[OneHotMess]

I have learned when my h is nice, To be scared. Usually means he is up to something and I will find out real soon. Mine started out a low energy wallower and has become a very special kind of  crazy MLCer. But I do feel a lot guilt from him when he is in mr nice guy mode. He had a lot of guilt and confusion while living in the house. Once he left, all hell broke loose.

My best advice, don’t trust anything. I was told many times “ trust both they say and only 1/2 of what you see”. Best advise I ever got.  Thank him for whatever and play nice when he is and don’t  engage with his monster self. They remind me of Jekyll and Hyde. Just be very cautious about everything. The best thing you can do is detach and gal. That behavior will mess with your mind if you don’t detach. I know it is very hard but it is what needs to be done for your sanity.

[FamilyIsMyGoal]

I am curious; when your MLC monster shows up, is it like a different face?  I mean in a physical sense.  H's facial lines are different - like I've never seen before

[New Day Rising]

Mine has started playing Mr Nice Guy too. I have to admit, I'm constantly wondering what his motive is? I wonder if he's coming out of MLC and has just started to be nice as he realises that we have to co-parent, but it doesn't make my brain think overtime. I wonder if he's being genuine or not. I get 'sorry' a lot. I get 'I don't want to argue'. I recently got 'I just wanted to say our kids are gorgeous and are turning out really well and you're doing a great job'. I couldn't have found it more patronising, to be honest.

Today, I have lost my sh** and have come across as a complete loony and am annoyed at myself, while he remains 'Mr Nice Guy'.

I think I preferred Monster.  I don't, of course, but Mr Nice Guy is making thinking 'What's going on? Something is not right'.

On Thursday he called and asked me if I'd like to go out for a meal with him and the kids. I declined as he is still with the OW and I'm not getting involved in all of that.

[Never say never]

There is an article on HB regarding that.  I can't remember which article it was but it was one of the Q and A sessions.  Maybe someone can help out with that.

HB said that when Mr. Nice Guy appears, just lay low.  If he continues to be nice, he may be coming out of his tunnel a little.  If he monsters you AT ALL for an unnecessary reason, go right back to ignoring him because he is not near ready yet. 

That's all I can offer on that.  I have found it to be true in my situation, though.

[FamilyIsMyGoal]

Oh I totally get that!

  Last night I got the most vile emails from Monster (we are starting legal proceedings) I have ever gotten.  Then a Mr. nice guy email this morning.  It's all horrible.  Mr. Nice Monster used to get me pulled back in emotionally, but last nights were so bad, that this morning I am actually feeling grateful to be rid of H for the first time since BD.

[Not Applicable]

My monster is almost gone now but when he was monstering he was channeling his abusive father. His voice became EXACTLY like his father's. I knew his father, I know the difference between my H's voice and his father's. He was possessed by his father. The same intonation, the same expressions (according to MIL). And then he would forget these incidents as if they never happened. Just adding to the whole sense that he was possessed.

[Mortesbride]

Well mine is no where near done yet.

But it definitely is the new pattern. Wallowing, pitiful, sick and drained looking....or Mr nice guy offering to help with his kids and bringing in gifts, and texting like we are BFFs.

It does make you suspicious. I assume part of it is the guilt, part of it is trying to pretend reality isn't reality....and maybe some of it is anchor checking.

[Mortesbride]

Mine goes really creepy psycho style. 

Cold dead eyes that tell you he just doesn't give a toss. He could probably choke you and walk away without a care in the world.

And often he looks a bit...manic...sorta like a twisted jokery laugh to him. Like he is amused by his own nastiness.

Occasionally he will yell and scream, but the really scarey stuff is the slightly twisted smirk as he digs you with a painful remark in a low 'calm' voice.

[Searching4Answers]

Mine goes really creepy psycho style. 

Cold dead eyes that tell you he just doesn't give a toss. He could probably choke you and walk away without a care in the world.

And often he looks a bit...manic...sorta like a twisted jokery laugh to him. Like he is amused by his own nastiness.

Occasionally he will yell and scream, but the really scarey stuff is the slightly twisted smirk as he digs you with a painful remark in a low 'calm' voice.

I remember this all too well.

The way it switched right in front of me was scary! It didn't seem like he had any control over it either which scared the heck out of me.

[Mortesbride]

Yeah..he has always done a smaller version of it. The switch flips and he was gone for the night...but then the next day he was back to normal.

Now..you just can't flip the switch back. Don't know when it will go off...and who knows when he will 'reset'.