[Dontgiveup]

And of course I have the friend whos ex-wife married the other man.....and recently divorced the other man after a year and a half marriage.

[phoenixwoman1]

Thanks everyone for your responses.  I'm getting much better about not letting exHs R with OW get to me, but knowing the statistics really helps! Since they've broken up so many times over the past year (albeit for a few days at the most) I have a hard time believing it will last.  ExH seems to cling to her tenaciously though.  I guess if he's willing to except her being pregnant with another man's child there is absolutely nothing he won't put up with...at least for now.  I don't question my kids at all about their time there, but they don't come home telling me about any fights or anything.  It seems things are pleasant. Very hard to figure out, and I'm getting better about not analyzing it all the time, but by no means perfect.

[LettingGo]

her being pregnant with another man's child

Phoenixwoman...... are you F'ing KIDDING ME?

Ok, well your husband wins the prize for MOST AFFAIR DOWN! This is the MOST insane thing I've ever heard.... I thought it was MammaBear's husband moving in with his convenience store ow that he only knew for two weeks... but.... going to read your entire thread for this bit of Jerry Springer, hahaha!!

I wouldn't worry AT ALL about OW affair if they break up constantly like my husband and his OW did and still do, although, in his MIND, he's permanently left her, but physically.... not so much...

Re-read RCR's articles on the affair down... they're the BEST kind... especially the OBVIOUS ones, cuz the REST of the world will go 

[LisaLives]

MF, I hope you come back to this thread.  My H is getting married to OW also, and S12 and I just got back from a wedding of a girl who was like a daughter to me.  I had a business and we are in a college town, so I have several girls that I have treated like family over the years, but this was far and away, the one who meant most to my whole family.  WOW, did a LOT of questions come up, about promises and life, and weddings, but most important to me, and one I have avoided thinking about, but it raised it's nasty head.  My kids have always been overly concerned with what happens to them if we die.  Probably because we have always lived far from any family and even then there are few suitable parental situations.  So if H goes first there are no issues, all would be the same as before.  However, if I go first, wow...

Have you resolved this?  Did you give him any input?  There is no way I willl allow HER to have any of my money, that's for sure.  She can have the H, and she could end up with my kids, but holy hell, I am not going to give her anything I can actually control.  I told H this some time ago and he blew a gasket--that he is no longer the beneficiary of my life insurance...  And what if he should pass soon after me, will she get my kids...  How insane is that scenario?  But in reality there is nothing I can do to prevent it.  That's what S12 was asking me, what happens to them if I die, and I told him I couldn't answer that, only his Dad could.  So I sent H an e-mail telling him that it had come up.  It has come up before, but I really think now we have to address is since we both need new wills, etc. 

 

[LettingGo]

LisaLives... OW doesn't want your kids... even if she is married to your husband for the rest of her life....even if you pass... she doesn't really sign up for that scenario... but it could happen, and it doesn't have to be all bad... but get your will in order.

[LisaLives]

LG--If OW wants my H in the state he's in, why wouldn't she want my awesome kids and all the money that comes with them?  I think she would TELL him she wants his kids.  She would have to say that to get him, just like she says her kids are going to share a room so that my kids can have their own rooms for the two months they spend there every year...  And he is going to convince himself and try to convince my kids that she loves them--he tried to tell me that on BD (which was why I hired my attorney the next day...)...  One day when SHE wakes up she'll realize she doesn't want my kids, but what if I get hit by a bus tomorrow, and remember he had a heart attack in March...  I am not freaking out, really, I knew I had to deal with this, but I was just wondering if anyone else had, legally, and if there are any options I haven't considered...  It's all so crazy...     

[LettingGo]

Lisa... she doesn't want your kids... she's just posturing for your husband and he is falling for it because "people break up all the time and then their families are blended and everyone gets along and is happy"... make provisions for your kids the best you can and try and stay alive, that's all!But you're insane if you think that just because she wants your husband and his paycheck she wants his kids.... She doesn't even GRASP the concept of your husband paying child support and spousal support.... she's IGNORANT!! Moneygrubbers usually are....
 

[Buggy31]

LG and LL

Might I add that moonlocks addresses this very topic in a very appropriate "NEW Schmoopie video"...Check it out here.


http://soulmateshmoopies.wordpress.com/2011/06/27/part-15-my-ex-wife-is-a-zombie/

Hysterical....really

[phoenixwoman1]

Letting Go,  My XH's OW doesn't even have a job unless you count being a career welfare mother The thing is that he doesn't seem ashamed at all.  He brought her to his brother's wedding this past weekend noticably preggers and all!!! Apparently not ashamed and quite proud of her.  I'm thinking FOO thinks he is a hero as well since he "saved" her from her Oxycontin habit.  Not her cigarette habit though..still smoking pregnant (probably smoking pot and drinking too but not sure).  Poor innocent baby:(

[LisaLives]

PW1, Isn't that the kicker in the whole thing--they have no shame whatsoever.  It's just amazing...