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Author Topic: MLC Monster When They Have a Child Together

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MLC Monster Re: When They Have a Child Together
#30: May 16, 2012, 07:00:24 PM
We should?...  ::) Really?  ::)Or I (you) want?...  ;) Star, are you sure you want to ask him if you not being able to give him a child was the reason for him to leave? What if the answer is no? You will be looking for something else. What if it is yes? If it is yes, how si that going to make you feel any better? Why do want to know? To beat yourself up? Or because it will bring you some closure?

He may get along pretty well with Op. At least for now. All is still very fresh, new baby. But in every couple life there are good and bad times and you know it. Can’’t see anything good it allowing a partner to do whatever they feel. Whatever you have done or not done would always be a problem. Remember you are not the problem, the crisis is.

I think that was what she wrote, yet. It is somewhere on the articles of the main site or on a blog post. Maybe DGU can help you finding it out.



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Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)
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Re: When They Have a Child Together
#31: May 16, 2012, 09:30:02 PM

Yeah, I know. ::)  And it took like 2o minutes to think of those two words too, lol. What can I say? I do not possess the gift of good communication. I meant that 'we should'... we should talk.


I think he'll say "no". He'll say, as he said when I spoke to him last time, that this has nothing to do with me. But still, I would like to see what he says.


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Why do want to know?


I just feel like I deserve some truth. This is a huge question for me. I gave him / our relationship so much of myself but I was unable to give this to him and to me. My only agenda is to get the truth which, I understand, I may never get. His truth has always been elusive to me... He was always very secretive with his emotions, etc. Maybe he learned something in all of this and maybe he'll finally be able to say something to me, maybe not, maybe not yet.

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He may get along pretty well with Op. At least for now. All is still very fresh, new baby. But in every couple life there are good and bad times and you know it. Can’’t see anything good it allowing a partner to do whatever they feel. Whatever you have done or not done would always be a problem. Remember you are not the problem, the crisis is.


I have a very vague idea about what they might be like. I'm guesstimating. I give it the benefit of the doubt because I don't seek out information about them in any way. It really doesn't help me to assume the worst for them.

He never did get back to me anyway but... when I sent the email... my two words got mixed in with his previous email ( I don't know how that happened, lol - I'm email inept this month ) so the email I sent him appeared blank. ::)  I'm leaving it alone. ::)  As you can tell... I can't take this anymore. I am lbs nuts!
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« Last Edit: May 16, 2012, 09:40:35 PM by ✩StarGazerGirl✩ »
Me 35 ~ Pisces   
Him 37 ~ Gemini 
I was 13 ~ he was 15 ~ Together for 19 years. Doomed from the start?
We never married ~ no children ~ two cats ~ Bomb Drop ~ 6/22/09 ~ he left to be w/ the Op & Op's kid
Atomic Bomb Drop ~ 3/22/12 ~ found out they had a child in early February, 2012 ( 2 weeks before my BDay )

In 100 years, none of this will matter but time is still. (( hugs & prayers to all ))
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Re: When They Have a Child Together
#32: May 17, 2012, 04:16:33 AM
 StarGazer, Hugs! This rollercoaster is so hard. Think of the baby as a corvette. He had to have one it's so great! ::) :P Sure. Baby with a stranger in a MLC. OK? ???
 As far as 'we should talk' he doesn't know what he wants or what he had for breakfast :o :o That question makes them like  :o :o :o :o :o. Somehow my H thinks I could be friends with his OW bc she's innocent in all this :o :o
 Just carry on with your journey knowing he's not right at the moment and he needs to go through all of this to find out! Remember in this state of MLC tunnel he can't have an R with anyone.. He really can't. ::)
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Re: When They Have a Child Together
#33: May 18, 2012, 07:11:59 AM



Hey Mamma! I know... you're right. Poor baby though. :(  I wasn't a stranger and I think I would have made a nice mom. :(  But it's O.k. :'(


He did answer me. This time he said "when?" lol. I don't know. No matter what.. He opened pandoras box and nothing in the world can change this.


Oh, H said to me in the beginning that I would Like Op and that we could all be friends. He shared with me a vision he had of us having happy Bar-b-q's where he would be with the Op and I would be with a new boyfriend. :o Like couple friends.
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Me 35 ~ Pisces   
Him 37 ~ Gemini 
I was 13 ~ he was 15 ~ Together for 19 years. Doomed from the start?
We never married ~ no children ~ two cats ~ Bomb Drop ~ 6/22/09 ~ he left to be w/ the Op & Op's kid
Atomic Bomb Drop ~ 3/22/12 ~ found out they had a child in early February, 2012 ( 2 weeks before my BDay )

In 100 years, none of this will matter but time is still. (( hugs & prayers to all ))
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