[readytofixmyselffirst]

Hello,

Well, first of all- Happy Birthday to you and Belated Happy Birthday to KA!!!!

Yes, a lot of cancelled events and social moments. My wife and I are just planning on Thanksgiving with the six of us. Last year, it was at my house with close to 30 people. Not this year.

On Halloween night I'll go over there and help hand out candy.

I don't know if we can hand out candy this year. I am in California, for all I know passing out candy is a felony!!!

Have a great time enjoying the little things,

Ready

[STP]

Journalling

Despite all the political madness quiet time continues. I passed ten years working at my current company and in another nine months, it will be the longest duration for me at one business.

I haven't seen anyone other than my kids and KA which is a good thing in these times. S18 was over yesterday with his brothers S21 and S25 and he's back at XWs now as college campus closed due to covid. Poor kid went there to play football and only got 18 practices in and no games before being sent home. He's now talking about not going back to college and being a fence builder for a friend of XWs. I'm okay with this if the job is good and prevents me from years and years of out-of-state tuition payments for him. I told him he'll probably never get to play football again if he quit school. Covid messed it up. His gf, two years older, was over briefly and talked about getting a  place together and taking the cats from S27s.

Over the weekend KAs D8 had me cover my ears and close my eyes and when it was okay to open them I got the gist she was telling her mom I've gotten fat. Leave it to a kid to be brutally honest. Yes, I know I'm back to my January 1st weight. I quit running Sept 30th due to leg pains that still persist five weeks later. I've been massaging them, stretching and did some leg curls too which is helping. The shin splints in my right leg are quite painful especially when I've been sitting. It feels more in the bones than muscles now and I'm hoping not a stress fracture from over running and too many days off. S27 gave me back the Weider weight bench workout machine which I will use as I'm avoiding the public gym.

KA and I had done a blood sugar detox last FEB and I lost  11 lbs the first week and like 27 lbs in four weeks which took all year to creep back on. I have too much perishable food currently to fully engage in it but will do some of the days this month. I'm hoping I can start running again soon. If not healed by DEC I'll go to the doctor for my leg. The hardest days of the sugar detox are the liquid days of protein smoothie, vegetable juice, chicken broth and water.

If you're following along thanks for your readership.

[STP]

Gossiping

XW called me with further details about S18s plan to quit college (he enrolled to play football and due to COVID it's not happening). He will finish the semester but then we will have to start paying back on the loan. I know the guy S18 will work for. I will call the loan company today to find out a total and make sure XW is paying half of it. S18s birthday is coming up in a couple weeks and I will go in half with XW and get his car windows tinted. I also get to stop paying child support. yay!

Yesterday, I went to visit my parents in IL and S18 came with me as he hadn't seen them since Christmas. He told me S25, whose car is in the shop after hitting a deer, totaled the OMs car after borrowing it to get to school. Apparently, a semi-truck was struck by high winds and blown into him. So for the time being OM and XW will share her new car. You may recall S18 totaled her car (the one I paid off in exchange for me keeping the house) earlier this year. Crazy how both their cars totaled by two of our kids.

I asked him about the pet rats, if they still had any and was surprised she now has 8 of them! They get to come out and run around her bedroom daily. Oh geeze! I knew they had a dog and had got a special hypo-allergic cat due to his allergies. I was surprised to hear they now have a puppy. This  is so like my XW. Her way to find happiness is to keep getting things and changing things to try and bring her miserable self happiness. When her happiness fades she takes on more or does different things. BF has speculated she must be miserable with OM. He works from home so they are together every single day.  He must drive her crazy right? I asked S18 if he can see her ever moving and he said shes always saying "We can fix this up for when we sell the house." She's never lived in any house over seven years. Just a matter of time when she decides her house no longer makes her happy and moves again. She's never gonna get that happiness she wants no matter how many animals she gets or the changes she makes to try to bandage over how unhappy she is.

When S18 came out to the car he went through their garage and I could see how jammed it was with stuff. What is all that stuff? They've been in that house less than 3 years and can't get even one car in their two car garage! I know none of it is his as he wiped his butt clean of his family and old life. Jewelry show stuff. At best she was making 12k a year doing it when we were together. She's a lead anchor and gonna drag OM down.

Apparently they still had ten people over for a Halloween party too. Her friends as he ditched his for her. She is so spoiled, not wanting to play by the Indiana rules of not gathering en masse. I am so happy NOT to be with that woman and part of all that drama and muck. I have a spacious house without all the hoarding crap and can get two cars in my garage. smh

My friend MM messaged me on Fri she tested positive for COVID. Deservingly so after all her socializing. Stupid people don't know they are stupid. I was a bit steamed to see the day she tested, she hung out with our hike leader. He is an old retiree and taking COVID very seriously. I messaged him off yesterday to ask if MM had talked to him lately and told him about MM being positive the day they hung out. MM and I have tenative plans to watch a movie this upcoming weekend, although I dunno when as I'm at KAs until Sunday and then my kids come over to play games. Do I even wanna expose myself to her 12 days after her positive test? Even odder I had a dream I was kissing her this morning. wtf?

I hope all of you are healthy and finding happiness in these challenging times.

[STP]

Journalling

I contacted XW curious since my name is the only one on the loan for S18s college loan. She said we each have a loan. Just to make sure, I contacted financial aid at the university and it's true. She hasn't tried to put one over on me but puts my mind at ease to hear it from the source. This is the last week of child support for S18. I talked to human resources and they can't make any change until receiving a court order which should process automatically. It'll be nice to have that money back which will go towards his college anyway. XW also mentioned about S25 totaling OMs car. It had just been paid off the month prior. Jeeze.

