Author Topic: My Story Beauty into Beast 16  (Read 1617 times)

Offline Shelly7435

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My Story Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #10 on: October 29, 2019, 04:30:42 AM »
Attaching.
M 53
H 48
M 12 years; together 17 years
D18, S28
Summer 2014 - H wanted to runaway
9/14 I was diagnosed with Breast cancer
11/14 Surgery for BC..3 day after my father dies
11/14 BD 2 days after surgery. I have no passion for you.
2/15 moved out
Dated each other all year affection back on..
3/16 moved home
7/16 Diagnosed with Breast cancer again
8/16 No affection again. I knew something was wrong.
9/16 Another surgery for Breast Cancer
9/16 BD 11 days after surgery discovered -EA with much younger W from Work. That is over. I think he has meaningless flings. Work is his mistress
10/16 I filed for D (financial reasons)
10/16 I moved out.
10/16 Now off and on vanisher
5/17 Divorce final

Offline UrsaMajor

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #11 on: October 29, 2019, 04:37:06 AM »
She would most definetly make a good one for MLCers.

I can just see the first "client..."

And here's Mort!


Seriously though, being able to cut through the crap is very disconcerting for those who's lives are built on a foundation of lies.....

I think one of the easiest ways to start those kinds of conversations is to ask right up front if the person is coming to you for advice or not.
Me - 56
xW - 49
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation
S - 12
D - 8
2 Dogs (1 each)
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

Online Whyus

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #12 on: October 29, 2019, 07:30:10 AM »
  :o.. Ladies..... talk to us in a language that we understand and not in riddles!

Ha ha... oh Whyus.. you clearly don't know me at all do you.  ;D
lol, I wasnt really Talking to you directly morte. I know your a sharp shooter, i meant women in general  ;)
Married - 19,5 Years pre BD
Together - 21,5 Years
Me: 46
W: 46 (Acts 25)
BD 1: 10.01.2017
BD 2: 24.02.2017 OM 28 (now 31) Trainings partner. Is tolerated by LaFamiglia
2 Sons - 20 & 21
1 Dogs and a cat.
Own home . Sold!
Divorce Date 21.08.2018
T1  http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8671.0

Offline 9393roo

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #13 on: October 29, 2019, 08:18:42 AM »
Attaching.
Husband 54
Me 54
Kids 3 sons 28, 26, 23 1 daughter 19
BD #1 Spring 2016
BD #2 Winter 2017
married 32 years.  Together 34
H never moved out except 3 weeks after BD #1
OW 30 year single mom employee-He says EA only I don’t believe him.
He is working on things and far from being cooked.

Offline Savoir Faire

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #14 on: October 29, 2019, 06:04:25 PM »
Many of the LBS's here I would think are people who can empathize and see through other's cr@p.  It's one of the reasons we are still her, we can feel what the MLCer feels but call them out on behaviour.
"And when they ask you about me and you find yourself thinking back on all of our memories,
I hope you ache in regret as the truth hits you like a bullet and you find yourself replying: ""She loved me more than anyone else in the entire world and I tried to destroy her."  He failed by the way. 
http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=8412(Denjef's thread)

Offline beyondblessed

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #15 on: October 29, 2019, 06:39:51 PM »
Whyus.....I think you will find quite a few of us who speak our minds very clearly and concisely.   I do think that is one of the things my xh detested about me the most.  Oh well, can't please everyone 🤷‍♀️

Offline Dumbfounded

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #16 on: October 29, 2019, 07:22:49 PM »
I have absolutely no skill for keeping my mouth shut when I smell BS. I give lots of chances and make lots of excuses for people but when I am finally done with your BS you will know it.
Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

Offline MortesbrideTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #17 on: October 30, 2019, 02:04:52 AM »
You ever had one of those things that you can't get off your mind? It plays over and over like a broken firetrucking record...so you decide to distract yourself.

You get on an old Rock and roll playlist with some of the greatest rock out jams, you then decide to do some chores to distract yourself...8 hours later you have listened to a million songs, scrubbed the baseboards, and every cupboard in your house....yet the moment you stop it is back.

You run out of chores so you go upstairs and sit in the shower, and then decide maybe you should just go to bed early. Maybe if you got to sleep it will stop.

And then your stupid ass brain decides that since you ran around all day ignoring it...it will get you in your sleep. >:(

I mean....just asking for a friend.  ;)
You know this is MLC when you have played emotional hot potato with a pair of crotch-less tights.

Online Treasur

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #18 on: October 30, 2019, 02:11:51 AM »
Yup.
Tell your friend that it is normal when stuff is moving around in your mental attic  :)
And that the trick is to separate out the anxiety monkeys (noisy, messy, tiring bc they run around screeching and make you feel bad) from the God/universe post it notes or prods to get your attention which tend to feel a bit different.....
Ignore the content for a bit...how do you feel?
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.
Healing and growing found here https://littleplotbythesea.wordpress.com

"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

Offline MortesbrideTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: Beauty into Beast 16
« Reply #19 on: October 30, 2019, 02:55:54 AM »
Hmm honestly a little bit like the wind has got knocked out my sails.

This is the first time I have felt like this since getting back from Tuscany.

The same stupid ''knowing'' or whatever you call it that made me get out of my comfort zone to go there, pushed me to book up and plan these next two trips.

I was so pumped and full steam ahead, passionately planning and excited and whatever.... I knew the why's.

But the last few days it is like there are some holes in may sails... there is no wind... my boat is just sitting here drifting in the in between. Nothing but my thoughts to annoy me.

Of course my thoughts now torment me with all sorts of things. Hopes, dreams, fears, worries...''I told you so''s.

They are all present and fighting for attention so of course I do what anyone does and try to ignore them. ::)

I know it will pass, but damned if it doesn't suck while you are here.
You know this is MLC when you have played emotional hot potato with a pair of crotch-less tights.

 

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