[Thundarr]

XW bought running shoes too, and I doubt she's done more than a fast walk since she moved out!  All new clothes of course and she would often wear D20's clothes that were left at her apartment.  And does a Corolla that she paid sticker price on (which was at least 50% more than the car was worth) count as an MLC vehicle?  It does have aluminum wheels and dark tinted windows.  It makes a great car for a teenager, honestly.  She just went to the car lot and did not try to haggle on the price or nothing, and traded our family van in for a pittance of what it was worth.  I guess car salesman probably have a keen eye for MLCers and know they are all more than happy to get rid of the reminders of their past life and so splurge on a new one.  And I won't even talk about the branded sweatshirts.......

But, seriously, cuffed jeans at 50?  Please share pics on the alt as I cannot wait to see!!

[Trustandlove]

I guess I have to bring up the purple pointy shoes.....   to be fair I've only seen those once, but I do know his shoe wardrobe contains those, as well as a pair of shiny lace-ups with heels as well....  there are other pointy shoes as well.   He used to hate those. 

Must point out that I don't think pointy shoes are bad in and of themselves, just not on a man of his age and build.  And as such a change.

Lycra does seem to be a thing here among middle-aged men, even if not in crisis -- or rather their "crisis" is that jokey kind, where the bike and the lycra are the only manifestations. 

[Lost]

Wow, this MLC truely is an identity crisis, all these clothes and 'accessoires ' (vehicles) bought to try out what fits or how they feel I suppose. All these activities started and not completed. Makes me wonder - my H certainly had that trait anyway, made me even think 'no wonder in a way he does not 'complete' his mariage but jumps of the middle. Wonder how many MLCler have had this tendancy of not completing things/courses/activities as 'normal' character trait already pre-BD?

Mine had only bought an expensive mountain bike, that is it would have been enormously expensive but he got it for a relative interesting price. If he would have used it. Never did a lot during the 3 years pre BD though, and it ended up with me here and I must say it is great for our Sunday bike tour with the kids   But each time he is here for kid's vacation, he takes it to cycle miles to / from the hotel. Guess he regrets he did not have the refex on BD day and it went on the moving van...

[Stillpraying]

...All these activities started and not completed. Makes me wonder - my H certainly had that trait anyway, made me even think 'no wonder in a way he does not 'complete' his mariage but jumps of the middle. Wonder how many MLCler have had this tendancy of not completing things/courses/activities as 'normal' character trait already pre-BD?..........

Even my exMIL said "H is a quitter".  I found it frustrating in our marriage when he would just stop things or not get on with stuff he said he would do.  He quit bands, Feeding homeless people (he led a team which he was great at), changed churches multiple times (doesn't go at all now), many many jobs, etc etc.  But I also see the same trait in his mum when it comes to people.  He grand daughter has also observed "It's all or nothing with Nan.  You are either in or out and there's no in between".  It's like that with H too.  And right now I know I am 'OUT' with both of them.

[Still Kicking]

That's another "Bingo" for me, too.  He will try at something for a year and then it is on to the next thing.  He will admit himself that he has never known what he wants to do with his life. 

[panda]

My H did complete jobs - always took pride in doing lots of DIY things, even finished our kitchen pre BD.  Now it seems he cannot even change a toilet roll (leaves the empty one there with a new one on side) or throw milk carton away (puts back in fridge empty). 

I am now realising though that all the expensive purchases made last year that I really did not want to go ahead with, were part of his condition.  MY H also bought a mountain bike that was never used either.  And since then we have had lots of hoodies which I kept telling him he was too old for.   He even bought a t-shirt from the teenage section - I didn't really think anything of it then!!!   

And now he has gone from a BMW to a mini cooper.  Hysterical watching the children try to get in the back - the car seats didn't fit of course and S7 had to sit in the front.  I laughed at all three of them driving off, my H looking like a 17 year old.  I wonder if he will ever look back on the car he has now and think 'Why did I buy that?'

[2.roads]

Oh.my.goodness.

Wonder how many MLCler have had this tendancy of not completing things/courses/activities as 'normal' character trait already pre-BD?

This just keeps getting better...or hokier. 

S18 and I JUST had a conversation this past weekend about how hard it ALWAYS was to get H to finish ANYTHING !! Our whole house (and property) is a mish-mash of half completed projects and repairs.

Over the years, he would help the kids start a project like a go-cart or tree fort but never finished them... It was actually a family joke that H was the absent minded professor who always started 10 new things before he got the last 50 completed. Really, it wasn't so funny as it was a huge source of contention in our marriage....so much clutter and wasted money because he couldn't seem to finish anything he started.

So no surprise that he walked away from a broken marriage or that he seems unable to focus long enough to even finalize a divorce.

Apparently OW is beginning to find his procratination and personal habits frustrating. She bought a house which she and H will be moving into in a couple of weeks. The house needs to have the roof reshingled. H thought he was the man for the job...but she asked her BIL to do it! 

I wonder if these procratinators will come out of the tunnel any more organized? 

[Almost there]

My exH hasn't gotten a new vehicle. I don't think he can afford it. He does spend a lot of money for online video games and bought some more gun accesories. I asked if he still went to the shooting range because he started doing that again just before BD. He said no because the government had started buying up ammo after Sandy Hook. He sounded like he thought it was a consepracy to make sure he couldn't do anything fun.
He used to run and scuba dive when he was younger but he has serious issues with his ankle and can't do those anymore. In fact it has severely limited what he can do. However he has given up on any physical activity. He could swim but he doesn't want to deal with the indignity of using special equipment to get in and out. I used to be sympathic but now he just strikes me as pathetic because he is using it as an excuse to do nothing except have a pity party. He even used it as an excuse once for not coming up with stuff to do with our D9.
As far as dressing its about the same except for one work shirt which is fuchsia pink, a color I never would have thought he would wear. He also has gained weight and just look so much older.

[CallanG]

I got the memory lapse this morning . Our 14 yr old cat is sick, he has been up and down for a couple of weeks . So I emailed H to let him know the situation and said I would let him know if things got worse.

He called :
H "why did you not call me about it?"
M "you asked me not to contact you because you needed to sort your emotions out"
H "I dont remember that , when did I say that "
M "last time you were here about a month ago "
H "Oh I dont remember that"
M "So you do want me to contact you"
H "No I cant speak to you but let me know how the cat is "

I am going to get the cat to call him to let him know how he is , that way I am not breaking to no contact rule . Actually the cat is to intelligent to speak to H .

 

[Musica]

Hahaha!!