Thought I would update my thread.
I'm fighting the no expectations rule. Not sure why it's so hard for me but it is. I have to keep healthy distance or I become his 'wife' again. He divorced me so he didn't want me as a wife so I have to remember boundaries. But I love him so much. How crazy is that?


Husband is having Christmas at his house. I was invited but I'm not going. The invite came thru our daughters not from him. He told them I was invited and they extended the invitation. Either way, I'm not going.
Went on a blind date. The guy was OK, but it's a no. However, he made me feel like a woman. Not a mom or middle age 55 year old has been.......but........a sexxy desirable woman. That felt so good and gave me a confidence boost.
I sometimes feel husband and I agree both watching each other to see who will make the first move toward THE CONVERSATION. He seems afraid and I'm stubborn. So nothing is happening. I'm not putting myself in harms way. Not sure I'm strong enough to be hurt again.
If this is a touch and go it's been a year long one. But I'm not sure if we're headed anywhere. Anyway, I'm rambling and going no where.