Author Topic: My Story BURNING MAN 16  (Read 2590 times)

Online Treasur

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My Story Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #90 on: December 01, 2019, 04:18:53 AM »
Me too....there seem to be some connection problems over the last couple of days.

Watcher, what you describe about being 'allergic' to feeling controlled makes perfect sense. We have an extreme life experience with some particular flavours that costs us a lot, so it would be foolish actually if we didn't become more aware or sensitive to things that feel a bit similar. In my case, I am now much more allergic to deceit, cruelty or feeling ghosted. I suspect, with time, the trick is being able to separate the red flags from just the normal stuff of life and other human's habits so we don't over-react but honour our boundaries when we must.
T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
Divorced April 18. XH married ow 6 weeks later.
Healing and growing found here https://littleplotbythesea.wordpress.com

"Option A is not available so I need to kick the s**t out of Option B" Sheryl Sandberg

Offline Thunder

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #91 on: December 01, 2019, 05:05:21 AM »
Same here Acorn.  I try to reply and get a blank screen.
Hope they fix the problem soon.   :-\
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline WatcherTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #92 on: December 01, 2019, 06:09:42 AM »
That's how Coup's work ladies. They make you believe there are connection problems. The moderators always go first. Notice how UrsaMajor hasn't been around.  ???

Offline Thunder

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #93 on: December 01, 2019, 06:27:05 AM »
 ;D  Ohhh is that how it works?

Well it's been nice knowing you.......

Say did you hear anything about the appraisal?
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Offline WatcherTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #94 on: December 01, 2019, 07:28:44 AM »
LOL Thunder,

Now I'm having connection problems for speaking out about the attempted Coup and my affiliation with a moderator.  ???

I will probably hear something about the appraisal next week. Most likely if she hasn't complied. I did think the other day how her work phone number is pointless.

The appraiser needs to call her that day to let him in so her cell phone is more necessary. Hopefully, I found her correct number and she took care of business on Friday.  ::)

Yes Treasur I have noticed that I maybe super sensitive to certain behavior now and maybe sometimes I over react or take it too personal.

I was thinking about the crisis and I don't believe much really ever changed. I got hit with BD as she announced that she wanted a divorce in 2015.

Pretty much her stance never changed. There's been a tremendous amount of NC and she pops up occasionally just to check on my whereabouts I gather. She just wants to make sure I am where she left me.

If we had a legal separation option I would had gone that route immediately. The attorney in Oct 2015 told me there was no other option but divorce.

I think of all the crisis craziness and how it's still ongoing. Her need for constant attention both male and female. That never dissipitates.

So the simple solution for me was always to step to the side which seemed easier said then done. I know I'm more comfortable now getting out of her way.

In fairness, however, I did love the woman and we were together 26 years at BD. It's not so easy to make that transition to how I feel today about her.

I've noticed it's better I just don't think about her. I always see how these MLC H leave the home in most cases. They come back sniffing around at times and if there is going to be a reconnection it really falls on them.

IDK I was thrown out and our home will be sold so I don't see how either one of us is going to sniff out the other in the future.

As of today I wouldn't entertain a reconnection as I just don't see how that would even be possible. Ok enough crisis talk.

I skipped the 15K today because they called for bad weather and I didn't feel like running in cold plus rain. I was invited to workout so I went to Kickboxing instead.

I took off 10 days from Kickboxing for the marathon and I am soooooo out of shape now. So hopefully I will get back up to speed this week. I have 2 concerts this week and a half marathon next Sunday.

Hopefully I will be able to connect with S16 on Mon, Tues, and Fri this week.

I do see more people posting now Thunder so maybe the attempted Coup has been defeated. Hopefully.  ;D

Enjoy your day ladies
Thank you

« Last Edit: December 01, 2019, 07:35:05 AM by Watcher »

Offline Thunder

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #95 on: December 01, 2019, 07:31:55 PM »
coup: A sudden appropriation of leadership or power; a takeover: a boardroom coup.

Not too sure they are defeated yet, Watcher.  Stay vigilant.

I hope you get to see your son this week.   :)
A quote from a recovered MLCer: 
"From my experience if my H had let me go a long time ago, and stop pressuring me, begging, and pleading and just let go I possibly would have experienced my awakening sooner than I did."

Online UrsaMajor

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #96 on: December 02, 2019, 01:15:19 AM »
Careful Watcher...

Coup or no, they are watching YOU!



I just had better things to do this weekend... Birthdays to celebrate, dinners to cook, SOME Advent/Christmas stuff to get out of the cellar, etc.... You know... life...
Me - 56
xW - 49
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation
S - 12
D - 8
2 Dogs (1 each)
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

Offline WatcherTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #97 on: December 02, 2019, 05:50:06 AM »
Living your life with better things to do on the weekend UrsaMajor ! Well if that doesn't sound like your typical Hero Spouse re-indoctrination program ideology. Hmm....

Offline WatcherTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #98 on: December 02, 2019, 08:10:40 AM »
We have a snow storm en route for this afternoon so school will be a half day so I will try with S16 tomorrow. I haven't seen him since the 21st because he has been sick.  :-\

I heard from him last on the 26th.

Last week he had a half day on both Tues and Wed heading into Thanksgiving. He said his mom was picking him up both days.

I finally have online school access again as of last night since the new marking period began and , in actuality, he didn't attend school either day.

He knows I'm a stickler for attendance and he may believe that I'm paying the tuition so he wouldn't want to admit he was still being kept home. This year I really don't care as this is coming to an end soon.

So he missed 7 of 8 days hence my last seeing him on the 21st. He did attend school this morning, however the weather caused an early dismissal and I'm just too far away.

So we haven't seen each other since Luke Combs concert day so that's why I haven't been mentioning him. Hopefully tomorrow.

Basketball and Band will be starting at the end of the month. Then he will be on break again. The school breaks foul up our contact.

It's almost over. I'm confident it will work out.  ;D

Ok I will place my focus back on the Coup.


Offline WatcherTopic starterTopic starter

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Re: BURNING MAN 16
« Reply #99 on: December 02, 2019, 04:46:58 PM »
"The Toilet Paper" by a real life LBS.

Last Spring I brought my sons a 4 roll pack of toilet paper. MLCer was angry because I did not buy the 32 roll pack as ordered. Therefore she forbade our sons from using said toilet paper.

Give it 10 years and she will be romanticized for the heroic MLCer she has been to our children.

I don't need to see inside the MLCer mind. I've lived this nonsensical life going on 54 months now. I've seen plenty.

So my attorney called tonight and the call failed to go through for whatever reason and now I will have to sleep on it and wait for the morning.

So its Monday after the Black Friday home appraisal deadline. Hmm, 200 dollar fee plus Black Friday. Do we think she paid it and allowed the appraiser inside ?

Hopefully he calls back tomorrow morning and fills me in. This was not even on my radar until the failed call tonight as the next order of business for me is the Jan 14th hearing. So we will see.

 

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