MM had talked about getting together to watch a movie but when the day came I heard nothing and didn't reach out to her.

For Thanksgiving I will again go to KAs and her parents will join us (they've been divorced over 30 years). Friday I will have my four kids over along with KA. No out of state visiting my parents this year.

Today I am going to organize an ornament exchange for people in my party group. See if any want to mail them to each other since no gathering. It's always nice to have things to open.

Have a wonderful feast with your immediate households and enjoy the time off work. I'm thankful for this forum and you.

[Thunder]

STP I'm glad you are using your head and keeping yourself safe.
What is wrong with people?  Is it really that hard to understand there is a Pandemic going on?   

Hope your legs get better and you and KA can enjoy the rest of the holidays.

YAY no more CS!

[readytofixmyselffirst]

Hello,

We had a small Thanksgiving feast as well. Last year, 37 people and I smoked two turkeys. This year, 5 people and we sat outside and had a quick meal. The food was great and we had a god time, but just wasn't the same as last year. My parents stayed home and my daughter went to her husband's family while my youngest stayed with her mom.

Hope you had an amazing Thanksgiving and the ornament exchange sounds like an awesome idea!

((((Ready))))

[STP]

Thanks for replies Thunder and Ready.

I had a nice Thanksgiving day at KAs but saw no other family. I didn't get to see my kids this weekend or S19 for his birthday as XW tested positive for Covid on Tuesday and S19 messaged me he had a fever. S27 might have it too. BF texted me last night to ask about things and I told her stuff. We think it's funny OM isn't allowed to watch Green Bay PAckers games on tv. XW musta nipped that in the wedding vows. LOL. He is so whipped on her. I'm already trying to guess when they will move again as XW has never lived in the same house more than 7 years. Whenever S21 and S19 move out I imagine she will go bonkers with OM around the house each day. Whatever.

Have a good week.

[STP]

Not much going on.

I feel like my alone time has become more valuable as of late as I am certainly in a routine. Monday and Thursday nights are my only free ME time now as KA is seen TUES, FRI and SAT. SUN is my time playing games with three of my kids and WED I am now game playing via zoom meetings. All things I want to do-just sayin. When the boys were over yesterday, S25 was commenting about the end of child support to XW who I guess will be struggling more. Her jewelry making biz doesn't amount to much and as he says "what can she do at her age?: I guess OM is paying BF a lot in alimony!? I'm not clear on how alimony works but it could be thousands a month to her. Both those kids are over 21 so no idea that situation or when it ends.

My S21 has been into guns and firing them in my backyard as I have miles of woods behind me and distant neighbors. Saturday all 4 kids came over as well as my nephew, former nephew and two of their friends for a big shoot up targets with like 8 guns in my backyard. S21 said XW has a permit for concealed carry now. Sheesh. All I can say is I'm glad to be away from all of that. She just can't be content. There always has to be change and upheaval.

I have a new friend on facebook who is a cosplay person. She's married with 4 kids and we've chatted and she's impressed with my photoshop editing skills and is now paying me to work on photos of her. The first batch is her as Jessica Rabbit from Who Framed Roger Rabbit. I don't mind the sporadic work.

It's been quiet since my last post here. No communication with MM, DC, JS or any others etc. Well, MM sends me music stories but we don't talk. I organized an ornament exchange with a dozen others in my party group. The pandemic has really quieted relationships and steered me back toward being introverted. Friend groups have splintered and when all's normal in the world, I'll have to see who can be brought back to the fold.

[Ready2Transform]

About a year or so deep after he left my xH got a conceal carry license. did F&I War reenacting, so muskets and rifles were common around the house, but he wasn't a hand gun guy. Even being in the army reserves when he was young, he didn't end up being a handgun guy. That changed with MLC. It went hand in hand with paranoia, I think. Made him feel more "powerful". There certainly wasn't any other attacker coming at him that wasn't internal. With your xW, it seems she doesn't feel OM can protect her...

I too think the pandemic is serving to be a good reset button on relationships that were due for a checkup. Good that you're saving days for yourself, it really does make a difference for us introverts to be able to ground and recharge.

[STP]

🎄🎄Merry Christmas!🎄🎄

Thanks for the reply R2T. I really think my XW is just unable to be as she is, and desires constant change in her pursuit of happiness. I do hope in time she bails out of her marriage. It's been 2 years already. I know she needs his money tho. I think when S19 and S21 leave the house and it's just her and work from home OM she will get antsy for big moves.

My mom wrote the family and said stay home this year for the holidays. My parents are desiring the vaccine and would hate to blow their safety before then. I have one friend who is a first responder and has taken the vaccine and am aware of a friend of a friend in the hospital since early Nov. awaiting a double lung transplant. Another close friend lost both her parents within a week of each other. The choice is out there. I will go to KAs on Christmas Eve and have my four sons over on Christmas day for a meal, football watching and presents.

Things remains quiet with friends naturally and no socializing. Just to keep it lively I sent this picture to some women friends asking if they'd ever wear such a thing? A variety of responses. DC sent me two pics of herself in a long sleeved, high neck version. MM sent me a pic of herself as a french maid instead. My relator DS mentioned one santa suit she wore in a play. Some other replies were funny. Silly stuff just to keep communication lines open.



Live it up people. These days you don't get back. Make the best of them. Have fun, laugh and smile. You're in charge of your own happiness. Be merry and bright and attract the right people to you. Have a holly jolly one.🎅