC I wanted him somehow. Now not so  much . I can live without him. In fact given the way he is behaving it would be better he was not here. I would.like.to think of it as some progress.
I wonder why he is here even though it is all over in his eyes? He is extremely sure because he cannot be transparent with me.
He told my son whenever he was transparent it came back to bite him.
I asked him to give me one valid example or scenario and he had none
He also said he had exited the marriage long back
Why is he here and irritating me?

Oh this is all so familiar.....
Clinging Boomerang - stay at homer. He is in crisis and you are his anchor.  Yada yada.......
You're doing a great job in your own progress.
Unfortunately there is the acceptance that this behaviour and being still around is "normal" for a clinger.

Live your life and at some point you will know what to do.

It took me a long time to decide; your timeline is your own to choose and navigate.