[Thundarr]

Just saw this today and all the known factors seem to be in place.  Sometimes things end up badly for the LBS in ways we haven't considered.


http://thestir.cafemom.com/in_the_news/164993/womans_sexy_text_message_to?utm_medium=sm&utm_source=rss&utm_content=in_the_news_rssfeed

[Learning strength]

Wow! So very sad! And here I sit, struggling with how to forgive since I'm just in the beginning of this nightmare, could be the eye opener I needed! Thank u for sharing

[trusting]

That is incredibly sad.  My heart goes out to the family she left behind for many reasons.

As far as MLC goes, I personally don't see any indication of it in that article.  Granted, we know nothing except she had a one night stand.  Seems to me MLCers are more looking for "relationships" (and I use that term loosely as MLCers aren't capable of having a healthy one with anyone while in crisis).

[OldPilot]

Sorry but it wasnt the LBS husbands fault that he did not instantly fore give his cheating wife.
And even if he had she was obviously in immense PAIN to cheat and then feel guilty about it.
I dont think that even if he instantly forgave her that this would have played out that much differently.

At least thats my .02.

[Songanddance]

Like most newspaper articles - we never get the true story.
Doubt highly this is MLC and as her H says - nothing is worth taking her life over.

This is much deeper than MLC or a one night stand and says much about the woman's state of mind which was probably in a very dark place in the first place. Suicidal thoughts are symptoms of severe depression but the act has a much deeper root. I know my D has severe depression and has many suicidal thoughts but she knows that she wouldn't do it.
Not only that most of the MLCers state that they feel suicidal but know that they wouldn't.

[in it]

I agree with OP and the fact she was a police officer speaks volumes also. Simply could not deal with the fact her dishonor of the job was reflected in what she did in cheating.

[honour]

Just saw this today and all the known factors seem to be in place.  Sometimes things end up badly for the LBS in ways we haven't considered.


http://thestir.cafemom.com/in_the_news/164993/womans_sexy_text_message_to?utm_medium=sm&utm_source=rss&utm_content=in_the_news_rssfeed

Given a lot of the LBS here are struggling at maintaining healthy boundaries with cheaters, I feel a little anxious that drawing attention to such an article at a forum such as this is going to be counter productive for the many here who need to detach for the good of their own well-being and the well-being of their children. In the vast majority of cases it is the LBS who is at most risk of suicide. Potentially burdening already traumatized LBS with the fear and guilt that if they do the wise thing and protect themselves or even not express immediate forgiveness, then the cheater may commit suicide, makes me uneasy.

And the article writer says, "
"While I don't think anyone condones cheating, it is certainly not worth taking your life over"
That may be so, but these cheaters have no problem pushing the LBS to breaking point. Did she care that her actions may have caused her husband to commit suicide? How many of us here at some point felt we can no longer go on?

This person committed suicide because she sent the text to the wrong person, not because she was a cheater. If she had sent the text to whom it was intended may be she would have fulfilled her stated wish and done, "this more often."

[in it]

This person committed suicide because she sent the text to the wrong person, not because she was a cheater. If she had sent the text to whom it was intended may be she would have fulfilled her stated wish and done, "this more often."

So are you saying she took the pills because she was embarrassed that much by the text that she did something a final as commit suicide?

[limitless]

Honour,

I agree with your post.

For the LBS who may already feel responsible and down, worrying that you aren't forgiving quickly enough, isn't what we should be doing.

Suicide is selfishness to the extreme. She cheated in her spouse and then committed suicide and possibly left him with a level of guilt that he may never be able to shake. How selfish and cruel is that?  Had he not had enough hurt already?

There is or was clearly more going wrong with her that she would enlist such an extreme act 

No. This is in no way the spouse's fault.

I know how low I felt after BD and when my Ex left. My kids agreed to "take turns" being with me because they worried about me being alone. (I heard about this much later).  It makes me smile with gratitude and love that my kids wanted to help and protect me. But I do know that they were relieved when I got stronger and didn't worry them anymore. (They have zero problem leaving me now)!

This story is about an unbalanced woman who probably had more issues than MLC, if it was MLC at all.

L

[in it]

I was apt to commit suicide this time around than last..due to the kids. I never felt like committing suicide over him.
I agree with a lot of what you said Limitless..maybe T should just get rid of this thread.