[in it]

Narcissism is a complex and often misunderstood character disorder. Less attention has been paid to the person who supplies what the narcissist needs.

This person is known as a narcissistic extension, and can suffer tremendous trauma and abuse while feeling blameworthy.

It is a difficult dilemma to solve, and is often perpetuated in adult relationships when children have had narcissistic parents, and less so, parents who act as narcissistic extensions.

[Lovebystanding]

In it
This person is known as a narcissistic extension, and can suffer tremendous trauma and abuse while feeling blameworthy.

 They orbit around the narcissist to keep the marriage intact.
My MIL did this and H was the same .....I refused to encourage the abnormal behaviour which made me the bad DIL.

In ' The Narcissistic Family Portrait' on page 1

One Parent Narcissistic, The Other Orbits:
If one parent is narcissistic, it is common for the other parent to have to revolve around the narcissist to keep the marriage intact. Many times the other parent has redeeming qualities to give to the children, but is tied up meeting the needs of the narcissistic spouse. This often leaves the children's needs unmet. Who is there for them?

[Albatross]

Nobody. That is the problem. Children grow up alone without parental love. That is why they can have low self esteem co-dependent behavior, conflict avoidance, fear of abandonment, never develop fully emotionally and as persons also can develop PD's.

[in it]

EXACTLY! Whatever information you can keep up about this the clearer things will get.

 A codependent thread has been started. That's the behavior everybody has do to the MLC. In certain degrees.

 IMHO

I've gotta go..be back later..

((Hugs))

[Lovebystanding]

Albatross

That is so true.
But if the MLCer does not look inward then the LBS gets the projection.
At BD H blamed me because he did not get to see his mother before she died ....17yrs ago.
If I did'nt visit the in-laws H cud have ...why blame me.

Init
Knowledge is power

[Disneyme]

Attaching so I can find it.

[Albatross]

Albatross

That is so true.
But if the MLCer does not look inward then the LBS gets the projection.
At BD H blamed me because he did not get to see his mother before she died ....17yrs ago.
If I did'nt visit the in-laws H cud have ...why blame me.

Init
Knowledge is power

Yea. My MLCer look inward and conclude that she is nuts ! And she have to leave all and live alone instead changing self.
When we clash in February then she start to blame me ! Projection. So, after fight she stay in between. She blame self but wont change self ! Also blame me for something. And she reconsider is she loving me, then she conclude that she can't loving me. That we never been compatible and proceed with replay.
 

[Lovebystanding]

Mine has'nt yet looked inward ....everything is still my fault.
I got the same thing with regards to compatibility......we are not meant for each other.
.....replay and the OP....just like in ur case.

I told him that he was creating an emotional disconnect between us bc of the OP.
Of he did'nt want to hear the TRUTH.

[Snowdrop]

Mine has'nt yet looked inward ....everything is still my fault.
I got the same thing with regards to compatibility......we are not meant for each other.
.....replay and the OP....just like in ur case.

I told him that he was creating an emotional disconnect between us bc of the OP.
Of he did'nt want to hear the TRUTH.

All script. I wouldn't waste your breath talking about it. 

[Lovebystanding]

SD

That  was 6 mths ago...Lets hope he starts ruminating about what
I've said.....otherwise like u said it wud be a waste of effort.
Still early days...we shall see.