Skip to main content

Author Topic: My Story My third thread: Still living in interesting times

T
  • ***
  • Full Member
  • Posts: 185
  • Gender: Male
My Story My third thread: Still living in interesting times
OP: January 23, 2020, 01:49:04 PM
Almost 18 months after starting my second thread, I now start on my third. 

Link to my old thread here (I hope)

https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=10305.msg680353#msg680353

Tonight I went round to pick up the girls, and W asked me to rub her back as she had a muscle all knotted up.  She’d asked the girls but they didn’t have enough muscle.  All very weird, stood there in the hallway rubbing her back lol.  Anyway, I think I need to go and provide a link to this thread on my second thread. 
  • Logged
“It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul”.

  • *
  • Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 10371
  • Gender: Male
  • You can't please everyone. You are NOT a pizza!
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#1: January 24, 2020, 03:07:44 AM
Perfect - all correctly linked!

And following along... 18 months for one thread?  :o

As far as the back rub goes, I guess that means that you don't have Cooties or some other communicable disease anymore? <snort>
  • Logged
« Last Edit: January 24, 2020, 03:08:46 AM by UrsaMajor »
Me - 57, xW - 50
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 13, D - 9
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

Survival Instructions for Newbies
Site Map
 
A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

H
  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 2432
  • Gender: Male
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#2: January 24, 2020, 03:24:56 AM
Moon
Weird it is my friend.  As UM said the cooties stage may be easing off.
I had a good laugh (to myself of course) my W was trying to scratch her back. You knkw the spot right under the shoulder blades we can't reach, lol. But after about 5 minutes of her flailing around trying reach it, I just calmly ask? Do you want me to scratch your back?
She said yes, can you please do it!!!!! That was always just a simple thing laying in bed. She would ask, can you scratch my back?? Now??? Well it must be huge.
  • Logged

  • *
  • Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 10371
  • Gender: Male
  • You can't please everyone. You are NOT a pizza!
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#3: January 24, 2020, 03:57:26 AM
Moon
Weird it is my friend.  As UM said the cooties stage may be easing off.
I had a good laugh (to myself of course) my W was trying to scratch her back. You knkw the spot right under the shoulder blades we can't reach, lol. But after about 5 minutes of her flailing around trying reach it, I just calmly ask? Do you want me to scratch your back?
She said yes, can you please do it!!!!! That was always just a simple thing laying in bed. She would ask, can you scratch my back?? Now??? Well it must be huge.

That's because you have COOTIES!

  • Logged
Me - 57, xW - 50
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 13, D - 9
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

Survival Instructions for Newbies
Site Map
 
A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

H
  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 2432
  • Gender: Male
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#4: January 24, 2020, 04:22:12 AM
UM
I'll take the uncomfortable cootie stage over the stage where ????? Well best way I can explain it is when little dog gets close to the cat and all her hair sticks straight out from head to tail like a puffer fish cat, lol. I'm happy that's gone.
  • Logged

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 1189
  • Gender: Female
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#5: January 24, 2020, 04:06:17 PM
Moon

Following along!

Thanks for the link on your last thread. Quite interesting!

Rose 🌹
  • Logged
Married 15+ years with 2 children
BD1 - 2016
BD2 - 2017
BD3 - Sept 2019
MOW Mar 2016-Jan 2018
OW2 - Feb 2019, age 30
H left home Oct 2017 to stay with his parents
Bought a family Puppy mid 2018 - referred to as ‘P’

Link to advice by my mentor, Phoenix, on what to tell the children about H leaving - reply #33 (it had a glitch)
https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9313.30

T
  • ***
  • Full Member
  • Posts: 185
  • Gender: Male
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#6: February 10, 2020, 02:48:34 PM
Thanks all
I know, I know - 18 months for one thread.  I need to post more often.  Sometimes it’s just finding the time.  I’m trying to keep busy. 

