Author Topic: My Story Ready for a New Word  (Read 2519 times)

Offline stillbaffled

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My Story Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #10 on: November 12, 2018, 03:37:02 PM »

Anyway, I drained the toilet again, made a pork loin for diner and folded laundry.  We are back to the toilet drawing board. 
     

So a very successful day then, DF!   ;)

I have said many times since MLCer ran away that YouTube quite suddenly became one of my closest friends.   

I'll see your gasket and raise you re-seating a tire on a rim with a ratchet strap! 
After all, tomorrow is another day.
Together 16 years - married 6
BD - 1/1/16
His divorce final 7/16
Married OW - 7/17
a consistent semi-vanisher in the same small town

Online KeepItTogether

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #11 on: November 12, 2018, 04:10:06 PM »
I love it DF! You really are a bada$$. And yes Still, isn't it amazing what we can actually do when we have no one to rely  on but ourselves?  I was even half afraid of changing some of the lightbulbs!  But hey, over it now. We got this.


MOO2s mom crying in church. I mean just wow. If that isn't telling I don't know what is.

Anyway, I love your attitude and want to get there so bad.  I need to drop that rope....again. I like that you are letting people in. I think I may be at the place to shut some out tho. And boy do I hear you on the dating. Who has time for that? Oh right, mlcers.


Sounding awesome DF.
Me 47
H 46
S12
BD 5/16
H Moved out 6/16
OW--yes. Worked for H. EA turned into PA while I was in chemo. On again/off again like every high school romance

Offline DumbfoundedTopic starter

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #12 on: November 14, 2018, 10:17:41 AM »
VENTING....

Just had an e-mail from the accountant. They have submitted the DRAFT Order to divide up the retirement money 3 times with no response. So infuriating.  In addition, LB hasn't yet signed the Deed over to me despite his co-parenting messages saying he would. Can't refinance. Interest rates are going up.

It is like he is "divorced enough" and doesn't want to go through with the part of his divorce where I get half.

He is also ignoring his 1/2 payment for D's junior class trip. Well, D is all happy because he gave her $200.00 for her birthday (2 weeks late) which she plans to use to buy a blanket for her horse.  Lots of grumbling under my breath here. 

AHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH!!   
Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

Online KeepItTogether

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #13 on: November 14, 2018, 10:22:45 AM »
Oh girl, vent away. They are allergic to anything that requires even the slightest bit of responsibility. So frustrating. If he is technically in default under the agreement by not complying, what are your options? Hopefully you (through your L bc you don’t need that bs in your life) can force him into it.

Divorced enough. That is funny. However I suspect also this is a bit of him hanging onto the last DF thread he has. Whether he is aware of it or not....
Me 47
H 46
S12
BD 5/16
H Moved out 6/16
OW--yes. Worked for H. EA turned into PA while I was in chemo. On again/off again like every high school romance

Offline DumbfoundedTopic starter

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #14 on: November 14, 2018, 10:38:15 AM »
Oh I have already sent an e-mail to my lawyer who is currently on vacation.  I will have a Guardian Ad Litem appointed to sign the Deed and approve the Order if I have to go there. I got two more month of selfish in me. I am sure of it.

He can hang on all he wants, or retaliate for my holding the car title, or try to destroy me, or try to keep his fair share or whatever he is trying to do.... but WE are not half a$$ing this divorce. We are doing ALL. THE. STEPS. if I have to drag him through the mud to get us there and write "FINISHED" on his forehead in sharpie marker.     

 
Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

Offline Treasur

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #15 on: November 14, 2018, 10:50:03 AM »
Bizarre how so many do this isn't it, DF? As you say 'divorced enough'...tbh, I think they sort of mentally divorce us at BD and then find the grown up stuff really irritating. Like if they say it in their head, kapow, good enough  ::)

Chuckled at the idea of a sharpie though...hmm indelible one presumably...bet we can all think of a few good words for that  :)
« Last Edit: November 14, 2018, 10:51:15 AM by Treasur »
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD)
No kids.
BD Oct 15. OW since Apr 16?
H filed Jan 17. Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.

Grateful for any appearance of the tiny karma bus  
"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

Offline cowgirlslayer

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #16 on: November 14, 2018, 11:31:00 AM »
I had to giggle at the image of me hogtying my STBX and writing DONE on his forehead in permanent marker!! Made my day! I so want to do that!

I think you are right - they feel divorced so they act like they are and feel like they are but don't handle the pesky little details like getting an agreed order for child support signed or answering emails from their attorney - why should they? In their mine everything is done. They have moved on.
M-48
H-43
D-13
Married 18 years - together 20
BD - 7/17
ILYBINILWY - 7/17
Asked for Divorce - 9/17
Sold home and moved out  - 1/18

Offline Helpingme!

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #17 on: November 14, 2018, 03:30:09 PM »
DF
The D part for them is the I'm free feeling they get. The rest of the D is reality. They don't like that one bit.
Vent away DF.

Offline stillbaffled

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #18 on: November 14, 2018, 07:30:19 PM »
I keep a large variety of colored sharpies in my office.  Let me know what color you'd like. 
After all, tomorrow is another day.
Together 16 years - married 6
BD - 1/1/16
His divorce final 7/16
Married OW - 7/17
a consistent semi-vanisher in the same small town

Online KeepItTogether

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Re: Ready for a New Word
« Reply #19 on: November 14, 2018, 09:11:54 PM »
Maybe we could go in on a stamp together. Maybe get a group rate.
Me 47
H 46
S12
BD 5/16
H Moved out 6/16
OW--yes. Worked for H. EA turned into PA while I was in chemo. On again/off again like every high school romance

 

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