Author Topic: My Story  Growth For A New Half Century  (Read 3204 times)

Offline LearningIamOk

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My Story Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #40 on: January 25, 2019, 03:49:58 PM »
I also agree that the Silver Linings come at a very high price. But honestly, you get what you pay for. :) I am happy with my purchase.

Anjae, you were saying that you couldn't understand how the MLCer could give up a decades old life just like that, and not be able to let go of the MLC life. Maybe their MLC will equal the time of the old life. If that's the case, My xH won't be out of the Tunnel until he's 80-85. So he's got a good 20 years to go. Glad I'm not waiting.
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Offline AnjaeTopic starter

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #41 on: January 25, 2019, 04:01:20 PM »
But honestly, you get what you pay for. :) I am happy with my purchase.

So far, I have not got what I payed for.  ::) I am certain I will and that it will be great. It has to be, the price for me was extraordinarily high :)

I don't think MLC equates the time of the old life. It certainly didn't for many of the ones reconciled or in reconnection.

If in Mr J's case if will, he will 56 when out of the tunnel. He was 36 (36, good grief!) when he got inside. I am also not waiting, I am living.  :) I just have no idea where the future will lead. Not a problem, one day at a time is fine with me.  :)
Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)

Offline AnjaeTopic starter

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #42 on: January 26, 2019, 02:23:47 PM »
Something is going on with Mr J. What, I don't know. He posted lots of items for sale, and was silly enough to tag people I am friends with, which means I see what he is selling. Several of the items he is selling are ours, furniture, appliances that didn't use to be on his house with OW2. The other stuff he is selling also isn't what he used to have when living with OW2. One thing of the several he is selling is his beloved vintage night table lamp, that he has since he was a kid. That lamp was not in his and OW2's flat.

He cannot sell, or give, anything that belongs to the two of us. I will e-mail him about the matter early next week, during business hours, with Cc to my lawyer. Not going to contact on a weekend.

Why is he selling all that stuff, including the one that is ours and now is in the house he lives (stuff he spend years either denying he had or not saying he had) is a mystery.

As is what is happening and why the place is mostly a mess. Suitcases and boxes in piles, everything looking shabby. He is either moving (again) or he needs money, which I doubt.

If he is moving, why sell items that would be of need? His he moving in with someone? OW2? A new OW? I don't know. Does he have to rent a room, or a couple of rooms, in someone's house? I don't know. His he moving to a place that comes with everything? I don't know. I know that the bed he is selling is not the one from when he lived with OW2 and that there is only one nightstand. When they lived together there were two.

Something is up. He also cut is hair, the way he used to have it before MLC. Except now he looks very strange and not at all like himsel since he is bloated. He is impossible to recognise.

It is all quite bizarre. Does anyone has any idea what may be going on? Probably nothing. Just another step in Mr J's long MLC journey.

As for how do I feel. The same. I didn't had any reaction to see our things I hadn't saw in ages nor to the fact that he is selling them. I only found the whole thing intriguing.
Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)

Online Mitzpah

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #43 on: January 26, 2019, 02:45:32 PM »
Very strange...

Although, I would not worry too much about what he is selling unless, of course,  it is worth good money and belongs to you too. Is it really necessary to contact your lawyer?

Perhaps he is going through a phase of detachment and wants to give up all material belongings... ???
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"For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" Jeremiah 29:11

Offline serenity

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #44 on: January 26, 2019, 02:52:44 PM »
Hello Anjae,

I wondered whether it’s all over with OW? Maybe they’ve split up and he’s downsizing?!? Or could he be unwell and just wanting to get rid of ‘things’

My H no longer likes much stuff around

My own home is full of stuff! My excuse is that it’s my business so theres always stock around!

I suppose all you can do is keep watching and see what happens

Hugs

X

Offline AnjaeTopic starter

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #45 on: January 26, 2019, 03:10:35 PM »
Hi Mitz and Serenity,

Some of the furniture and appliances belong to the two of us. The rest of the stuff is his. One of the sideboards Mr J wants to sell, that is ours, has (or used to have) my heirloom. I see no pictures of the heirloom for sale. My main concern is what he did to it.

The money he will make from our things may not me much, but it would be handy to me. And, if he does not give it to me now, he will have to do it later on. He cannot sell/give away any joint property without consulting me first.

I always let my lawyer know since joint property remains legally ours and I do not my lawyer to later say: you never said anything. One of us acting like it is fine to sell joint property is enough.

He is not giving up all material possessions. He is selling several Ikea shelves that are often used to records and ordering custom ones. He is not selling a single record and he has thousands of them.

He is selling the only fridge and washing machine on his kitchen, his bed, his nightstand, his nightstand lamp (the one he has had since a kid), the shelves, the sideboard, etc. The sideboard he may do without. But, bed, fridge, washing machine? The fridge is ours. Dead expensive fancy one, vintage looking. His and OW2's one was white and ordinary.

It is not only that he is selling things, is that several of the things have been gone for years, and now they are in his home and he is selling them.

He is also not selling the tons of small stuff he has. Be it records, memorabilia, art pieces, decoration pieces. And he is indeed ordering custom shelves for the records.

I can say nothing, keep the photos and date of selling and let it be. Providing he does not get rid of my heirloom. That is irreplacable. Since he is selling his beloved lamp (it was from one of his grandfathers) who is to say he will not sell my things as well?

OW2 is most certainly gone. She is a desing and order freak. She would never live in that house. Either that, or he is moving in with her. She has a new flat.

It is all very odd.
« Last Edit: January 26, 2019, 03:12:39 PM by Anjae »
Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)

Offline AnjaeTopic starter

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #46 on: January 28, 2019, 12:40:20 PM »
I have decided not to e-mail Mr J about the furniture and appliances he is selling, even if some are ours and at least one sideboard mine.

He didn't told me he was selling them, therefore, he either wants a reaction, or most likely, since those things stayed in the flat after I left thinks they become just his (he have no document saying how things should be split, everything that is/was joint, remains joint).

I keep the evidence. Will always be able to ask for my half of the money at a later date.

Maybe in a couple of weeks I will e-mail regarding my heirloom, which is my main concern.

I still have no idea what is going on with him. It is all quite strange.
Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)

Online Treasur

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #47 on: January 28, 2019, 12:51:57 PM »
Why not just send a short factual email saying that you have heard he is selling things and you would like the heirloom back as he is apparently getting rid of things and bcc your L? If it is important to you not sure of the reason to wait really. He will respond or not as he chooses, I guess.
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.
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Offline AnjaeTopic starter

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #48 on: January 28, 2019, 01:07:05 PM »
That is what I was going to do. I have the e-mail written, bcc to my lawyer. I can send it. No problem with it.

The not sending was just because it may lead to monster. But, to be fair, it makes no sense  to say nothing. If he does not answer the e-mail, at least it is documented I sent it.
Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)

Online Treasur

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Re: Growth For A New Half Century
« Reply #49 on: January 28, 2019, 01:31:35 PM »
Makes sense, Anjae.
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.
Healing and growing found here https://littleplotbythesea.wordpress.com

"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

 

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