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Author Topic: My Story The Positives XXIII

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My Story Re: The Positives XXIII
#60: March 14, 2019, 03:45:12 PM
It is what I thought about leaving the dog with husband. He is probably not reliable. The kennels are and you know everything is properly being taken care.

I am sorry, I misunderstood about your mum. Dealing with an estate can be exhausting. For a LBS who already had been dealing with so much, it is another layer of stress that does not to help us.

Stress overload is dangerous, Serenity. Can you take some time off dealing with your mum's estate? Menopaus, or peri-menopause in my case, can make everything harder. Some people have no issues with peri-menopause or menopause, so far I am the first woman in the family for whom it is being a problem. Others face a very hard time.

As with everything, one day at a time and focus as much on yourself as possible.

I am fine. :)

Hugs,

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#61: March 15, 2019, 12:51:52 AM
Thank you dear friends,

Dear Anjae, I’ve been feeling so unwell and I know stress is at the root of it. I just simply don’t seem to be able to cope anymore. I’ve had way to much to deal with in the last 7 1/2 years and I’m surprised I’m still standing tbh. At this present time I can’t step back from my mothers stuff and my sister isnt helping and adding to my stress. She’s like my mother and an unpleasant, unhelpful and bullying individual.

Inside I just want to run away. Every health issue I have has flared up and I’m having so many migraines too. This is definitely a menopause thing. I’m trying to eat, sleep, excercise and take vitamins but I’m not on top of this relentless stress as yet.

Thank you for being here and supporting me X

Milly,
It was a relief to read that you also didn’t get along with your mother. I always feel so guilty saying I never liked her but she really wasn’t a nice or good person. She was selfish and everything was to suit her. I got no sympathy from her when my life was blown apart and she used to manipulate me and do all sorts of things to upset me. She also was an alcoholic.

I’m sorry to hear about your inheritance. How on earth did you not get it?

A couple of times I have let H look after my dog and she either got terrified by being left alone on fireworks  night and another time he let her run off out of his front door! Apart from the fact I don’t wish to see him, he’s irresponsible X

Treasur, thank you - you made me chuckle.

Looking forward to meeting up soon. Sorry if you’re not too good either

Hugs

X


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Re: The Positives XXIII
#62: March 15, 2019, 01:34:45 AM
Hi Serenity,

I'll only respond to the dog thing - Mom's are a different story and mine is still alive and kicking...

One of STBX's "Reasons to D du Jour" was that I would not get rid of my dog when she wanted me to .... NOW that we have been seperrated for 3 years, she had the gall to ask if she could take my dog for a walk and try to "work" with her.  Uhhhhh,.... NO... Because she watches Caeser Milan non-stop and reads his books, she is now a dog expert <smh> (in her own mind)....

This is the same woman who's previous dog tore up a neighbor's dog after STBX let her run off the leash although STBX KNEW that her dog did not play well with others...

I too bring mine to a kennel when I can't take her on holiday with us and had to try a couple before I found one that was good....

Just saying that I can understand that you have no intention of housing your doggie with MLCH.  And, it WAS manipulative for him to talk to the kids about it and not you... He's trying to make himself looke like the good guy and you being the stubborn one that won't let him do what he wants (like eat cake.)....
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Re: The Positives XXIII
#63: March 15, 2019, 07:14:20 AM
Thank you Ursa

You’re thoughts are the same as mine! I felt that H telling the kids he’d have my dog whilst we all went away was indeed playing the good dad! He could just have easily spoken to me but he hasn’t!

Considering the dog lives with me it seems bizarre he’s telling them!

I’m sure at the moment I look the difficult, awkward one because I don’t want to play ball!

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#64: March 15, 2019, 08:01:06 AM

 I felt that H telling the kids he’d have my dog whilst we all went away was indeed playing the good dad! He could just have easily spoken to me but he hasn’t!

Considering the dog lives with me it seems bizarre he’s telling them!

I’m sure at the moment I look the difficult, awkward one because I don’t want to play ball!

X

Serenity,

I feel with you about the dog! Perhaps you could turn it around and tell your kids that you don't want to bother their dad  :P with caring for doggie and that it is easier to kennel it  :) - then you will be the good mum!
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Re: The Positives XXIII
#65: March 15, 2019, 08:38:15 AM
Brilliant Mitz,

Thank you - I love that! 😁

Do hope your health is improving now?

Hugs

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#66: March 15, 2019, 12:50:01 PM
Dear Serenity,

I am sorry you are feeling so unwell. Have you seen your doctor?

Glad to know you're trying to eat, sleeep and exercise. Regarding exercise, mild/in moderation, it is excellent, more than that it raises adrenaline that in turn raises stress levels.

When we're stressed we have to be caferul with the type of exercise. Are you able to medidate? It may help reduce stress.

Even if you can't back from your mum's stuff, is it possible to back away for a weekend or a few days?

Stress coped with menopause, or peri-menopause, will raise and blow every health issue we have.

Hugs

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#67: March 16, 2019, 02:36:15 PM
Thank you dear Anjae,

I haven’t been to my doctors. I don’t have much faith in them and I have to wait 3 weeks for an appt!

I just try and sort myself out as much as I can

I go to yoga which seems to be the only thing that relaxes me atm. I would love to try meditation but not really sure as to where to start. I’m just doing a lot of walking and I’m swimming more as well.

I always thought the physical aspects of menopause were the worst but I’ve come to realise the mental ones can actually be even worse!

I just hope this phase will pass at some point but I feel sure ongoing stresses just exasperate my symptoms!

Hugs

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#68: March 16, 2019, 03:29:12 PM
I get not trusting doctors. They often don't seem to be of much use with peri-menopause of menopause. But they are able to prescribe meds for stress/anxiety that may be of help.

They can also request blood tests and other sort of tests that may help to have a better view of the situation.

The mental, and often, emotional side or peri-menopause or menopause is has bad as the physicall one. Foggy thinking, forgetfulness, lack of concentration, etc.

Today, for the first time since a little while after grandmother's death body was tired and aching. The matter seemed to had been resolved with bananas and magnesium, but I didn't like the reminder.

I like Oprah and Deepak guided meditations. There will be a new one starting 25 March: https://chopracentermeditation.com/article/6-oprah_deepaks_21_day_meditation_experience There are some samples here: https://chopracentermeditation.com/landing/freestreams

Ongoing stress makes it all worst.

Hugs,

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Re: The Positives XXIII
#69: March 18, 2019, 01:57:40 PM
(((Hugs))) Sweet Serenity!

I like Mitz's suggestion a lot!!! Also I agree with Anjae on keeping your workouts light and airy😍

Just breath my friend!
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