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Author Topic: Discussion Ask the Mentor...

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Discussion Re: Ask the Mentor...
#140: July 23, 2012, 08:21:19 PM
I told him after BD that I wanted him to fight for me.

Oh, how FOOLISH I was!

He had no fight in him! He said so.

I want him to fight for me, not sob on the floor. I want him to woo me.

He can't.

I want misery for OW. She is smug. I know, I know, she's insecure and crazy, but I see smug. She hurt my children, she hurt me, she hurts my xH. I want misery for her.
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To love is to value. Only a rationally selfish man, a man of self-esteem, is capable of love—because he is the only man capable of holding firm, consistent, uncompromising, unbetrayed values. The man who does not value himself, cannot value anything or anyone. --Ayn Rand
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#141: July 24, 2012, 02:38:06 AM
My H texted me on January 1st that he realized that 2011 had been a very difficult year for me and that he he knows he is responsible for that. That seems nice doesn't it. But the then: 'I hope that in 2012 you also will find happiness again'. The last sentence shows he still lacks empathy.
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#142: July 24, 2012, 04:38:01 PM
this is making me so sad. Hugs everyone!
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previous name: nopressure
together since 1999. dp since 2002, m since 2005
H filed for divorce 11/2011. H withdrew the divorce petition and closed the case 7/2012. Limbo and "dating" H for 6 years. H filed for divorce 2/2017. H is currently in Major Depression and is non-responsive.
J

JAG

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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#143: July 25, 2012, 11:31:09 PM
Could someone give some examples of how to approach the paragraph below? What could I say? How could I say it? In what context? Isn't this relationship talk?

"It is okay to confirm to your MLCer that you wish this were not happening, that you miss him and that the circumstances sadden you. But let him know only in an informational manner rather than through showing those things with emotional energy that is or risks becoming uncontrolled. Let him know that regardless of the circumstances you are choosing to find and create joy in your life."

Thanks :)
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#144: July 26, 2012, 12:03:57 AM
Dear H,

I hope you know that I do not wish for anything like this to happen and that you are with me emotionally, spiritually, and physically. I also accept that this is not going to happen right now. I also want to let you know that GOD has shown me that life does go on and that I can and will create joy in my life as well as the lives of our children.

Always,

Jag

or

You ungrateful cheating loser. I hope you get an ingrown toenail, develop halitosis, and come down with ringworm. I also pray that ow gets acne that makes it look like her face caught on fire and someone used an ice pick to put it out. Also I hope she confesses to you that she was once a man and was worried after the operation that no one would accept him as a her.

By the way, I miss you but in the meantime, I am gambling away our retirement in Vegas so I can forget about you while I have a little fun.

Love Jag
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"Always look in the mirror and love what you see."
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#145: July 26, 2012, 02:33:28 AM
Ready, that was genius.
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c
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#146: July 26, 2012, 07:08:29 AM
Ready...thanks for the good laugh this morning. Absolutely hilarious  :)
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#147: July 26, 2012, 10:50:32 AM
Good one Ready I got a good laugh from it also. Thanks I can always use one.
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T
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#148: July 29, 2012, 08:27:50 PM
My husband hasn't gone out lately.  Seems like he may b trying to come home.  How should i respond he looks miserable.  im wondering if he isn't happy.
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Surviving in Phila.
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Re: Ask the Mentor...
#149: July 30, 2012, 03:13:28 PM
Ready,

That is sooooooo damn funny. I vote for the second paragraph. Im laughing so hard.  ;D ;D ;D ;D ;D

FH
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Finding Hope
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