[Dontgiveup]

How would someone know if a person in Africa was going through it?  I also don't think it happens there, but how would we ever know?  I remember OP telling me about a fellow LBSer from Egypt whose W was MLC.  Funny thing is that D is illegal there and one or both of them could be killed for it.  Kind of adds a different twist to "Eat, Pray Love" doesn't it?  What if this happened in the ancient times?  MLCers would be fed to lions or burned at the stake as witches (makes you wonder, huh?). 

From RCR's MLC Overview article
Since midlife crisis seems to be isolated to technologically advanced Western cultures lacking in ritual rites of passage, ageism is often blamed, but it is also not a cause of midlife crisis; rather it is an incubator, providing ideal cultural conditions.

I was thinking today about how much impact 9/11 had on our generation and whether or not unresolved existential issues stemming from that might have alot to do with what our spouses are going through.  I think we all felt vulnerable and mortal on that day, and the subsequent mass hysteria brought upon my the media sure as heck didn't help us to calm down and realize life would be okay.  Just a random thought, but I do suspect there being some sort of link between 9/11 and the high number of MLCers now.

I think MLC is directly linked to unresolved issues from an earlier age.  Events like 9/11 certainly led to trauma, but I am not sure events like that lead to MLC.

[Trustandlove]

I think it is very possible that events such as 9/11 (for those not directly affected....) can have an effect similar to a more personal bereavement, and thus can act as a trigger.  I know that I, elsewhere in the world, did feel that the world had irrevocably changed then, and that can trigger thoughts of one's own mortality, what is left to accomplish, is one on the right path, etc. 

I'm not saying that it leads directly to an MLC, but together with whatever else is going on it can certainly push in that direction.  So if there are unresolved issues from an earlier age a huge event such as that can push it, in much the same was that the death of someone close, for example, can be the final straw. 

[BonBon]

According to some of those "experts" that I've read, there is relatively little evidence of MLC in Eastern cultures, specifically those that honor their aged. 

I've had my head handed to me for saying these things in times past but I believe MLC IS a problem in the western world because we are more focused on youth, beauty, and "success", whatever that may mean.  I also believe it is because we are spoiled, in need of very little, and generally not having to look for our next meal and so forth.

I don't believe that is the whole story though...I combine that with FOO issues, possible hormonal issues, and a few other things which make up the perfect storm that becomes the MLC.  My H has repeatedly told me he would not have had an MLC were he in a place that finding food or avoiding slaugher took up all of his waking moments.  That's coming right from the horses mouth...so why shouldn't I believe it? 

I'm not in any way indicting the Western World.  I would not live anywhere that was not so politically/technically/socially advanced...not for a minute.  But in having it so good, in general, doesn't it stand to reason we might take that for granted and not appreciate things?  We throw away everything.  We worship the superficial.  Isn't that lack of appreciation one of the hallmarks of MLC?

Bon

[stayed]

Well BonBon, I won't hand you your head on a platter, in fact my h and I have had the exact same discussion.  For example how many people in Africa put their fingers down their throats to make themselves barf, so they can enjoy the "taste" of the food but not have to digest it and then get fat.  Tell me, how selfish is that in a world where half the people are scraping and scavenging for a few grains of rice? 

I don't find it hard to believe in the slightest that a bunch of spoiled, pampered, ninnies, who would prefer to sit around feeling miserable then go out and perhaps help some needy people or rescue an animal, or heck go fly a kite with some little boy or girl who doesn't have parents.  Oh that would be too easy I guess!

Hugs... Stayed

[BonBon]

Thankyou Stayed...I am going to avoid "ninny-dom" from here on in!  LOL!
But you are right in all you said...I didn't even think of some of those other maladies such as anorexia and so on.  Good point.  Certainly, when you're sole purpose is survival, literally, life would be very different indeed.

Hugs,
Bon

[Dontgiveup]

My H has repeatedly told me he would not have had an MLC were he in a place that finding food or avoiding slaugher took up all of his waking moments.  That's coming right from the horses mouth...so why shouldn't I believe it?

From RCR's article What is A Midlife Crisis?
I find self-reporting to be possibly the least reliable source--since MLCers deny they are having an MLC, during the crisis and may deny their past experience once the crisis is complete.

[stayed]

My H has repeatedly told me he would not have had an MLC were he in a place that finding food or avoiding slaugher took up all of his waking moments.  That's coming right from the horses mouth...so why shouldn't I believe it?

From RCR's article What is A Midlife Crisis?
I find self-reporting to be possibly the least reliable source--since MLCers deny they are having an MLC, during the crisis and may deny their past experience once the crisis is complete.

OMG.... please!!!!  So now we TOTALLY disregard any evidence from the actual source of the disturbance.  OMG.   PLEASE!  After all, WHAT WOULD THEY KNOW?   
 
I'll remember to that particular COMMENT to the bank DGU!

Hugs Stayed

[Trustandlove]

I've heard from the spouses of several men that have come through MLC, and AFTER they are through, sometimes quite a while after, they are then good at saying what it was like.  As unreliable as they were while in the thick of it, they are now very reliable about it.  Their fog has cleared.  They are, of course, two examples of those who are willing to talk about it, at least to their spouse if not to anyone else.

I also not the example of one of us here who has written her story about being on the other side of the coin, and also a male who realises that he was coming out of his own MLC and then his wife went in...  both are now very reliable sources of what it was like. 

So I think that while it's true that self-reporting is not a good source while it is going on, afterwards it may well be.

[Dontgiveup]

My H has repeatedly told me he would not have had an MLC were he in a place that finding food or avoiding slaugher took up all of his waking moments.  That's coming right from the horses mouth...so why shouldn't I believe it?

From RCR's article What is A Midlife Crisis?
I find self-reporting to be possibly the least reliable source--since MLCers deny they are having an MLC, during the crisis and may deny their past experience once the crisis is complete.

OMG.... please!!!!  So now we TOTALLY disregard any evidence from the actual source of the disturbance.  OMG.   PLEASE!  After all, WHAT WOULD THEY KNOW?   
 
I'll remember to that particular COMMENT to the bank DGU!

Hugs Stayed

I don't read in what RCR wrote where it says totally disregard.

[stayed]