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Author Topic: My Story My wife's MLC part 2

J
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My Story My wife's MLC part 2
#60: June 21, 2021, 04:41:02 AM
Thank you off-road for your words
Im working on me and seeing some pleasing results of my own progress , I'm taking her contact as it comes and trying to see it for what it is as keeping communication open .
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J
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My wife's MLC part 2
#61: July 22, 2021, 05:13:45 AM
Contact has dropped virtually nothing from her , im not contacting her im feeling a little detached
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My wife's MLC part 2
#62: August 03, 2021, 03:01:31 PM
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Im working on me and seeing some pleasing results of my own progress
Just catching up. I would like to hear more about your own progress. Do you have a new hobby, fitness routine or something? Or just getting back to feeling like yourself?
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"I'm slowly learning to expect nothing and appreciate everything."

Together 28 years, married 27. Two adult kids, ours

BD #1: 2016 - EA  |  BD #2: 2018 - FA

W moved out - June 2019 | OM#3 - July 2019
W asks for divorce - August 2019 | Divorce final - September 2019 | Moving on

My thread: https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=11537.new#new

New Here? Read this! http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=1149.0
J
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My wife's MLC part 2
#63: August 06, 2021, 04:36:51 AM
Im working on parts of my character to let more things go and not get stressed so easily,( I'm not some Tasmanian devil 😊)  I've sat back and watched what sets people's anger off . Im only involving myself with things I can control and letting uncontrollable stuff go .

Im still trying to hit a golf ball (straight is the aim) . I've been going to the gym and have gained some new muscles and fitness levels.
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My wife's MLC part 2
#64: August 06, 2021, 12:01:09 PM
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Im working on parts of my character to let more things go and not get stressed so easily,( I'm not some Tasmanian devil 😊)  I've sat back and watched what sets people's anger off . Im only involving myself with things I can control and letting uncontrollable stuff go .

Im still trying to hit a golf ball (straight is the aim) . I've been going to the gym and have gained some new muscles and fitness levels.
Great! Keep up the good work!
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"I'm slowly learning to expect nothing and appreciate everything."

Together 28 years, married 27. Two adult kids, ours

BD #1: 2016 - EA  |  BD #2: 2018 - FA

W moved out - June 2019 | OM#3 - July 2019
W asks for divorce - August 2019 | Divorce final - September 2019 | Moving on

My thread: https://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=11537.new#new

New Here? Read this! http://mlcforum.theherosspouse.com/index.php?topic=1149.0
J
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My wife's MLC part 2
#65: August 14, 2021, 07:30:15 AM
The support and encouragement I've received from you all is an immense help
Thank you all
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M
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My wife's MLC part 2
#66: August 14, 2021, 08:32:28 AM
JT-  Sounds like there is GOOD focus on YOU is happening. That has recently been a life saver for me. Reading, learning, fitness!! Nothing better than using this time to become the best version of YOU
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There is almost something harder about someone being alive and having to lose what you believed to be true of them than someone actually dying.

Indefatigability - determined to do or achieve something; firmness of purpose
perspicacity- a clarity of vision or intellect which provides a deep understanding and insight

Married July 1991
Jan 2018 BD1 moved out I filed for Div/ H stopped it
Oct 2018 moved back
Oct 2020 BD2
Feb 2021 Div-29 1/2 years
July 2021 Married OW
Feb 2022  XH fired
June 2022 XH bring OW to meet family due to xMIL illness
May 2023 went NC after telling XH we could not be friends
Aug 2023 XH moves w/o OWife
May 2024 xMIL visits XH/OW in their new home
Aug 2024 cut relations w/XH fam.
Dec 2024 D33 expecting baby ( XH not told)
J
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My wife's MLC part 2
#67: August 15, 2021, 02:05:14 PM
I'm gently and progressively changing to become that better person .
My detachment comes in cycles of sadness with has happened but accepting it's her issues not mine and to let go and herself.
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J
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My wife's MLC part 2
#68: September 06, 2021, 04:00:15 AM
Hello again
I've been rereading my comments from everyone ,as I've now got more emotional strength and re examine my role in the separation,  some of the comments and advice made make more sense to me as I can see this with a clearer view .

The main thing is to detach and leave alone with her thoughts and feelings. I can accept I've unwittingly been a factor in her MLC, I've read and absorbed a huge amount of information to better help me cope with this life event . She mentioned her moped not starting again due to a lack of use , I resisted the urge to offer my help which is an alien concept for me not to help . A neighbour was dropping hints about needing help with things and again I stepped away from his problems.
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5
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My wife's MLC part 2
#69: September 06, 2021, 04:28:41 AM
Hey JT,
You are so right in that the comments are there when we are ready. IMHO we must know enough about MLC and be in the right place within ourselves to fully value the comments and wisdom provided.  I too spend a lot of time going back over my comments from the beginning until now.  Funny thing is i have the aha moments now instead of earlier when the comments were just words.

It sounds like you are moving forward and are finding your internal strength that was always there.  Wishing you the very best on your Journey.

5hil
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« Last Edit: September 06, 2021, 04:29:50 AM by 5hilmerton »
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