Author Topic: My Story More Good Wolf for a Good Life...  (Read 2762 times)

Offline DianaDeBelflor

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My Story Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #10 on: May 21, 2018, 11:06:55 AM »
You are one classy lady, Treasur. I hope I'll have your grace some day.

I don't think there is a middle ground with the letter you sent. It will either connect with her and she will reach out to you or she will not believe a word that is written in it. The fact that you wrote it and sent it says a lot about you, I think. How she will respond will say a lot about her.

Now that you are closing this chapter of your life, any thoughts about dating?

Offline Mortesbride

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #11 on: May 21, 2018, 12:16:47 PM »
I'm baaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaack.  8)

Sorry taking a bit of a MLC sabbatical or whatever. I am pretty amazed at how much work you have done in your little allotment, along with the buisness...and clients...and house hunting.

Maybe you can hook up my garden in October.  ;)

I really hope that she responds to that email, and that it is mostly positive. I imagine even if she does, it will take her some time before she writes back. Getting something so heartfelt out of the blue will take a few days to really sink in.

Anyway glad to see there are no new watchgates kicking off for you.

How are your calves looking? They must be looking spectacular with all that pedalling!

Offline KeepItTogether

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #12 on: May 21, 2018, 05:14:37 PM »
Beautiful letter T. I can’t imagine this will not affect her, though she may not be in a place to respond just yet.

Loving your garden. Amazing what you’ve already accomplished.

Me 46
H 45
S11
BD 5/16
H Moved out 6/16
OW--yes. Worked for H. EA turned into PA while I was in chemo.

Online TreasurTopic starter

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #13 on: May 21, 2018, 10:22:08 PM »
Thanks Diana, Morte and KiT

I wrote the letter for me really. I needed to say goodbye to yet one more person I loved, even if she feels no need to do the same. I expect to hear nothing at all, same as with XH. It was much more about my finding peace with it all and wanting to tell her that I loved and treasured her, that she mattered to me. I have no idea how or even if she will read it. It was triggered by some of the clearing out of stuff here, another bit of letting go of old treasures to make space for new ones.

Yup, I am making real progress here finally. I'm excited about the old chapel and probably already living in it in my head. The allotment strangely has been a bit of a mental life-saver. Something about the combo of hard physical effort, being outside with dirty hands and the metaphor of clearing a space to grow something new. And dating, Diana? I don't know. I'm not sure I want to although I miss sex and the light fun of spending time in male company. I noticed last week that the chap who had come to fit the gull strips (and accidentally damaged my car) was flirting with me. Mind you it took me 12 hours to realise that... ::)  I don't need the affirmation from it and I'm not sure I'm ready yet to invest the energy in getting to know someone closely. I do see myself as single but I'm not interested in remarrying, or even living with someone else again. I do feel attractive but I don't know, just not in that space yet. A lot of chaps my age seem so much older than me which is ridiculous but how I feel. I guess I'll know when I am ready to open that door...or if someone interesting knocks on it  ;).
« Last Edit: May 21, 2018, 10:30:31 PM by Treasur »
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD)
No kids.
BD Oct 15. OW since Apr 16?
H filed Jan 17. Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.

Grateful for any appearance of the tiny karma bus  
"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

Offline serenity

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #14 on: May 21, 2018, 11:40:24 PM »
Just stopping by to say hi

And wish you lots of luck with your impending move. It sounds perfect and just the sort of place that I love too!

It’s daunting, scary but very exciting too. I’m feeling same Treasur as I’ve now found a lovely house to move to. I had my meeting with my solicitor yesterday and even she commented how pretty it was which made me smile. It all seems too good to be true atm!

I wish you well. We both have a challenging and exciting time ahead!

Hugs

X

Offline UrsaMajor

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #15 on: May 22, 2018, 04:37:10 AM »
THAT's "my" Bishop!

The power of Redemptive Love...... On one side, there are no limits to what it can accomplish but on the other side, even with redemptive love, there is a limit to what WE, as humans, can accept....
Me - 54
MLC - 47
Together 20 years - Married for 17 at separation
S - 11
D - 7
2 Canines (each of us has one)
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold and separated - March 2016
Mid-Lifer is initiating D

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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

Offline FearNot

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #16 on: May 22, 2018, 08:25:41 AM »
Attaching T! What a wonderful allotment and blog! Such an inspiration.  :D

I can understand why you feel the need to send the your email, and I do hope you get a response. If not, it's a great way to end a chapter and continue on with your story!
M 46
H 39
No Kids
Married 5yrs, Together 11yrs
BD Oct 31/17
ILYBINILWY Dec 21/17
2nd BD- Dec 27/17
OW-Confirmed Jan 3/17

 Isaiah 43:1 " But the Lord says.. Fear not, for I have redeemed you; I have summoned you by name; you are mine. "

"It's ok to be scared. Being scared means you're about to do something really, really brave." Anonymous

Offline Dumbfounded

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #17 on: May 22, 2018, 08:31:34 AM »
Attaching...
Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

Online Nerissa

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #18 on: May 22, 2018, 10:59:36 AM »
I like your gardening blog.  I hope you get a reply to your letter.  What is wrong with people?  She should know better.

Offline DianaDeBelflor

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Re: More Good Wolf for a Good Life...
« Reply #19 on: May 22, 2018, 05:04:38 PM »
And dating, Diana? I don't know. I'm not sure I want to although I miss sex and the light fun of spending time in male company. I noticed last week that the chap who had come to fit the gull strips (and accidentally damaged my car) was flirting with me. Mind you it took me 12 hours to realise that... ::)  I don't need the affirmation from it and I'm not sure I'm ready yet to invest the energy in getting to know someone closely. I do see myself as single but I'm not interested in remarrying, or even living with someone else again. I do feel attractive but I don't know, just not in that space yet. A lot of chaps my age seem so much older than me which is ridiculous but how I feel. I guess I'll know when I am ready to open that door...or if someone interesting knocks on it  ;).
That's kind of where I am, honestly. I have no wish to rush into another relationship since I kind of live with a daily reminder of what that looks like. I have never been into casual sex, so that's probably out of the question. So... what's left? I donno. But today I had a lazy morning and laid with my legs up on my upholstered headboard... and I thought about how good it was to be in this bed alone. I didn't want my husband there or anyone else. It was just nice to be alone.

If all else fails, I'll get a 4th cat, female this time, and call her Ginsburg. (If you haven't seen Book Club, you absolutely must!)

By the way, I have to say that after my great-grandfather died, my great-grandmother spent some quality time dating men 10 years her junior (from what I understand, great-grandpa wasn't even cold yet). So, what I'm saying is that there is no reason why a good-looking in-shape woman cannot date (or... barely date) younger men if men her age seem a little dowdy. If she wants to.  ;D

 

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