[HeavenlyFocus]

Help,

My D was finalized in early 22 and I was let go of my job the next day.  It was a very difficult time but it also gave me time to heal. I was able to find another job and eventually find a better job that I now really enjoy.  Hope your time gardening is giving you time to rest and heal.

As for getting acknowledgment about being treated badly, my focus was on my life and making sure I was thriving and taking care of my kids. My XW has struggled and it’s very clear that I have moved forward well in life.  I don’t need the acknowledgement from her. Life has a way of revealing the truth.

Take care of yourself and I wish you the best.

HF

[MomOfSteel]

I hope you are able to use the six months to reset and launch in a new direction where the job is more fulfilling than the last.  I don’t know why, but with the whole MLC mess it sometimes just feels like the hits keep coming.  It’s exhausting to be constantly trying to hold everything together.  I hope the job search is coming along.  Hugs. 

[OffRoad]

All I have to offer is try acceptance. This is your reality. Maybe it stinks right now, but accept this is what life has given you. Everyone here sees you, hears you, knows your pain and that it is completely unfair. Knowing all this, you take care of you and the children. You feel bad when you feel bad, and take all the little wins as the positives they are, even if it's just getting out of bed when you don't want to. Healing is not linear.

While on garden leave, try something new. Get out and about if you can, even if it's just taking yourself to lunch.

Search for new opportunities, even though you cannot apply for/accept them just yet. Know what is out there and what you might like. Should the perfect job arise,  you might request an early release (depends on the situation).

Play games with your kids. Indoor and outdoor.  Rearrange your space. Find a new hobby.  Build bird houses and give them away. Go Geocaching. Do something and celebrate the win.

Once you accept "this is what I have, what do I do with it?" slowly, slowly you will heal more. It's easy running on automaton mode (get up, go to work, pick up kids/dinner/dry cleaning, come home eat dinner, watch TV, go to sleep rinse and repeat). It's hard running on "Who moved my cheese?" mode. Accept that and roll with it, good or bad.

We get it. You get it. At some point you will also know you GOT this. It just takes time.

[Helpnewc]

Thank you Off-road.

I am 2 months into the garden and starting to do a little better. It is just so much time. Everyone else is so confident I will do well and yet you do not feel it yourself.

It is such a difficult way to live. My children have gone for 10 days now and they are scared of their mum so I don’t really hear from them. I am continuing to heal. The damage is so significant.


Acceptance is the main thing. This is how my life is now. It is not a way I wanted to live but I will push through.