[SpecialK]

Hi All

What are your views on this, have you ever had a reading and was it successfully?

I have got myself into a situation where I'm hooked, I know I'm looking for reassurance and I don't trust gut feel, so need conformation all the time.   It's now getting out of hand, I can't afford so consequently find myself in debt and can't afford to do what I want to do.  I am ashamed because it's become an addition and I want\have to stop.

Sorry I needed to get this out there - I'm angry at myself for letting me get into this situation and I know it's only me that can stop it.   

Thank you so much for listening - I feel better getting it off my chest.

SKx

t's getting totally out of hand, I can't afford.  It's become an addictio

[Voyager]

SK,
Of course you want reassurance and validation, but the very fact you've put this up here shows that you know this isn't going to help. But you are brave to do so and this is a big step forward for you.
Don't be ashamed SK, don't be ashamed of feeling hurt and low. I don't think there will be many people here who would either judge you, or say if they thought there was a way of fixing this or reading the future they wouldn't have taken it at some point on the journey. I know I would.
You want to ease pain and know what's going to happen, pain will ease and at some point on your journey you will have a clearer path forward. but this takes time and self reflection. Maybe thats starting for you now, and that's what's led you here.
Whatever you need from us to help you out let us know, we're here to help,always.
Love to you.xxx

[SpecialK]

Thank you so much, I really appreciate it.  I'm in tears now.  I so want to stop, and have to find a way of talking myself out of it\find something else to do.

Thanks again.

SP x

[Rollercoasterider]

SpecialK,

Have you read Mermaid's thread about the I'Ching? Do that and go to the Coaching Archives and read what I wrote to Readytofixmyselfirst. In there I talked about seeing a psychic as my regular counselor.

It sounds to me as though you are hoping for literal answers through metaphorical means. It doesn't work that way. Tarot is a toold that can help to break through literal thinking; it is like a jump start of ideas. But you are trying to get literal answers and that is not how it works. It also can be misinterpreted.

Often a newbie Stander wants answers about their spouse and how to fix their marriage when the answers they need are about how to start by focusing on themselves. A person may interpret the messages as applying to what they want rather than what they need.

[Voyager]

SK
You've reached the place where things will start to get better, might not seem like it but you are seeing what needs to happen. And as you've wisely said it's about taking your mind off it and thinking how you can distract and take away that need.
Are there particular times of the day? Are weekends worse than weekdays? If you can find the pattern and triggers you will learn to head the urges off at the pass.
And please remember that others have tried to make it better for themselves in all sorts of different ways, some people may not feel as courageous as you are and come out and say it, doesn't mean you're the only person who has done this or something similar.
Keep us posted SK and lots of (((((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))))))))
 

[SpecialK]

I can't thank you enough, I've been bottling up for a very long time, knowing that it's not right.  I do when I get horrible thoughts come into my mind and I can't fight them or when my friends give me their opinion and I take them board.   I've been numerous promises to my Mum and Sister not to do it again, but I've broken them several times.  I think I will also talk to my Councellor about it on Monday night.

Having said that, the woman I talk to is very, very good. She's is also a trained Councellor.  She understands me and knows how my mind works.  She's been brilliant.  But I have to step back from it, let things happen, learn to trust my own initiution, rather than let others take control.

I can't stop crying now, I think it's a sign that I'm ready to give this up.

Thank you so much, it means so much.  I've needed to get this out in the open.

xxx

[SpecialK]

Hi Rollercoaster

I have just read through your article on Physics - very interesting.  Yours sounds very much like mine.  She has given me very good insight to myself, the stuff I need to work on and she has told me that I have to focus on me, not him.  The first time I spoke to her to picked up straight away about his crisis, without me saying anything.  Again very much like it's been discused on here, she has told me several times there is nothing I can to do fix him, he has to do this in his own time, not to take it as a personal rejection, just duck and keep out the way.  But as she often tells me,  this is my time, focus on me, not me.  I do trust her as I feel she would never ever tell me what I want to here, even if it meant hearing me (in a good way).

Thanks Rollercoaster, it was very interesting reading.

SK xx

[covenantkeeper]

I personally don't care for these things. However, that doesn't mean I haven't wondered about the future and tempted to find a way to see what is going to happen. It's just that I believe everyone has free will to make choices, so even if someone told me my h was going to do something....that doesn't mean he won't change his mind later. And since I am a Christian, I believe it's best to leave the future up to God. I have enough I am responsible for......let God take care of the future.

None of us are going to criticize you. Goodness, if you knew what we have all done, especially early on in this MLC journey, you would be amazed! I would venture to say that every one of us is ashamed of things we've done or things we've said. We are hurt beyond belief! Our entire worlds have fallen apart. Everything we thought that was right in the world is upside down and we have no clue what we are going to do! So, yes, we all make decisions that later on we realize were just pretty stupid. 

I think since you are feeling this way, you're well on your way to moving forward. I think a good way to break this habit is to get on here and post the next time you feel the need to see this psychic. You mentioned that she was a good counselor. So? There are a lot of good counselors. I think you need to find someone else so you won't be tempted to get sucked in again and cause yourself more debt. And, if you can't afford a counselor......post here. Read the articles here. Go to the library and check out books on midlife crisis.

You can do this!! You know they say the steps to recovery are to admit you have a problem. You did that. You are strong enough to recognize you have a problem. Now, you can move on. You can do this! Just put one foot in front of the other one. One step at a time! 

[in His hands]

SK, my heart breaks for you.  I love your honesty!  CK is right. We've all done things we wouldn't ordinarily do; anything for some kind of answer/guidance.  I've resisted the urge myself.  Keep posting!  We're here for you.  God Bless!  iHh

[LifeGoesOn]

As RCR said upthread, predictions are only possibilities given current circumstances. You can use what they say to access your intuition. Spend time pondering the responses you get, and making choices based upon what you already know, and possible consequences to your behavior. Pay attention to your bodily responses as you ponder, as this will help you access your intuition.

All of these are free:
I like to use the I ching site click here

and this tarot site. Much is tongue in cheek.

This tarot site is fun too.

Stick with the free ones, they are just as good. Don't overuse them, the answers will only become more obscure, not clearer.

You can also get a book and cards or coins of your own. These are just tools to guide your thinking and open your 'ears'. 

Rcr's recent newsletter discusses "How to meditate". I think you will find this very helpful too. You do not need to pay $ for others to tell you answers that are within you. You can find them yourself.