Nothing much more to report.  Things seem civil, but W seems to have stopped asking me to join them when she has the girls.  That doesn’t stop her asking to join us though.  D6 has had to have glasses.  It my was weekend when she went to pick them up, and W asked if she could come, as she wanted to be there.  Fine, but I had to bite my lip as this was only a couple of days after asking if I minded if the week we agreed she could have the girls to take them on holiday was pushed back a little, which would have covered my birthday.  I said I would mind, and she’s gone quiet about it since. 

The other day though, W rings in the evening.  She’s upset.  She’s just spoken to her dad, and it sounds like the prostate cancer he’s got has spread.  W says, very emotionally,  “Please promise me you’ll get yourself checked”.   I’m not sure what to say.  I have no symptoms (I checked online what they were) and, as I said to W, it wasn’t that long since I had my blood tested (my optician was worried I had high blood pressure- can’t think what would have caused that).   Still, a touching if odd moment. 

As I say though, things have been civil but she’s still out drinking and partying when she gets the chance.  Even D6 said to me the other day, “Mummy’s out boozing again”. 

Anyway, 2 years on Friday since W announced she decided we had to separate.  I’ve the girls with me for the weekend and we’re going round to a friends house for some tea, so hopefully that will keep my mind off things. 

Hope you’re all keeping well (and for those in the UK, surviving the weather).
Moon
  • Logged
“It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul”.

  • *****
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 1189
  • Gender: Female
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#7: February 10, 2020, 04:42:05 PM
Moon

Was it Valentine’s Day your BD?

They do pick their moments don’t they

Rose 🌹
  • Logged
Married 15+ years with 2 children
BD1 - 2016
BD2 - 2017
BD3 - Sept 2019
MOW Mar 2016-Jan 2018
OW2 - Feb 2019, age 30
H left home Oct 2017 to stay with his parents
Bought a family Puppy mid 2018 - referred to as ‘P’

Link to advice by my mentor, Phoenix, on what to tell the children about H leaving - reply #33 (it had a glitch)
https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=9313.30

T
  • ***
  • Full Member
  • Posts: 185
  • Gender: Male
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#8: February 11, 2020, 12:51:46 AM
Hi Rose
Yes, that’s right.  BD1 was on 14th Jan (ILYBINILWY, etc) then BD2 exactly a month later on Valentines Day, (‘I want us to separate’). 

They do.  Looking back now, I cant believe how calmly I took it.  Perhaps I was still in shock.  Part of me regrets not absolutely blowing my top at her.  It might not have helped but at least I would have got it off my chest. 
Moon

  • Logged
“It matters not how strait the gate,
How charged with punishments the scroll,
I am the master of my fate,
I am the captain of my soul”.

  • *
  • Moderator
  • Hero Member
  • Posts: 10371
  • Gender: Male
  • You can't please everyone. You are NOT a pizza!
Re: My third thread: Still living in interesting times
#9: February 11, 2020, 01:54:10 AM
Moon,

My Atomic "I want a divorce" BD was 3rd Advent so "Merry Bah-Freaking-Humbug Christmas"

Yep, they sure can pick the dates....
  • Logged
Me - 57, xW - 50
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 13, D - 9
2 Dogs
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019

Survival Instructions for Newbies
Site Map
 
A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.

 

Legal Disclaimer

The information contained within The Hero's Spouse website family (www.midlifecrisismarriageadvocate.com, http://theherosspouse.com and associated subdomains), (collectively 'website') is provided as general information and is not intended to be a substitute for professional legal, medical or mental health advice or treatment for specific medical conditions. The Hero's Spouse cannot be held responsible for the use of the information provided. The Hero's Spouse recommends that you consult a trained medical or mental health professional before making any decision regarding treatment of yourself or others. The Hero's Spouse recommends that you consult a legal professional for specific legal advice.

Any information, stories, examples, articles, or testimonials on this website do not constitute a guarantee, or prediction regarding the outcome of an individual situation. Reading and/or posting at this website does not constitute a professional relationship between you and the website author, volunteer moderators or mentors or other community members. The moderators and mentors are peer-volunteers, and not functioning in a professional capacity and are therefore offering support and advice based solely upon their own experience and not upon legal, medical, or mental health training.