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Author Topic: MLC Monster Money Questions

L
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MLC Monster Re: Money Questions
#20: February 01, 2011, 11:31:53 AM
Let's see........when my xH left me (year ago) he took care of that months bills and then insisted that I start up my own account (he already had) and split the money we had collected together.  He even stated that I could have half even though he didn't feel like I "contributed" half. Really?  I had a retirement pay and regular pay which went into our joint accounts just as he did........AND he controlled ALL the finances.  I didn't argue with him over it because in his first marriage his wife had total control.  From what I gathered, treated him like a child, giving him an allowance and then questioning everything he spent his money on.  I felt that had to be degrading for him as a man.  My xH was always very good with handling the finances so I didn't have any problems with it.  He spent ALL his "half" within 6 months of leaving me........buying all kinds of "stuff" for himself and OW.  Later, after he broke up with OW he told me that he regretted it (her) and knew she only wanted money from him.  He did a lot of stupid things in the first 6 months.  My xH talked about the money a lot in the beginning after BD........acting as if he was the only one who worked/earned anything.  I really resented being treated like that.  I'm glad we split the finances quick though.
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Re: Money Questions
#21: February 01, 2011, 01:50:30 PM
I merged this thread in with an older one that we had on this subject, I hope that is OK but gives you some more insight.
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Re: Money Questions
#22: February 01, 2011, 02:09:34 PM
OP,

Thanks. 

I should have looked for an older thread before I started this one.

I didn't join this Community until September.

Thanks,

L
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M -65,  ExH - 71 (57 at BD)
M - 33 years (did the last 3 years count?)
D - 35, D -31, S - 31
BD 5/29/2010, Ran away from home - 8/15/2010,
Found out about affair - 2/11
H asks for divorce - 8/11
H filed for divorce 10/11
Announced "new" girlfriend 12/12 (3rd OW)
Divorce final 06/13 (I decided to finish it)
Dumped OW#3 9/15 (After 4 years)
Married OW#1 2019
OW#1 filed for divorce from ExH 9/24
ExH divorced - 5/25
ExH now seeing OW#2 - High School girlfriend - again

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Re: Money Questions
#23: February 01, 2011, 02:11:47 PM
Writing Mom,
I would start protecting yourself as I doubt that the funds will keep coming. Do not assume that your financial security is on his radar.
My 2 cents.
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me 51
H 51
M 27
BD 1/15/ 10 then BD 8/21/10
D final 8/13

B
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Re: Money Questions
#24: May 03, 2011, 10:35:30 AM
ANy one no if an LBS is responsible for credit card debt acquired after seperation?  I live in PA and there is no legal seperation.  A divorce has been filed. Would I be responsible for the credit he has accrued  since leaving
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Pain is not a punishment, pleasure not a reward.  ~Pema Chodron

A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her.  ~Oscare Wilde

M 33
H 33
Married 9 years
3 children (D8, D3 and S7months)
BD-Spring of 2009 EA
H Filed 09/2010

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Re: Money Questions
#25: May 03, 2011, 10:44:30 AM
Hey Bugs,
It probably depends on the State that you live in.

In California, the LBS is not responsible for any  credit card debt acquired after filing for legal separation or divorce.  (OK - Please remind me why I have not filed for legal separation????)

L
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M -65,  ExH - 71 (57 at BD)
M - 33 years (did the last 3 years count?)
D - 35, D -31, S - 31
BD 5/29/2010, Ran away from home - 8/15/2010,
Found out about affair - 2/11
H asks for divorce - 8/11
H filed for divorce 10/11
Announced "new" girlfriend 12/12 (3rd OW)
Divorce final 06/13 (I decided to finish it)
Dumped OW#3 9/15 (After 4 years)
Married OW#1 2019
OW#1 filed for divorce from ExH 9/24
ExH divorced - 5/25
ExH now seeing OW#2 - High School girlfriend - again

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M
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Re: Money Questions
#26: May 03, 2011, 01:07:28 PM
NJ follows the same rules:  once the filing for D has been made, each person is responsible for their own debts accrued after filing process kicks off, and the "Discovery Phase" (the first round of documents due to the court/lawyers after the D filing) backs that up by only requiring financial positions as of the D filing date.  My xH bought a brand new car, took a $34,000 loan three weeks after leaving, and the court awarded him with sole responsibility for payment of the full loan amount.  Oops, too bad!
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B
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Re: Money Questions
#27: May 03, 2011, 08:16:43 PM
I don't know what kind of debt he created before he filed but he left in June and there is proof of this because he changed his address.  I do know that he had a credit card, solely in his name, that he was making larger payments on and that he took out a credit card for a retainer.  I'm hoping the seperation date will count as we don't have legal seperation in PA.  I'll have to talk to my L
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Pain is not a punishment, pleasure not a reward.  ~Pema Chodron

A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her.  ~Oscare Wilde

M 33
H 33
Married 9 years
3 children (D8, D3 and S7months)
BD-Spring of 2009 EA
H Filed 09/2010

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Re: Money Questions
#28: May 04, 2011, 01:49:02 PM
Courts do look at dates and debts. For example, one month prior to filing for banruptcy, I max out every single one of my cards will be seen as not good.

If after you h moved out, he should be held accountable for debts he has accrued. That is why you need to set the date he moved out of the home. Then the items he purchased did not enhance you or your home.

In my situation, she would freak if she found out how much she would have to pay including half of my student loans Hahahahahahahaha
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B
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Re: Money Questions
#29: May 04, 2011, 05:29:23 PM
Yes
He is the moron who set the date by changing his address right away and stating it in a Lawyer letter that I have.  Funny you mentioned this ready I was just talking to my sis about it today but  if the divorce goes through I think he should be responsible for half of my grad loan as through our marriage we paid down his college debt and I expected that I would be supported in a double income for my marriage.  So perhaps this might be a possiblity.  Plus I want spousal until my youngest starts school because I surrendered 8 years of income growth to raise my family which was a mutual decision and I want to be supported in the familiy decision we made...nothing to do with marriage...and everything to do with bussiness.
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Pain is not a punishment, pleasure not a reward.  ~Pema Chodron

A man can be happy with any woman as long as he does not love her.  ~Oscare Wilde

M 33
H 33
Married 9 years
3 children (D8, D3 and S7months)
BD-Spring of 2009 EA
H Filed 09/2010

 

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