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Author Topic: My Story BRAND NEW MAN 11

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My Story BRAND NEW MAN 11
#70: April 07, 2021, 10:48:46 AM
In my youth, I took a car load of friends to NYC to see the opera.  After some serious trial by fire, I declared "oh, I see, they just expect you to go " and I abandoned the niceties and the blinker and the driving went much better after that.  Although the reminder of the ride was terrifying for my passengers.

I take the train in to NYC now.     
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Married 1998
MLC H 48
LBS W 47
D16, S12
BD March, 2016
Left home Sept 4, 2016 - living with parents
H filed for D - July 24, 2017
D final March 14, 2018 - still living at parent's house

“You've seen my descent, now watch my rising.”
― Jalaluddin Rumi

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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#71: April 09, 2021, 12:17:54 PM
Hi Dumbfounded, Thunder, Treasur.

Ooh I received wonderful news come May 7th at 10am, tickets for Eric Church, Gather Again Tour, go on sale.  ;D If you join the fan club that will get one to pre sale.

Listen up LBS, a decade from now when your MLCer may exit the tunnel what are you going to say when they ask what have you been doing with your life. Tell them, you went to see Eric Church and that will haunt them for the rest of their days. Might as well get tickets for 2 concerts like I did with Luke Combs and really pile it on. ;)

Now we need Jason Aldean to announce his tour dates to complete the trifecta of piling it on.

Oh yes, I learned quite early on to stop using my blinker in NYC while driving because it is seen as a sign of weakness. Cutting people off is respected much more. Nothing screams, "your not from around here" like a car utilizing its blinker.

The train going into NYC is great as I did that with the Brett Young concert. Leaving NYC is not pleasurable by train. The concourse is always crowded and they never announce which track the train is arriving on until the last minute. Then there is a bum rush to squeeze through the appropriate access door that leads to the correct platform, lol.

I had an issue with my ankle yesterday so I'm taking a few days off. Well I did goto Kickboxing last night so now I'm taking a few days off. Kickboxing is most likely the culprit and since running is my #1 focal point, I will rest it now before I have to start running on April 25th.

A lot of gray and rain in the forecast this weekend so we will see what happens. Tomorrow will probably be hiking and Sunday S18 will learn to drive in the rain again. Talk about trying someone's patience. Its either 20 degrees or raining, lol.

Enjoy your day everyone

Thank you ladies
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#72: April 11, 2021, 05:55:14 AM
Yesterday was an overcast day so we hiked The Giant Stairs which has a difficult rating. I didn't think S18 was ready for this one so I went back and forth in my head as I drove.

The 1,489 foot descent down from the Palisades cliffs has a typical dirt path in a wooded area with stone stairs in sections. There is a stream that leads to the Peanut Leap Waterfall which looked pretty decent yesterday. It took us 55 minutes to get to the shoreline along the Hudson River and the waterfall from the parking lot.

It was not crowded at all yesterday so that was a bonus. So we continued along the shoreline on a rocky path for another half mile before we reached The Giant Stairs.

I had S18 pose for a photo with the warning/danger/ your mom would kill your dad if she knew what you were doing sign posted at the entrance. The sign said it would take 2 hours to traverse the 1 mile climb. So The Giant Stairs is a collapsed cliff and hikers are climbing over the rubble.

I led the way as we took our time as I really couldn't have him falling off a ledge. There were a couple of spots where one has to really hug the boulders. He did have to reach out for my arm on occasion but we made it through the debris field without him losing his cell phone. We did come across someone who did drop their phone and they were trying to get it out from a hole. So S18 hiked with one hand glued to his pocket from that point onwards.

Oh I was so relieved when we cleared the debris field unscathed. We continued along the shore line until we had to make our 1,493 foot ascent. I had forgotten that was the part I did not like from my first hike. Yea the climb up was rough and we were finally back on top of the cliffs at 3 hours and 26 minutes.

We went to lunch afterwards and he slept on the drive home. He made the mistake of wearing pants yesterday so he was drenched eventhough the temps were about 65 degrees. He told my sister he was exhausted and confided in me that he was only scared in a few spots.

He bounced back quickly by dinner time. They do marvel on how much he eats. My brother and SIL are always there on Saturday visiting.

My mom was upset with the hike of course because it sounded dangerous. She said my older sister asked if I could take my nephew hiking with us next time. Now my initial thought to myself was why can't his father take him and IDK if I want to share my time with S18 even more than I already do with my family.

So hopefully the teenager sleeps late today. I mean he has to be worn down today but I think they bounce back more quickly. Like when we stopped for lunch after the hike I felt every ache in my body as I exited the car. S18 says he didn't feel anything, lol.

Today its supposed to rain and we are scheduled to go driving so I guess its his turn to place me in danger.

Enjoy your day everyone
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#73: April 11, 2021, 01:19:15 PM
That sounds like a great hike Watcher.  I can understand not wanting to share your time with your son, but perhaps nephew can come along once in a while, just not every time.

Hopefully the driving went well today.
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#74: April 11, 2021, 06:44:23 PM
Hi FaithWalker,

It rained today but we still went driving. I broke him out of the parking lot and we went to a state park where he logged another 1.5 hours bringing him to 5 hours now behind the wheel.

