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Our Community / Re: Wife's MLC 15
« Last post by Silver on Today at 12:22:49 AM »
Yes, you deserve to be treated good gman and your peace as well.
You will feel better soon man.

The laptop story is just  :o

Our Community / Re: Happy 3rd (BD) Anniversary to Me!
« Last post by Music45 on Today at 12:16:28 AM »
But she did point out that though H "seemed" worse, that it was still "movement."
Good one to remember -  hadn't thought of it like that and agree with Shelly, we just have to go through it. Enjoy using his closet! Why not?

So great that S confides in you. Speaks volumes about your relationship with him. How lovely.

Hang in there, KiT
Our Community / Re: The Heart Behind The Hurt.
« Last post by Songanddance on May 21, 2019, 11:58:40 PM »
I am sorry for your loss Barbie.

Your post about your mother's inability to empathise with you has posed this question I have for you.

Is it possible that the loss of your close friend (who clearly provided you with genuine support and love during the MLC crisis and other life events) actually "took the role" of your mother?
Mothers are "expected" to be naturally more empathic and supportive at times like these.  If you never received that from her during your childhood is it possible that your friend became (without any overt awareness) the person your mother never could be and as you say never will be?   So is it possible that your loss is more intense because your soul, your inner child, your core is in grief?  You have lost the person who loved you unconditionally?

It's pointless trying to identify what issues your mother has but she clearly has them and sometimes people cannot talk about death because it means facing their own mortality.
Our Community / Re: He’s having a mlc 6 - Strong
« Last post by Silver on May 21, 2019, 11:48:19 PM »
Attaching, Rose the Runner
Our Community / Re: My Moving On Story pt. 3 - Under Your Scars
« Last post by Silver on May 21, 2019, 11:43:50 PM »
My thoughts on the current off topic:I'd prefer if no newbies and no one with an emotional IQ lower than 21 read my posts.  I'd like to see RCR make an icon for that so until she spends her time on that my wish ia An impossible request here so I won't participate in the theatre of the absurd any further than to say this is not Facebook where participation badges are fought over. 

Theatre of the absurd?
Labeling people with 'standers / non-standers' or 'newbies' or whatever is not needed in my opinion. Whose posts would you let newbies to read/reply to?

Labeling discussion is absurd itself and that's why people react to it.

Our Community / Re: Hunting Normal Service
« Last post by Treasur on May 21, 2019, 11:27:43 PM »
Thanks, Trust. Helps a lot.
Don't know if it was the same for you but I had no previous life experience that came even close to this. Zip. And a lot of wild thoughts and emotions and events. It helps tremendously to feel heard and validated sometimes. And to know that something weird is normal so I'm not insane...or if I am, I am in good company  :)

I do think that some of my experience has been shaded by losing my parents and my h at the same time but in different ways. That taught me how to do grief and accept loss that I couldn't control. But they are different kinds of ghosts in my head and they seem to operate differently.
Our Community / Re: He’s having a mlc 6 - Strong
« Last post by sachat3 on May 21, 2019, 11:26:35 PM »
Staying with you! I’ve already s read your threads and thought you were strong an appropriate word!
Our Community / Re: He’s having a mlc 6 - Strong
« Last post by Whyus on May 21, 2019, 11:18:47 PM »
following along rose, you are strong, you have had to be to survive.
This is no journey for the weak.
Our Community / Re: Hunting Normal Service
« Last post by Trustandlove on May 21, 2019, 11:15:15 PM »
You know what, treasur?  I still sometimes have conversations with my H in my head; those are quickly followed by a stern admonishment to myself that this accomplishes nothing, but it does still happen.

Even with someone who didn't vanish completely for a long time.  There appears to still be a part of my brain that somehow still sees "him", I mean the person I knew, not the one inhabiting his body.

I, too, have recently seen photos that show him so very different, and not in a good way, although I haven't seen him in person for over 2 years.  Yes, it helps to confirm that he is a mess, but I think that the bit that remembers what he was and could be is still strong.

Perhaps because there were a number of times during this crisis that I did see the person I knew emerge, the last time for a long period, only to run away again. 

I don't know if it helps you or not to know that it does still happen, but I do think it is normal.

Our Community / Re: They just don't understand 2
« Last post by Stand Tall on May 21, 2019, 10:27:54 PM »
So this song came across my FB today and I liked it so much I thought I would share.

  Look it up on youtube. Its by an artist named Kyle Davis and its called "Not Broken" Tell me what you think of it.
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