Hey Help,
So it's the end of the road.... I'm so sorry..... it sounds very terrible what you have been thru.
You did try, and did all you could. It may not seem like anything right happened.... but years from now, when the kids are older, they will ask and you'll be able to say (honestly) that you tried with all your might. How much better when they come to understand this, rather than thinking you gave up and sold them short?
No Help..... you did right. No what-if's. That's important. You're clean.
-SS