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Author Topic: My Story Wish You Well

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My Story Wish You Well
#150: October 06, 2024, 08:42:14 PM
I really feel like I needed to come here and post. But I’m not sure exactly what I wanted/needed to say (get out! Haha). I will therefore just ramble.  :P

On Saturday night I went to my xH’s nephew’s housewarming party (because he’s MY nephew too and I am always always invited to all  in-law family functions, yes it is weird I know). M and SS12 came with me. XH and stoopid OW were there as well.

What is incredibly weird and shocking to me these days is that I simultaneously a) don’t care at all that they’re there, and b) still find it so freaking WEIRD that my HUSBAND is there with some other woman… and I am there with some other man.

We have children together. He likes and comments on all my FB posts about ‘our girls’ (I always write ‘my girls’, he always writes ‘our girls’). We still have family health insurance. He still has all his stuff in my shed. He has MY NAME tattooed on his arm! We are still so connected. But at the same time, SO disconnected.  :o

We have all these underground/invisible bonds/connections. But we go to these parties with other people and we are only as publicly polite to each other as we need to be. There is no animosity. But also no public intimacy. As though we only vaguely know each other. Guests at the party that didn’t know our history wouldn’t have a clue that we even KNEW each, let alone that we were married for 20 years. It is all so CRAAAZZZYYY!!!   :o ;) ;D

Don’t get me wrong. I’m fine with it how it is these days. I worked hard to get here. I really think I’m on a fabulous path (M is still awesome and we are going from strength to strength, I have no flags waving there). 

I guess what I will never be able to fathom is how xH can act like everything is fine and he has no regrets, doesn’t ever miss our life (when I still do so much), and that WE are just… ‘the past’ now, oh well, too bad, so sad. 

But I remind myself that I also wear that public ‘he’s just someone I used to know’ mask. It’s therefore quite possible (and knowing him I’d bet probable) that he also wears that mask and feels how f’ing WEIRD it is. Crazy crazy crazy!!   ;D ;D ;D

I am just so bloody GRATEFUL that I am good now. That it doesn’t spin me out anymore. If we have to continue like this, I am ok with that. I will put yesterday to bed. Because yesterday’s gone (that strikes me as a good name for a new thread…).  :'( 8)
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M: 54 (48 @ BD), H: 56 (51 @ BD); Married 20yrs, together 23yrs
D: 25 (19 @ BD), D: 23 (17 @ BD), 'Extra D': 23 (17 @ BD)
BD (that I didn't recognise as such) Easter 2018
BD 9th Sep 2018
OW - he (supposedly) met her in the pub a week before BD, told me about her a week after BD. Thinks 'their planets have collided' because 'their eyes met across the room' and they had an 'instant connection'. Lives with her. Is building a life with her.
Jun 20: H plans to buy a block of land and build a house with her (never happens).
May 22: Movement... (likely T&G? Time will tell I guess)
May 23: Yep, definitely a T&G last year. Still have contact but very minimal. He is a long way away from me these days. He doesn't seem particularly happy in his new life... but he's still there soooo....
Jun 23: I meet a lovely new man (M).
Jun 24: xH and OW finally buy a block of land
Jul 24: xH proposes to OW... in front of the whole family, just wow...
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Wish You Well
#151: October 07, 2024, 05:59:52 AM
Quote from: Evermore on October 06, 2024, 08:42:14 PM
I am just so bloody GRATEFUL that I am good now. That it doesn’t spin me out anymore. If we have to continue like this, I am ok with that. I will put yesterday to bed. Because yesterday’s gone (that strikes me as a good name for a new thread…).  :'( 8)

Which is good..... because you need one now....



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Me - 61, xW - 54
Together 19 years - Married 17 at separation & 21 at D-Day
S - 17, D - 13
1 Dog
BD#1 - August 2015
Atomic BD - 13 Dec 2015
House sold & separated - Mar 2016
Divorce final 30 August 2019
Moved on in life
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A "friend" will not "stand by you" no matter what you do. That is NOT a friend. That is an enabler. That is an accomplice.
A REAL friend will sit you down and tell you to your face to stop being a firetrucking idiot before you ruin your life and the lives of those around you.
E
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Wish You Well
#152: October 07, 2024, 09:11:24 PM
  • Logged
M: 54 (48 @ BD), H: 56 (51 @ BD); Married 20yrs, together 23yrs
D: 25 (19 @ BD), D: 23 (17 @ BD), 'Extra D': 23 (17 @ BD)
BD (that I didn't recognise as such) Easter 2018
BD 9th Sep 2018
OW - he (supposedly) met her in the pub a week before BD, told me about her a week after BD. Thinks 'their planets have collided' because 'their eyes met across the room' and they had an 'instant connection'. Lives with her. Is building a life with her.
Jun 20: H plans to buy a block of land and build a house with her (never happens).
May 22: Movement... (likely T&G? Time will tell I guess)
May 23: Yep, definitely a T&G last year. Still have contact but very minimal. He is a long way away from me these days. He doesn't seem particularly happy in his new life... but he's still there soooo....
Jun 23: I meet a lovely new man (M).
Jun 24: xH and OW finally buy a block of land
Jul 24: xH proposes to OW... in front of the whole family, just wow...
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