Well i guesse it's a good time for update as any. I started by crying and loosing myself in his crisis...jobless, hopeless and totally crashed.
Now i have my drivers license, i will start my education in February next year, i landed pretty sweet divorce deal, i had more sex in last six months than i had in years, i lost more than 30kg of weight and guys are trying to flirt with me on the street again and i landed a pretty sweet guy, whom i in love with and it's mutual. And yeah, i told my H that it's over, i still take care of him and i am around the house 2 days a week but i am never coming back, i will never forgive his choice and i don't care anymore if it's middle life crisis or not.
Him - got terribly heartbroken by OW, still sits near her everyday at his job, is super depressed, is jealous of me landing on my feet, proposed no divorce and staying together cause doesn't want to be alone ( sorry that's just heartless...) and is crying like i did at the start of it. Realises slowly what a huge mistake he made but it's too late now.
I guesse it's as good time as any to tell i am fine and i hope he will be happy one day with somebody else, because i defently am and will. I got so much better of his MLC than i was, i am strong, i am myself again, i know exactly what i want in life and i am fighting for it everyday. Yes its sad that it was never ment to last...but it's my choice, i can't forgive and i will never forget and i want to be with someone who loves me and not with a man, who is with me just because he is sacred to end up alone.
Ah and if you think that he realised much...no... it's still 50% my fault that our marriage is done.. well be it, i am learning to not care anymore. It still hearts, all the sh... he dragged me through, but i will get through it.
Thank you all for all your kind words and help, i really appreciate it, i hope that you will get to the other side of his/her MLC in one piece and have what you really want for Yourself, not for them... it was never our fault, we just cared too much for someone who was broken way before us.