[What What is the status of your wedding ring?]

What What is the status of your wedding ring?

Still wear your wedding ring

42 (35.3%)

If not is it on a necklace, other hand or something

6 (5%)

Have it safely tucked away

60 (50.4%)

Gave it back

7 (5.9%)

Never had one never needed one

4 (3.4%)

Total Members Voted: 118

[doodlebug65]

I took mine off after he left in November.  I just felt like it was a symbol of something that was dead so I took it off.  Lately I catch myself feeling for it but I'm sure it's just a reflex.

[VoleInABox]

We were never religious about wearing ours, so when he left his at home about a week before BD I didn't think anything of it, but put it in his drawer. Only after BD did I realise that it was still in the same place... So I chucked mine in the same drawer where they sit together in the darkness for the time being.

[flying solo]

I took my wedding ring off at BD 2 at beginning of Feb 13. I told H that the marriage it represented was dead and always would be for me so it was irrelevant. He always wore his wedding band (in my company) throughout his crisis.

When we 'reconnected' in October 13 I still refused to wear my original wedding band and this upset him no-end. He bought me a new platinum and gold ring from Tiffany at the end of November and I wear this with pride because I chose it and love it! (at the moment!). He wears my original on his little finger as he says it still means so much to him that it was blessed at our wedding (screams of MLC), so whatever floats his boat is ok for me right now. He seems to accept and understand that the ring he wears of mine is just a lump of gold in my eyes, but to him it is much more than that - again, making me see that he is still in the midst of his crisis!

Hopefully I will be able to post in the future that the original ring is either melted down or in a drawer which will signify that his crisis is over and done with as it will NEVER be put back on the third finger of my left hand - I haven't verbalised this to him yet but watch this space haha!

[Hmmm]

Not long after BD I got a swollen knuckle and physically couldn't get mine off!! When I did, I started to wear them on the other hand.

He asked about it and said it was my body saying it was allergic to him!

I wear them fine now and he was wearing his on his last visit a month ago. Never thought about it before but will check he still is on Saturday. Would love to know if he wears it with OW but can't ask as he will go into monster, not admit to having OW and start saying I'm messing with his mind

[Hmmm]

This forum gave me the idea of asking about his ring when he visited last week. He does wear it when away. I asked why and he said because he's married but it hurts him to wear it. He sounded really in pain about it. This piece of metal hurts me or something like that.

So strange

[Darth Obo]

We both still wear ours....have never taken them off except when doing housework, cleaning etc. I would never permanently remove mine while I am still standing. I think I would always wear it regardless, if even on the right hand or on a chain. The ring means more to me than just a marriage; it symbolizes our union & the family we have built together which will always be a part of me.

We had bought new bands for our 21st wedding anniversary; about 3 months prior to BD. When this all happened I asked her what she was thinking when we bought them. She said she felt like such a fraud at the time. I asked then why does she still wear it; said she didn't know.

We had a small blow-out last week I mentioned in my thread; I lost my cool for a couple minutes and told her she may as well take them off since they seem to mean nothing to her. She burst into tears and held it onto her finger with her right hand; like she thought I was going to take it from her. I don't like reading into things, but tells me it does mean something to her!

She had them off all day yesterday since we were doing some project stuff; had them right back on this morning. Ironically, they the only rings she wears now. She use to wear rings on both hands; now the ONLY rings she wears since the crisis started is the wedding band(s). Interesting!


OneBYOne

[Albatross]

New topic

http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=5076.0