There wasn't much vehicular traffic because of the rain and it gave S18 an opportunity to read roadway signs and practice in a realistic environment instead of doing circles in a parking lot like we did during his first 2 attempts.

Overall he did fine and I was less nervous. He is still too close to the curbside and I fear for my tires. Today he had the car up to 43 mph and I was like, what are you doing. He pointed out we were in a 45 mph zone and I replied, I do not care what that sign says. Drop your speed, lol.

He got hungry and I think his driving toleration is 1.5 hours so we went to lunch. Sunday is a short day. Then we went back to my mom's for dinner before I returned him home. We had to wait for the dysfunction train to arrive.

We said our good bye and will see each other on Tuesday night for dinner. Our next hike will be at the beach which traverses through a forest and is relatively flat.

S18 drove down what turned out to be a dead end today and we discovered a WW2 era machine gun nest so now we have to get out and hike it as the park does have a legitimate 3.5 mile flat sandy hike.

Well I'm very protective of my GAL. My family are always interested in my activities. As the forum knows it took my 2.5 years to find activities. Yea they all think I'm living the high life because I travel the entire state.

My nephew would have to do a flat hike. I would never have taken him to the Giant Stairs, lol. I was really flying under the radar until S18 showed up. Now my family are always asking questions as to where we have been.

So we will see how Tuesday night goes as I'm going to bed.

Have a good night

Thank you
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Re: BRAND NEW MAN 11
#75: April 12, 2021, 03:40:12 PM
Watcher, just to say I'm still following your journey. So much positive stuff this year that it's almost unbelievable. Love to hear about your hikes and driving adventures with S18. Well done for lasting 1.5 hours doing the driving lessons, I was never able to last more than 10 minutes.

Nice to see you back in your running gear. Very colourful stuff!
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Married 1989, together since 1984 
BD May 2014,
D26, D23, S16
OW Physical Affair same one. He and she said she turned 34 the month of BD. She turned 52 this year.

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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#76: April 13, 2021, 07:23:26 AM
Hi Milly.

Just Journaling

So we will not be having dinner tonight. S18 texted me yesterday afternoon from an airport as his mother has them all now in Florida. IDK if this is a vacation or a fleeing situation since she sprung it to him last minute. He doesn't know himself.

I have repeatedly warned him not to get on a plane with her so maybe this will serve as a life lesson for him if she does not return him. S18 attends school online and his mom works from home, hence the reason behind one of her new phones, so it could be an extended stay.

On a positive side there really is no space for family to house them so xW would have to have her own apartment. She most likely received $4200 in stimulus money for the pandemic that just keeps on giving to some.

She went on vacation over Thanksgiving to Florida also with stimulus money while sicking her attorney on me to pay high school tuition.

As I dropped S18 off on Sunday night I saw S20 and was thinking to myself how I need to get S18 away from him. That will be his future if he stays with both S20 and his mom. He will be 21 in a month with no job, no college, and no future. His mother's constant companion. Meanwhile he is probably close to weighing 300lbs which is clearly unhealthy for him.

So there is nothing for me to do but just monitor the situation. This is why the house will be sold before I put money out on anything. I need to free myself first and I will not enable this situation any further with high school graduation nonsense and college beforehand. The complete eradication of this horrendous individual from my life will absolutely come first. I will not bend on my quest for complete freedom.

I will not overcompensate because my son's choose to live with their deadbeat disordered mother. Today the water at the house is scheduled to be turned off.

So be careful what you wish for when wanting them so badly to come back. Mine can stay away for life. I don't have pleasant thoughts of her anymore and really wish karma would bite her, however, I think some people just getaway with it.

Enjoy your day everyone
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#77: April 13, 2021, 07:33:47 AM
Just a thought or two....

#1 - who is taking care of the dog and where?
#2 - if there is no one in the house, can you get the sale process underway? She has left the premises with no information so, based on her history, one could validly expect her to have done a runner with no intention of returning in the near future.

She has also, in fact, violated the visitation order unless I miss my guess.... I figure that you probably don't have a key to get in though, right?

UM
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Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
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BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
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Divorce final 30 August 2019

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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#78: April 13, 2021, 09:59:31 AM
I'm very very sorry, Watcher. I hope your son stays in touch and lets you know what is going on.
I'm guessing that as your son is now 18, your legal ground is less solid?
What does your L say about sons and house etc?
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T: 18  M: 12 (at BD) No kids.
H diagnosed with severe depression Oct 15. BD May 16. OW since April 16, maybe earlier. Silent vanisher mostly.
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BRAND NEW MAN 11
#79: April 13, 2021, 12:39:03 PM
Hi UrsaMajor, Treasur.

Well xW just left me a text message. The boys will be on vacation for 2 weeks and S18 will contact me when they are done. She figured I needed a break. Period. She is just covering herself.

Well unfortunately for S18 I will not be resuming the parenting schedule when he returns. I will not be a pawn in her game any further nor will I continually have the 2 boys yanked in and out from my life. She can have them. 
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