For myself i do not beleive that I would not be battling jealous feelings while I was "pretending" to be evolved and accepting.
Just prior to BD#2 my H waid he had resigned himself to the fact that we were more like roommates then husband and wife. I didn't feel that way but he did. If I had not discovered the OW relationship I believe he might have stayed with me and been somewhat happy to juggle his two worlds. I do not believe I could do that.
But then again, this article is about two people who agree they no longer "love" each other as a spouse should.