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Author Topic: Discussion MLC Affair versus Normal Affair/Other Affair Types

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Discussion Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#40: December 02, 2011, 08:10:49 PM
How long is the 'affair' lasting
This is a whirlwind started from what I can figure in May of 2010 ended Jan 2011

Is it an affair down?
Well she was fat ugly and an exprostitute, She lied and cried a lot to manipulate and inflict guilt. Same age as me.

What prolongs affair, can we break it up?
I don't have a clue but my stratagy was to give him what he wanted as fast as humanly possible because I knew the faster things went the sooner they would break up, Her true colors would come out and it would be over. And it was.

Is there anything unusual about the affair?
Probably the part where he got sucked into trying to save her AFTER he was actually trying to get rid of her; but moved her into our house anyway. :o

How does OW affair affect the MLCer
Early on he was like "I thought I was dead!! She makes me feel so alive!!" Then it turned into "How could I have been this stupid??"



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Is it ego or spirit that governs us to question the answers; or answer the questions?
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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#41: December 03, 2011, 07:10:50 AM
InThis:

That has to be a MLC'ers script my H said exactly the same thing.

"I thought I was dead!! She makes me feel so alive!!" Then it turned into "How could I have been this stupid??"

I am so amazed that they all follow the script so closely. 

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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#42: December 03, 2011, 07:34:45 PM
Yeah you should have seen him Sassy he was practically dancing-and this guy don't dance.

I was standing there with the tears just running down my face. I was just devastated. He's leaning over looking in my eyes smiling and just joyous. I mean honestly the MOST elated look on his face.

I'll never forget it as long as I live.
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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#43: December 05, 2011, 05:42:57 AM
Just another lie they tell themselves.  Trust me, they feel it and believe it at first.  But eventually reality sets in and the BS they are experiencing fades.  H has recently told me how much they fought (it was a lot towards the end).  Sounds like it was really making him feel alive!!! NOT.  I said pretty funny you wanted to leave your family for someone you have been with for 8 months and constantly fighting, wow, fun.  Heck, I don't think we had a major fight until we were married for about ten years.  We both laughed at how stupid he was.  He can see it now . . . but it certainly couldn't see it then.  OW is a drug and they are addicted.
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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#44: December 05, 2011, 06:14:53 AM
Sassy- how long was H with OW?
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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#45: December 05, 2011, 06:33:13 AM
How long is the 'affair' lasting  Started Oct 2010-July 2011  10 months but there were several breakups and my H was away for 3-4 months during their affair. Emotional attachment has continued from July until recently.


Is it an affair down?  Yes, while she has a good job ( a nurse), she appeared independant but quickly got needy whith constant contact. She is way uglier. She also, I believe has some mental issues, 48 yrs old never married and can get obsessive with emails, texts and phone calls. Recently is getting more desparate since H cut all contact.

What prolongs affair, can we break it up?  I don't know. But, I think it helped for me to never contact her, show my strength and independance as she got needier. Her personality problem's is what I think did her in when I stepped back. I don't think I had much influence except to stand my ground.

How does OW affair affect the MLCer  It causes intense emotions, guilt, shame now. He is embarrassed and everyone had told him what an affair down she was..no one liked her. He got no validation from his friends although they were there for him.  If he ends it with me they will be there for him. I would not expect anything less from them.

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Me  53
H  68
Married 23 yrs
BD 8/10
OW 10/10 Gone 7/11
8/11 home again
8/12 Reconnecting
11/13 Rebuilding a stronger marraige


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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#46: December 05, 2011, 09:17:03 AM
H was with Ow eight months with multiple breakups, lots of pressure and lots of fighting.  What was so attractive about that?
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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#47: December 05, 2011, 09:27:44 AM
I wonder that myself all the time...that was a short relationship.
Just was curious as I know all situations are different.
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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#48: December 05, 2011, 09:31:53 AM
I agree in MLC terms it was short (not for me though).  I firmly believe that if H wasn't fired from his job (they worked together) that this crap would still be going on.  He got fired because he couldn't pay attention to work, ow and his family.  His life was falling apart at the seams.  While it is a struggle now, I thank the Lord for his intervention.
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Re: THE MLC AFFAIR
#49: December 05, 2011, 11:04:41 AM
Sassy, I'm sorry- didn't mean that to come out like it did.
I guess I meant short in comparison to my H's relationship...by all means I know
the standing seems forever and didn't mean that your pain was shorter than anyone else's.
sorry if it came across as condescending...
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