[Baxter1]

From what I see in here I can’t really disagree. whatever she does with the ‘space’ is up to her I would imagine. I’m going to use my ‘space’ to travel and hang out with friends new and old.

[Baxter1]

Journaling:

Baxter and I are getting settled in the new place and it’s not the worst thing. We’re getting into a routine and setting up the place my way. W asked if I needed help setting  up and I told her this is something I have to do for myself.

I’ve never really lived alone so having a place to ‘make my own’ is fun in a way. I’m really enjoying the growth opportunities from this. The awkwardness of seeing each other every day is gone and it’s helping with detachment.

I’m setting it up so I see the boys at least once a week and go out for dinner, or an activity. They can always come over and see Baxter and I so I’m looking forward to their visits. We’ll see how the contact with W is in the coming months. She can set the pace as to contact, it will interesting to see how this next phase goes.

[Reinventing]

You sound good, almost like you have some relief from it all being right in your face before.

Good idea on setting it up all on your own so it feels like your home after living at a house that was a strained home environment.

Yes, free yourself from trying to impact contact with her. That would be draining.

I think your sons are going to enjoy a more relaxed dad and quality time with you.

[UrsaMajor]

I remember that phase too but I didn't get any "help" offered (good for you to say "Thanks but no thanks"). I made my apartment mine. MLCxW2 did come over (before the D) for Christmas then and was quite sad as she noted that I had made my apartment quite comfortable for me, each kid had their own bedroom outfitted and I was growing forward with my life while she was wallowing along in her pit of self-made misery.

I too had never had a "place of my own" before so it was an experience to discover exactly what "my" style was.....