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Author Topic: My Story The Positives XXIII

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My Story Re: The Positives XXIII
#50: January 30, 2019, 01:07:26 AM
🤣ha ha

Love it Ursa! You’re just too funny!

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#51: January 30, 2019, 02:27:45 AM
Funny, UM!!
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Married 1989, together since 1984 
BD May 2014,
D25, D22, S15
OW Physical Affair same one. He and she said she turned 34 the month of BD. She turned 52 this year.

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#52: January 30, 2019, 08:21:16 AM
Love reading this💕

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Hurting people hurt people :(

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#53: March 14, 2019, 01:57:01 PM
Just bumping my thread up as not posted much lately...

I’ve been a bit allover the place really. Trying to keep busy and try lots new things. I can’t believe it’s three years since my mum passed away and I’m still struggling to try and sort her estate out. It’s so stressful and I’m tired of feeling stressed, worried and tense. It just makes me feel ill now.

Anyway I have some positive new about a newish friend. I’ve been trying to help her as her H is in MLC. She’s between the 4/5 year mark. He’s been living with OW for a year. There was a bitter divorce going on but the last couple weeks her H has been making big attempts to go home. It’s lovely to hear a positive story with a potential happy outcome. I’ve warned her that he may retreat. He has so far followed everything I said he’d do. My new friend has been amazed that I’ve been so spot on. I felt a bit glum today so it was good to hear this news.

My news is that I’m planning a family holiday in the summer. So me, my children and hopefully granddaughter can be together by the sea. I planned as usual to put my doggy into kennels. I was quite annoyed to find out that my H has spoken to our children and say he’ll look after my dog! I haven’t spoken to him since January after I found out he was messing around again and told him I could no longer be in his life. He’s said nothing to me about my dog and it’s made me mad that he’s said this to our children! They seem to see this as a nice offer! I don’t. They may want to see him and be sympathetic towards him but I don’t! It just feels like he’s trying to manipulate the situation to his advantage. It was his birthday recently and for the first time ever, I ignored it! It was hard as my dear little granddaughter rang me and told me it was grandads birthday and they’d got birthday cake and could I go too as they were going to have a party. I had to tell her I couldn’t go!

Anyway life is busy atm so I’ll keep trundling on

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#54: March 14, 2019, 02:12:28 PM
Serenity thanks for the update. Lovely to hear the good story about your new friend. It always helps to get a little good news around here.

Sorry that you're still feeling the loss of your mother. I think that being alone makes these losses even harder.

I'm not surprised you ignored your H's birthday. I do believe he will want to come back for good at some point, but he's had a bit of cake recently and then dumped you again when who knows what went off in his head. I'm glad he didn't get to have you on his birthday. He doesn't deserve you at the moment.
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Married 1989, together since 1984 
BD May 2014,
D25, D22, S15
OW Physical Affair same one. He and she said she turned 34 the month of BD. She turned 52 this year.

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#55: March 14, 2019, 02:17:22 PM
Thank you Milly.

Lovely to hear from you and I appreciate your thoughts.

I took myself out for tea today as a little treat and got talking to a very interesting man so we ended up having tea together as we were both there alone!

Next week a friend has planned a blind date for me! Thankfully her and her H are coming along as well though!

Hope you’re doing ok?

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#56: March 14, 2019, 03:23:43 PM
Thank you for the update, Serenity.

Nice to read about your new friend't story. Savy's also has a friend whose sister has good news.

I am sorry you're feeling a bit all over the place and still miss your mother. I think we always miss our parents/those close to us who are gone.

Are you comfortable leaving your dog with husband? Given his recent antics, no surprise you didn't which him happy birthday.

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Sometimes good things fall apart so better things can fall together. (Marilyn Monroe)

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#57: March 14, 2019, 03:34:13 PM
Hello dear Anjae

Thanks for stopping by.

I have no intention of leaving my dog with my H. I know she doesn’t like the kennels and it’s expensive but at least I have the security of knowing that it’s definite. My H could potentially pull out at the last minute and then I’d be stuck plus I don’t wish to see him! I felt he was being manipulative talking to the children about the dog and not me!

I don’t miss my mother, we never got on and she wasn’t nice to me at all. I’m struggling with her estate which is very complicated and stressful and I’m just finding it all too much. I think I’ve just reached a point of stress overload and maybe with the menopause I’m finding it hard to cope anymore.

I hope you’re doing ok?

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#58: March 14, 2019, 03:41:54 PM
Tea 'date' sounded lovely  :)
Yup, after an MLC divorce, I think I am allergic to lawyers and legal paperwork now...it gets very wearing.

And actually, whatever your h was before, he is now literally not good enough to look after your dog  :)
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H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.
Healing and growing found here https://littleplotbythesea.wordpress.com

"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#59: March 14, 2019, 03:43:18 PM
Serenity, regarding your mother, I wasn't close to mine either and was not affected emotionally when she died. I sound horrible, I suspect. I am envious when I read of people who greatly miss their mothers when they die. Although it has to be so hard to lose a mother who was wonderful, at least they had that good mother. My mother was a crazy, selfish, alcoholic who ran our family like a dictator. We were terrified of her.

Dealing with an inheritance is a nightmare. I went through that, too. I got screwed over. I fought it for a couple of years and then gave up.

I understand about your dog. A couple of years ago, I asked H to look after our dog to save the hassle and money of putting her in kennels, but H left her locked inside on her own in the dark and my dog went mad. I will never trust him with her again. You are right to book the kennel.
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Married 1989, together since 1984 
BD May 2014,
D25, D22, S15
OW Physical Affair same one. He and she said she turned 34 the month of BD. She turned 52 this year.

 

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